


worse than hell - (drv3 chatfic!!)

by pregame_kaede_kinnie



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: !!all mentions of atua have been changed to kami-sama!!, Alternate Universe - Hope's Peak Academy (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Author Is Sleep Deprived, Chatting & Messaging, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, F/M, For like 1 chapter, Guns, Hhhhhhh, Hospitals, I MEANT NOT, Iruma Miu & Oma Kokichi Friendship, Iruma Miu's Dirty Mouth, M/M, Me Neither, Minor Angst, Multi, Nonbinary K1-B0 (Dangan Ronpa), Past Amami Rantaro/Oma Kokichi - Freeform, Serious Injuries, Sexual Humor, and amaguji ;), chatfic yaaayyyy, if i missed some, its barely there, its gay, just like a few lines, kaede the piano fucker, kiibo is a victim of robophobia, like a lot, maybe ill do more with the author character, minor hurt/comfort, minor oumota, not just miu and kokichi too, not me forgetting about my twitter plot thingy lmao, omg evil author 🤭, oops i lied - from future author, or is it upuppupuppupu, oumami: i love you babe yes homo but nit to you, please comment on the chapter and what line i missed, remember when i posted nearly every day??, same with kiibouma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:47:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 45
Words: 41,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25960804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pregame_kaede_kinnie/pseuds/pregame_kaede_kinnie
Summary: bitch bottom: did you sculpt it angie??ultimate.lesbean: angie-san would never do something like that!!! stupid degenerate!!Kami-sama’s Slut: Yes!! Angie sculpted the dick!!~~ultimate.lesbean: WHAATTT?!?!sexy motorcycle vroom vroom: why-kaede makes a group chatit goes as well as you think
Relationships: Akamatsu Kaede/Iruma Miu, Amami Rantaro/Shinguji Korekiyo, Chabashira Tenko/Yonaga Angie, Chabashira Tenko/Yonaga Angie/Yumeno Himiko, Chabashira Tenko/Yumeno Himiko, Harukawa Maki/Momota Kaito, Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi, Yonaga Angie/Yumeno Himiko
Comments: 248
Kudos: 546





	1. the beginning of a rollercoaster, but not the good kind. this is the kind of rollercoaster that never ends and you’re sick but can’t get off oh god the person beside you puked oh fuck oh god AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment ships you’d like to see 🚢⛴🛳🛥😗

**[3.07pm]**

  
**Kaede Akamatsu created ‘Class 79!’**

**Kaede Akamatsu added Shuichi Saihara, Miu Iruma and 13 others**

**Shuichi Saihara** : What is this?

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : a class group chat!! all the other classes have them so i wanted to make one for us!!

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : _you made a big fucking mistake_

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : ??

**Kokichi Ouma has removed admin rights from 13 users**

**Kokichi Ouma has changed Kokichi Ouma to hatsunemikukinnie024**

**Miu Iruma** : you aCTUALLY FuCK8JWNS DID IT HAHAHAHAHABSBAAHBAAHAHQHHAAJ

 **hatsunemikukinnie024** **has changed Miu Iruma to kissvirgin**

 **hatsunemikukinnie024** : where’s my money bitch

 **kissvirgin** : fuck you

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : i understand what you mean now hoshi-kun

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : it happens to the best of us

 **Maki Harukawa** : it doesn’t

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : i just came online! what’s this??

 **hatsunemikukinnie024** : owo what’s dis

 **Maki Harukawa** : never open your mouth again

 **hatsunemikukinnie024** : *pounces on you*

 **Maki Harukawa** : you’re dead

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : god i wish that were me

 **Angie Yonaga** : *kami-sama!!~~

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : _that’s_ what you’re worried about?!

 **Rantaro Amami** : shirogane-san’s been typing for awhile

 **kissvirgin** : i bet she’s typing something super fucking horny

**hatsunemikukinnie024 has muted Miu Iruma for 30 minutes, reason: ew**

**Rantaro Amami** : wow savage

**hatsunemikukinnie024 has changed Rantaro Amami to Avocado Miami**

**Avocado Miami** : original

 **hatsunemikukinnie024** : your entire life is unoriginal whore

 **Avocado Miami** : ouch?

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : ouma-kun, please don’t bully your classmates!!

**hatsunemikukinnie024 has changed Kaede Akamatsu to distressed bi**

**distressed bi** : ssshhudupp

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : _@hatsunemiku024_ how dare you fucking tarnish the name of our motherfucking queen. I bet you don’t even know who she is, do you? I bet you heard, ‘The World Is Mine’ once and thought, “wow so cool and ’’’’’’relatable’’’’’’ uwu lolol” like the fucking bitch bottom you are. I bet you fucking thought you were educated and cultured on the art of vocaloid. I bet you didn’t even try to find more, that one was just enough for you, right? You couldn’t even put effort, could you? I hope you fucking regret what you’ve done before it’s too late.

 **distressed** **bi** : h

 **Tenko Chabashira** : tell the degenerate!!!!

 **Kirumi Tojo** : Why is Ouma-kun crying?

 **Avocado Miami** : scroll

 **Kirumi Tojo** : ah

 **Kirumi Tojo** : Lunch is ready.

 **hatsunemikukinnie024** : you’re so cruel mom :‘((

 **Kirumi Tojo** : I am not your mother.

**hatsunemikukinnie024 has changed Kirumi Tojo to Momther**

**Momther** : _@everyone_ Please make your way to the dining room as soon as you can.

 **hatsunemikukinnie024** : thnx mom!! <3  
  
 **Shuichi Saihara** : thank you, tojo-san

 **distressed bi** : thanks tojo-san!!!!

**All users are offline**

**[5.21pm]**   
  
**hatsunemikukinnie024 has changed Class 79! to worse than hell**

**hatsunemikukinnie024** : welcome bitches

**kissvirgin has changed hatsunemikukinnie024 to bitch bottom**

**bitch bottom has changed kissvirgin to hide the pans**

**hide the pans** : cant believe i actually like this name fuck

**bitch bottom has changed 12 names**

**moronsexual** : ouma-kun

 **bitch bottom** : owo?

 **moronsexual** : run.

**moronsexual is offline**

**bitch bottom** : fffuUaucjck

**bitch bottom is offline**

**distressed bi** : rip ouma gone to soon

 **momoron-chan** : more like gone too late

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : F in the chat for Kokichi!!~~

 **distressed bi** : F

 **it’s leviOsa** : F nyeh

 **ultimate.lesbean** : if himiko gave an F, tenko will too!!  
  
 **momoron-chan** : F

 **moronsexual** : F

 **ya like jazz** : F?

 **nico nico kneecaps** : F

 **weeb** : F

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : F

 **Momther** : F

 **ShinGUCCI** : F

 **hide the pans** : F lol

 **bitch bottom** : F

 **Avocado Miami** : f

 **weeb** : capitalize the F normie

 **Avocado Miami** : f f f f f f f ff f f f f f f ff f f r f f f ff f f ff f f f f f f f f f f

 **weeb** : fuck you

 **toaster** : Hello! Apologies for being late! How is everyone?

 **toaster** :

 **toaster** : Ouma-kun, this is robophobic!

 **bitch bottom** : no u

 **toaster** : I’m.... robophobic..?

 **bitch bottom** : yh

 **toaster** : I-

**toaster is offline**

**[7.01pm]**

**hide the pans** : who tf made kiibo question his existence

 **Avocado Miami** : _@bitch bottom_

 **bitch bottom** : traitor

 **Avocado Miami** : ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know nothing abt vocaloid, writing Tsumugi’s little rant was hard  
> -
> 
> Avocado Miami = Rantaro Amami  
> distressed bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> nico nico kneecaps = Ryoma Hoshi  
> Momther = Kirumi Tojo  
> Atua’s Slut: Angie Yonaga  
> ultimate.lesbean = Tenko Chabashira  
> shinGUCCI = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> hide the pans = Miu Iruma  
> ya like jazz = Gonta Gokuhara  
> bitch bottom = Kokichi Ouma  
> momoron-cha = Kaito Momota  
> weeb = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> toaster = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> it’s leviOsa = Himiko Yumeno  
> moronsexual = Maki Harukawa  
> sexy motocycle vroom vroom = Shuichi Saihara


	2. the mystery of the dick statue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Avocado Miami = Rantaro Amami  
> distressed bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> nico nico kneecaps = Ryoma Hoshi  
> Momther = Kirumi Tojo  
> Kami-sama’s Slut: Angie Yonaga  
> ultimate.lesbean = Tenko Chabashira  
> shinGUCCI = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> hide the pans = Miu Iruma  
> ya like jazz = Gonta Gokuhara  
> bitch bottom = Kokichi Ouma  
> momoron-cha = Kaito Momota  
> weeb = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> toaster = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> it’s leviOsa = Himiko Yumeno  
> moronsexual = Maki Harukawa  
> sexy motocycle vroom vroom = Shuichi Saihara

**[9.03am]**

**worse than hell**

**disrtressed bi** : are we really not talking about the giant dick statue in the living room

 **weeb** : oh thank god you spoke up!! i didn’t wanna be the first to speak about it!!

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : *Kami-sama!!~~

 **weeb** : yeah that

 **nico nico kneecaps** : _@hide the pans @bitch bottom_

 **bitch bottom** : i didn’t do it >:((

 **momoron-chan** : he’s lying!

 **hide the pans** : iIiIiIIIII didnntt do shitt!!!!11!1!1!1

 **Avocado Miami** : suspicious

 **hide the pans** : nO ITS NOT

 **bitch bottom** : did you sculpt it angie??

 **ultimate.lesbean** : angie-san would never do something like that!!! stupid degenerate!!

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Yes!! Angie sculpted the dick!!~~

 **ultimate.lesbean** : _WHAATTT?!?!_

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : _why_

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Angie got commissioned!! She was payed ¥1,000,000!!~~

 **bitch bottom** : holy heck

 **bitch bottom** : togami is quacking

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : With the request Angie uses one of the guys’ dicks as reference!! Angie has seen many dicks!!~~

 **bitch bottom** : can confirm

 **bitch bottom** : she tried to break into my room through the vents

 **hide the pans** : and you just let her go?!?!

 **bitch bottom** : with the price of showing me the photos ofc

 **hide the pans** : do you still have them  
  
 **bitch bottom** : come to my dorm

 **distressed bi** : _no._

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : i feel uncomfortable knowing two people and nearly three have seen my privates

 **hide the pans** : just outed urself as a loser virgin shithara!!!

 **weeb** : we’re literally teenagers?? i hope we’re all virgins tf??

 **Avocado Miami** :

 **bitch bottom** :

 **shinGUCCI** : Who would order such a thing from Angie-san?

 **ultimate.lesbean** : tell tenko so she can kick degenerate ass!!  
  
 **Atua’s Slut** : Sorry!!~~

 **Atua’s Slut** : The commission was anonymous!!~~

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : can’t your kami-sam tell you who it was?

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Kami-sama is sleeping!!~~

 **hide the pans** : ofc he fucking is

 **moronsexual** : don’t think we don’t know you commissioned her for the statue

 **hide the pans** : iiIiI dIDNT

 **it’s leviOsa** : suspicious

 **ultimate.lesbean** : yumeno-san!! use your magic to figure out who it is!!

 **it’s leviOsa** : nyeh ok

 **Avocado Miami** : wait seriously

 **weeb** : you’re mp’s not low as always??

 **it’s leviOsa** : noyeh

 **bitch bottom** : nowo

 **distressed bi** : bad post op

 **it’s leviOsa** : it was miu

 **momoron-chan** : i fucking knew it!

 **bitch bottom** : no you didnt loser

 **momoron-chan** : i’m not a loser!

 **hide the pans** : it wasNT MEEE

 **moronsexual** : you’re the only one who’d want something so gross

 **Avocado Miami** : harukawa-san a lesbian confirmed?

 **moronsexual** : _do you wanna die?_

 **hide the pans** : SOMEONE WANTED ME TO COMMISSION ANGIE FOR THEM I SWEAR

 **Avocado Miami** : fr?

 **bitch bottom** : mom’s been awfully quiet :))

 **ultimate.lesbean** : tojo-san would never want something like _that_!

 **Momther** :

 **distressed bi** : right?

 **Momther** :

**Momther is offline**

**bitch bottom** : didn’t even deny it

 **Avocado Miami** : HAHAHAHAAHAHHA SHE ACTUALLYYY

 **shinGUCCI** : Even the most proper and elegant have a dark side to them. How beautiful.

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : can someone just get rid of the statue

**hopegasm has added hopegasm to the chat**

**hopegasm** : anything for hope!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hopegasm = Nagito Komaeda
> 
> wayany, their living room has exploded


	3. “mistakes were made” “yeah, you”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Avocado Miami = Rantaro Amami  
> distressed bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> nico nico kneecaps = Ryoma Hoshi  
> Momther = Kirumi Tojo  
> Kami-sama’s Slut: Angie Yonaga  
> ultimate.lesbean = Tenko Chabashira  
> shinGUCCI = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> hide the pans = Miu Iruma  
> ya like jazz = Gonta Gokuhara  
> bitch bottom = Kokichi Ouma  
> momoron-cha = Kaito Momota  
> weeb = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> toaster = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> it’s leviOsa = Himiko Yumeno  
> moronsexual = Maki Harukawa  
> sexy motocycle vroom vroom = Shuichi Saihara

**[9.49pm]**

**worse than hell**

**weeb** : IM PLAINLY SORRY

 **distressed bi** : what are you sorry about shirogane-san??

 **weeb** : OPEN THE DOOR SO I CAN APOLOGIZE YOU ASS

 **bitch bottom** : THAT’S NOT HOW YOU APOLOGIZE

 **weeb** : OPEN THE DOOR SO I CAN APOLOGIZE PROPERLY THEN

 **bitch bottom** : get on your knees and beg

 **weeb** : open the door and i might

 **ultimate.lesbean** : don’t let the degenerate do anything to you shirogane-san!!!!

 **momoron-chan** : why do you need to apologize

 **weeb** : i may or may not havejjekewkwksoaoa

 **distressed bi** : shirogane-san?!?!?!?!?!  
  
 **Momther** : Are you alright, Shirogane-san?

 **hide the pans** : you sure love screaming her name

 **ya like jazz** : someone scream??

 **nico nico kneecaps** : don’t worry about it

 **ya like jazz** : okay!!

 **nico nico kneecaps** : thin fucking ice _@hide the pans_

 **hide the pans** : hhhhhhHHHHHWHEEHSHEEE

 **weeb** : _@distressed bi @Momther_ don’t worry!! i’m plainly fine!!

 **distressed bi** : are you sure?

 **Avocado Miami** : kokichi didn’t do anything did he?

 **weeb** : nope! i left since he wouldn’t accept my plainly amazing apology

 **bitch bottom** : i plainly don’t sound like that!!

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : ??

 **dsitressed bi** : ouma-kun????

 **weeb** : HOW’D YOU UNLOCK MY PHONE

 **bitch bottom** : 42069 isn’t a hard passcode

 **weeb** : give me my phone

 **bitch bottom** : give it first  
  
 **weeb** :

 **bitch bottom** :

 **moronsexual** : why are the weeb and the dumbass staring at each other without blinking

 **Avocado Miami** : scroll

 **moronsexual** : if i wanted to do that i wouldn’t be asking for an explanation

 **bitch bottom** : fine here’s your phone

 **weeb** : YES

 **weeb** : MY BABYYYYY

 **distressed bi** : did you give each other your phones back?

 **weeb** : it was plainly awful being away from the light in my life

 **leviOsa** : that’s nyesad

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Kami-sama says Tsumugi did something Kokichi didn’t like!!~~

 **weeb** : why else would i be apologizing

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : ouma-kun, why did you block me?

 **weeb** : SDJSOAIMANSKSKSKSKSKSKS

 **bitch bottom** : STFU

 **weeb** : YOU BLOCKED HIM?!?!

 **bitch bottom** : WHAT ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?!?!

 **weeb** : THIS IS AMAZING I CANNNTNTNTM AHAHHAHYHYHHAHAAHAH

 **distressed bi** : ouma?? shirogane??

  
**[11.04pm]**

**tsumtsum — > kichi**

**tsumtsum** : COULDN’T YOU HAVE DELETED THE MESSAGE?!?!

 **kichi** : NO

 **kichi** : I TRIED TO BUT IT WOULDN’T WORK

 **tsumtsum** : WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT WOULDN’T WORK?!

 **kichi** : IT MEANS THAT IT DIDN’T WORK

 **kichi** : this is your fault

 **weeb** : you gave me your phone

 **kichi** : i shouldn’t have

 **weeb** : yeah plainly you shouldn’t have

  
**[3.11am]**

**worse than hell**

**bitch bottom changed weeb to backstabber >:((**

**backstabber >:((** : IM SORRY OKAY

 **backstabber >:((** : I WON’T PLAY MATCHMAKER AGAIN I PROMISE

 **bitch bottom** : too late >:((

**bitch bottom has removed admin rights from backstabber >:((**

**sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : i’m sure what she did wasn’t that bad ouma-kun

 **sexy motorcycle vrrom vroom** : please don’t be petty

 **biggest bottom** :

 **bitch bottom** : _fiinnnneeeeeeeeee_

**bitch bottom has changed backstabber >:(( to junkofan123**

**junkofan123** : smjsskdjnsksksksjjdjsjd

 **junkofan123** : fUCK YoU

 **junkofan123** : ONE TIME

 **bitch bottom** : payback bitch

 **Momther** : Ouma-kun, Shirogane-san, Saihara-kun and all the lurkers, I advice you to go to sleep. We have class tomorrow.

 **junkofan123** : ofc tojo-san! im plainly sorry for the trouble!!

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : yes, tojo-san

 **bitch bottom** : ok _moommm_

 **Momther** : Goodnight.

**All users are offline**

**[4.20am]**

**worse than hell**

**hide the pans** : haha blaze it

 **Momther** : _Do not make me repeat myself._

 **hide the pans** : HhHseheheeeeeeee FInE

**hide the pans and Momther are offline**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please give me ships im begging plz


	4. irumatsu nation come get yall juice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is,,,, uh,,,
> 
> (119: japanese emergency number, i think)
> 
> this chapter was boring :(

**[5.09pm]**

**worse than hell**

**hide the pans** : uhh

 **bitch bottom** : what did you do whore

 **hide the pans** : if hypothetically

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : oh no

 **hide the pans** : _HYPOTHETICALLY_

 **toaster** : Are you alright, Iruma-san?

 **toaster** : I heard a lot of cursing and weird noises from your room.

 **Avocado Miami** : _“weird noises”_

 **junkofan123** : i plainly don’t want to hear the “hypothetical” question anymore

 **hide the pans** : STFU AND LISTEN

 **bitch bottom** : no❤️

 **distressed bi** : don’t worry iruma-san! i’ll listen!

 **hide the pans** : o-okay

 **nico nico kneecaps** : did you just stutter through text

 **hide the pans** : FUCK OFF

 **hide the pans** : a-anyway

 **hide the pans** : if hypothetically someone tried to please themselves with a screwdriver

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : a what now

 **hide the pans** : but it got stuck

 **bitch bottom** : this is gold

 **bitch bottom** : i’m printing this and gluing it on my wall

 **shinGUCCI** : _you got a screwdriver stuck in your private area._

 **leviOsa** : ny _ew_ h

 **Momther** : i’m disowning you

 **ultimate.lesbean** : don’t worry iruma-san!! tenko will help!!

 **distressed bi** : i’ll help too

**ultimate.lesbean and distressed bi are offline**

**hide the pans** : thanks...

 **bitch bottom** : CSNEJNDEKDJKSJAKSJDNDJSIANWJIDJSSM

 **bitch bottom** : I CANNTTTTTT

 **Avocado Miami** : he’s been laughing for 10 minutes

 **junkofan123** : and how would you know

 **leviOsa** : you two aren’t doing anything nylewd are you?

 **bitch bottom** : SJNJASJAAJS

 **Avocado Miami** : i’ll calm him down

**Avocado Miami and bitch bottom are offline**

**junkofan123** : _suspicious._

 **distressed bi** : TOJO-SAN HELP

 **Momther** : What is it, Akamatsu-san?

 **distressed bi** : THE SCREWDRIVER WON’T COME OUT

 **hide the pans** : yes chabshirsnjust like thatttt

 **ultimage.lesbean** : tenko doesn’t want to help anymore

 **Momther** : I will contact 119

 **toaster** : Ouma-kun, please stop laughing at Iruma-san’s pain

 **ya like jazz:** kiibo with ouma-kun too?

 **Avocado Miami** : no

 **Avocado Miami** : he’s just laughing that loud

**[7.55pm]**

**i hate my class**  
  
 **eggy** : is everything okay? _@piaNO @betterdetective_

 **detective** : i saw an ambulance come to the harmony dorm

 **piaNO** : you don’t want to know

 **hajimeme** : if it’s something stupid then you’re right

 **creeper aw man** : hajime, sit

 **hajimeme** : wh

 **creeper aw man** : if an ambulance was involved then i’m sure it’s bad

 **eggy** : what happened :(

 **betterdetective** : our classmate got a screwdriver stuck in her privates

 **eggy** :

 **eggy** : wh

 **hajimeme** : i really didn’t want to know

**detective has left the chat**

**eggy** : kyoko :(

 **creeper aw man** : this is worse than the pain i felt when sayori died

 **piaNO** : you shouldn’t have told them  
  


**[1.24am]**

**girl genius — > kayayday**

**girl genius** : thanks for staying with me at the hospital....

 **kayayday** : you’re welcome!

 **kayayday** : i didn’t mind

 **kayaday** : sort of

 **girl genius** : why are you awake

 **kayayday** : uhh

 **kayayday** : i was worried about you

 **girl genius** : about me?

 **girl genius** : why

 **girl genius** : _i mean_ of course you’d be worried about the gorgeous girl genius!!

 **kayayday** : why are you awake then?

 **girl genius** :

 **girl genius** : brb

 **kayayday** : ?

  
  


**[1.45am]**

**whore — > slut**   
  


**whore** : WHAT DO I DO SHE ASKED WHY I WAS AWAKE

 **slut** : because you’re a pussy and had to take hours to work up the courage to text her

 **whore** : stfu shitty shota i can’t say that

 **slut** : or you can ask her on a date to distract her ;)

 **whore** : good idea

 **slut** : i was joking

 **slut** :

 **slut** : i hope she rejects you

 **slut** : but that’s a lie

  
**[2.00am]**

**kayayday — > girl genius**   
  


**kayayday** : iruma???

 **girl genius** : go on a date with me

 **kayayday** :

 **kayayday** : huh

 **girl genius** : date me

 **kayayday** : are you being serious?

 **girl genius** : as serious as the shota being a bottom

 **kayayday** : ok then

 **kayayday** : tomorrow at pastel cafe?

 **girl genius** : ok

**[2.07am]  
**

**worse than hell  
  
**

**hide the pans** : AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

 **bitch bottom** : lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Avocado Miami = Rantaro Amami  
> kayayday, piaNO, distressed bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> nico nico kneecaps = Ryoma Hoshi  
> Momther = Kirumi Tojo  
> Kami-sama’s Slut: Angie Yonaga  
> ultimate.lesbean = Tenko Chabashira  
> shinGUCCI = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> whore, girl genius, hide the pans = Miu Iruma  
> ya like jazz = Gonta Gokuhara  
> slut, bitch bottom = Kokichi Ouma  
> momoron-chan = Kaito Momota  
> junkofan123 = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> toaster = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> leviOsa = Himiko Yumeno  
> moronsexual = Maki Harukawa  
> betterdetective, sexy motocycle vroom vroom = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> eggy = Makoto Naegi  
> detective = Kyoko Kirigiri  
> creeper aw man = Chiaki Nanami  
> hajimeme = Hajime Hinata


	5. omg is that,,, filler?!?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this entire fic is filler

**[9.23pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**ultimate.lesbean** : degenerate clown where are you

 **ultimate.lesbean** : tenko just wanna talk

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : somehow i doubt that

 **ultimate.lesbean** : shut up degenerate!!

 **distressed bi** : why are you looking for ouma-kun?

 **ultimate.lesbean** : he replaced himiko’s amazing mage equipment with garbage store bought magician kits!!

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Kami-sama says Kokichi is in the last place Tenko would look!!~~  
  
 **junkofan123** : can’t he just tell teenko where he is directly

 **Avocado Miami** : _teenko_

 **ultimate.lesbean** : don’t make fun of a girl degenerate!!  
  
 **distressed bi** : why did i hear a scream?!

 **sexy motorcycle vroom vroom** : shirogane-san?! are you okay?

 **ultimate.lesbean** : tenko is coming!!

 **Momther** : I will accompany you, Chabashira-san.

**ultimate.lesbean and Momther are offline**

**junkofan123** : WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT

 **junkofan123** : I’M PLAINLY TERRIFIED

 **momoron-chan** : what happened?!

 **junkofan123** : THERE WAS A STRANGE MAN CRAWLING AROUND THE VENTS

 **Avocado Miami** : you sure it wasn’t balloon boy?

 **junkofan123** : stfu avocado

 **shinGUCCI** : How interesting.

 **leviOsa** : nyewhat is?

 **shinGUCCI** : kekekeekkekeeke

 **hide the pans** : creep

 **shinGUCCI** : whore.

 **hide the pans** : HIIIIEEHEEHEEEEHEEHH

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Kami-sama is not pleased with the sinful sounds leaving your mouth Miu!!~~  
  
 **hide the pans** : yeah and the fuck is he supposed to do

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : _you don’t want to know._

 **distressed bi** : oh no

 **distressed bi** : she didn’t use the “~~”

 **toaster** : Please don’t do anything to Iruma-san...

 **bitch bottom** : DJISDJSIDJIWJSJSJAIAJANA

 **hide the pans** : tf

 **moronsexual** : i found the strange man crawling through the vents

 **junkofan123** : IT WAS YOU?!?!

 **bitch bottom** : the vents are cool

 **Avocado Miami** : fair enough

 **Momther** : Please do not crawl through the vents and scare people anymore, Ouma-kun.

 **bitch bottom** : ok mom!!

 **Momther** : Please do not refer to me as mother either.

 **nico nico kneecaps** : is that the interesting thing you mentioned, shinguji-kun

 **shinGUCCI** : Indeed it is.

 **junkofan123** : give me admin rights _@bitch bottom_

 **bitch bottom** : no.

**hide the pans has given admin rights to junkofan123**

**bitch bottom** : >:(

 **hide the pans** : bitch.

**junkofan123 changed bitch bottom to Kowokchi**

**junkofan123 changed sexy motorcycle vroom vroom to Shuwuichi**

**Kowokchi** :

 **Shuwuichi** : ah.

 **Shuwuichi** : i guess i don’t mind

**Kowokchi is offline**

**[10.39pm]**

**strip club**

**pole dancer** : SJISDJISDNINSIWSJNSJS

 **a regular** : fucking simp

 **pole dancer** : i’ll add akamatsu-san

 **a regular** : _you wouldn’t._

 **pole dancer** : _try me._

 **the bartender** : why would it matter if akamatsu-san is here?

 **pole dancer** : irumatsu is canon :)

 **a regular** : DON’T TELL HER THAT

**the bartender is typing**

**stripper** : sighs

**[3.58am]**

**strip club**

**the bartender has sent whyirumatsuisamazing.docx**

**pole dancer** : omg it has 1 000 pages wtf

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stripper, Avocado Miami = Rantaro Amami  
> distressed bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> nico nico kneecaps = Ryoma Hoshi  
> Momther = Kirumi Tojo  
> Kami-sama’s Slut: Angie Yonaga  
> ultimate.lesbean = Tenko Chabashira  
> shinGUCCI = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> a regular, hide the pans = Miu Iruma  
> ya like jazz = Gonta Gokuhara  
> pole dancer, Kowokchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> momoron-chan = Kaito Momota  
> the bartender, junkofan123 = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> toaster = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> leviOsa = Himiko Yumeno  
> moronsexual = Maki Harukawa  
> Shuwuichi = Shuichi Saihara


	6. this is for “SorryForWhatISaidWhendDrunk”, you gave me motivation :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is so badd hhhhhh-

**[9.29pm]  
  
worse than hell**

**  
Kowokchi** : _@Shuwuichi_ im trash take me out

 **junkofan123** : JSJSMSJSJSJEJEJJWJWJSJSSM

 **hide the pans** : HAAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHJAJSJSJS

 **toaster** : Ouma-kun, do not call yourself trash! You are an amazing person!

 **Avocado Miami** : it was just a pickupline kiibs

 **toaster** : ‘Pickupline’?

 **toaster** : I will research what that is, give me a moment!

 **distressed bi** : why is shuichi blushing like crazy

 **moronsexual** : scroll

 **distressed bi** : oh-

 **distressed bi** : OH

 **momoron-chan** : whys ooma calling himself trash?????

 **distressed bi** : ooma

 **moronsexual** : ooma

 **hide the pans** : ooma

 **junkofan123** : ooma

 **Avocado Miami** : ooma

 **shinGUCCI:** ooma

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Ooma!!~~

 **nico nico kneecaps** : ooma

 **ya like jazz** : ooma!!

 **ultimate.lesbean** : ooma

 **leviOsa** : nyooma

 **Momther** : ooma

 **momoron-chan** : guys!!! D:<

**Kowokchi changed momoron-chan to oompa-loompa**

**oompa-loompa** : this is bullying

 **moronsexual** : stop being a moron and then maybe we wont bully you

 **Avocado Miami** : read your name

 **Avocado Miami** : _slowly_

**moronsexual is offline**

**distressed bi** : awww!!

 **distressed bi** : she must be flustered!!!

 **junkofan123** : judging by the screaming coming from rantaro’s room you’re absolutely right

 **oompa-loompa** : why would she be flustered

 **Kowokchi** : you’re totally not serious

 **Kowokchi** : you cant be that stupid

 **ultimate.lesbean** : he actually might be that stupid!!

 **hide the pans** : im getting dejavu wtf

 **Momther** : Go to sleep everyone, we have school tommorow.

 **distressed bi** : good night everyone!!! :D

 **nico nico kneecaps** : gn

 **ultimate.lesbean** : good night girls!!! <3 <3 <3

 **toaster** : I have finally understood the art of pickup lines!

 **Avocado Miami** : gn guys

 **toaster** : Oh, is it bedtime already?

 **Avocado Miami** : yup

 **toaster** : Good night then! Sleep well everyone!

 **ultimate.lesbean** : you’re on thin ice almost-degenerate

 **ultimate.lesbean** : good night i guess

 **ya like jazz** : gonta say good night!!!

 **ultimate.lesbean** : good night non-degenerate!!

  
**[11.52pm]**

**worse than hell**

**Shuwuichi** : ok im back what did i miss

 **distressed bi** : were you seriously flustered over a pickup line for that long

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Avocado Miami = Rantaro Amami  
> distressed bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> nico nico kneecaps = Ryoma Hoshi  
> Momther = Kirumi Tojo  
> Kami-sama’s Slut: Angie Yonaga  
> ultimate.lesbean = Tenko Chabashira  
> shinGUCCI = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> hide the pans = Miu Iruma  
> ya like jazz = Gonta Gokuhara  
> Kowokchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junkofan123 = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> toaster = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> leviOsa = Himiko Yumeno  
> moronsexual = Maki Harukawa  
> Shuwuichi = Shuichi Saihara


	7. i forgot this existed holy hell

**[7.08am]**

**worse than hell**

  
**Kowokchi** : _owowowowowowo uwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwu owowowowow uwuwuwuwuw_

 **oompa loompa** : no.

 **Kowokchi** : _owo? dwoes mowomowota-chan nwot lwike howow i spweak?_

 **moronsexual** : commit toaster bath

 **Kowokchi** : aight

 **Kowokchi** : _@toaster_ let’s take a bath together ;D

 **toaster** : WHA T WHDBEJEEICDNSNCDJCDJCJDNV

**toaster is offline**

**Avocado Miami** : you broke him

 **hide the pans** : stop flirting with kiibabe you have your own bf twink

 **Kowokchi** : no❤️

 **distressed bi** : you two need to get together already!!

 **hide the pans** : even kaeidiot agrees!!

 **junkofan123** : that’s because she‘s fucking you

 **hide the pans** : at least i didn’t write a whole essay on mine and kaede’s fucking relatsionship

 **distressed bi** : _she did what_

 **Momther** : I didn’t know you two were an item. Congratulations.

 **distressed bi** : thnx tojo-san!!! ily <33

 **hide the pans** : >:(

 **distressed bi** : <3 <3 <3

 **hide the pans** :

 **hide the pans** : <3

 **moronsexual** : gross

 **Kowokchi** : ew a cishet

 **oompa-loompa** : what’s wrong with being cis and straight?!

 **oompa-loompa** : this is heterophobia!!!!

 **nico nico kneecaps** : pretty sure ouma-kun wasn’t being serious

 **leviOsa** : pretty sure momota-kun isn’t ny _het_

 **Kami-sama’s Slut** : Kami-sama confirms!!~~

 **Kowokchi** : OMG DNWUWHHWDBHWDHWUD

 **Kowokchi** : HE’S FUC KIN G DJENDJSBDSUHDSJ

 **distressed bi** : what is he doing,,,,

 **shinGUCCI** : Humanity is truly idiotic.

 **Avocado Maimi** : i thought we were beutiful? :(

 **shinGUCCI** : *beautiful

 **shinGUCCI** : I’ll make an exception for you.

 **Avocado Miami** : nice love you bye <3

**Avoacado Miami is offline**

**shinGUCCI** :

**shinGUCCI is offline**

**Shuwuichi** : sometimes i wonder why i’m kaito’s friend

 **moronsexual** : me too

 **Kowokchi** : read your name but _slowly  
_

 **moronsexual** : i’m going to kill you

 **hide the pans** : SHHH

 **hide the pans** : HE’S GETTING TO THE BEST PART

**All users are offline**

**[8.47am]**

**Mono family**

**  
sexy bear dad** : what the fuck is your student doing mono children

 **the annoying blue one** : FUCKING INSPERTENOIAL

 **bearkuya topawmi** : no it wasn’t it was disgusting

 **bearkuya topawmi** : and *inspirational

 **dumb loli sister** : i’m sure momota-kun was just trying to inspire his fellow hetero friends that heterophobia should be fought against!!

 **sexy bear dad** : tf is heterophobia

 **toaster #2** : I’m sure even you don’t believe in stupid things like that Monomi-aunt.

 **dumb loli sister** : i was trying to be nice :((

 **AWESOME NINJA** : lol is momota even het

 **less attractive loli** : of all the days to be sick (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)

 **AWESOME NINJA** : your name o.o

 **less attractive loli** : fuck you uncle im fucking beautiful

 **sexy bear dad** : no ur not

 **dumb loli sister** : should we tell Monophanie-chan what happened?

 **the annoying blue one** : GOT THE WHOLE SHIT ON KAMRA YEAAAHHH

 **bearkuya topawmi** : *camera

 **the annoying blue one** : _stpphetrpphooobya2020.mp4_

 **bearkuya topawmi** : how do you mess up spelling this bad

* * *

  
The video began. Momota was standing on a chair in the middle of the cafeteria, despite class starting, multiple phones pointed at him, including Monokid’s phone that was recording at that moment.

”All heteros, I need you to listen!” Momota’s loud voice boomed throught the cafeteria. Iruma was already cackling while Ouma snickered, recording the other purple haired male.

”We have been shamed and oppressed for far too long! The gays won’t let us express our love for pussy and I can’t stand by and watch any longer!” There were whoops coming from the other students, though most were mocking or sarcastic. Momota didn’t notice.

”Kaito, get down, we have class.” Harukawa, pulled on Momota’s sleeve, but was shooed by the male.

”I need to motivate the straights!” Momota whisper-shouted back.

”Momota-kun, you’re straight?!” Akamatsu gasped in shock, hand covering her mouth.

”Of course I am!” Momota yells back, growing frustrated by the loud wheezing coming from Ouma and Iruma. “They call us things like ‘cishet’ and ‘straggot’, but we won’t be insulted anymore! We need to make a safe space for the straights! We need equality!” Momota yells.

”T-this is too-“ Ouma wheezes, barely able to breath between laughs. “-too good!”

”S-straggot?!” Iruma cackles loudly.

”Kaito, didn’t you say you thought Ouma-kun was rather attractive when nice?” Saihara, the detective and the only one who remembers anything if Akamatsu and Tojo don’t count.  
  
“Well, yeah. He’s kinda attractive, but a huge ass.” Momota, turns toward Saihara with confusion plastered all across his features.

”Would you date him if he was nicer?” Akamatsu asks, catching onto what Saihara was doing.

”Yeah? What has that got to do with anything?” Ouma’s and Iruma’s laughs grew louder.

”You stupid degenerate! It means you’re not a hetero! Hetero-degenerates don’t want to date other degenerates!!” Chabashira yelled at the confused asstronaut. Momota’s eyes widened and his mouth stayed agape.

”For real? That explains so much!” Momota didn’t look too surprised.

”Let’s just go to class.” Tojo sighed, grabbing Ouma and throwing him over her shoulder. Akamatsu took a gentler approach and grabbed Iruma’s hand, dragging her along. Iruma and Ouma hadn’t stopped laughing, even when class started.

* * *

  
**dumb loli sister** : i can’t believe i tried to defend that

 **sexy bear dad** : monomi you dumb child

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think i wanna add the other classes 👉👈🥺  
> thoughts?
> 
> *
> 
> Avocado Miami = Rantaro Amami  
> distressed bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> nico nico kneecaps = Ryoma Hoshi  
> Momther = Kirumi Tojo  
> Kami-sama’s Slut: Angie Yonaga  
> ultimate.lesbean = Tenko Chabashira  
> shinGUCCI = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> hide the pans = Miu Iruma  
> ya like jazz = Gonta Gokuhara  
> Kowokchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junkofan123 = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> toaster = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> leviOsa = Himiko Yumeno  
> moronsexual = Maki Harukawa  
> Shuwuichi = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> sexy bear dad = Monokuma  
> dumb loli sister = Monomi/Usami  
> the annoying blue one = Monokid  
> bearkuya topawmi = Monosuke  
> toaster #2 = Monodam  
> less attractive loli = Monophanie  
> AWESOME NINJA = Monotaro


	8. a super fun game that’s not boring!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: spicy secrets 😍😳👀👁👅👁🍆💦💦💦

**[6.09am]**

**worse than hell**

**Kowokchi** : the chat’s dead :(

 **Avocado Miami** : after the stunt you pulled im not surprised

 **Kowokchi** : _awe ywu bwullying mwe rwantawo? uwu_

 **Avocado Miami** : _ywes owo_

 **Shuwuichi** : **_why_**

**Mastermind has added Mastermind to the chat**

**hide the pans** : tf?????

 **Kowokchi** : i thought you made the chat unhackable?!?!

 **hide the pans** : i did!!!!

**Mastermind has added admin rights to Mastermind**

**Momther** : I assume this should not be possible?

 **toaster** : It definitely shouldn’t.

**Mastermind removed admin rights from 3 users**

**junkofan123** : WH?????

 **junkofan123** : MY ADMIN RIGHTS

 **Mastermind** : junkofan123?

 **Mastermind** : wow! im like totally flattered you love me that much!!

 **junkofan123** : ENOSHIMA-SAN?!?!!???!?!????!????!!!

 **Kowokchi** : gasp not my bff junko >:0

 **Mastermind** : Heyyy twink!!!

 **Kowokchi** : ew a whore

 **hide the pans** : i thought i was your whore :(

 **distressed bi** : miu please

 **toaster** : Iruma-san please don’t tell me your upset Ouma-kun called someone else a whore.

 **hide the pans** : fine i won’t tell you

 **Mastermind** : anywayyyyyyyyyyyyyy

 **Mastermind** : we’re gonna play a suupeerr fun game!!!!

 **Kowokchi** : as long as it’s not a killing game :)

 **Mastermind** : nah i scrapped the idea it was boring lol

 **Shuwuichi** : excuse me _what_

 **shinGUCCI** : Humanity truly has gone down the drain.

 **Avocado Miami** : :(

 **shinGUCCI** : I said what I said, no exceptions.

 **Mastermind** : it’s gonna be a secret revealing game!!1!1!1!

**Mastermind has changed 16 user names**

**Mastermind** : _@everyone_

 **Mastermind** : have fun!! upupupupupu~~~~~

 **dated the twink gremlin in middle school** : uhh

 **jumped off a tree while trying to fly** : not true!!!!!

 **has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : mine too......

 **married to a male** : I SWEAR I’M NOT!!!

 **had a crush on every guy in this gc** : this is

 **had a crush on every guy in this gc** : not fun

 **is the bottom** : even the creep, twink and shortie????

 **is the bottom** : WAIT NO FUCK YOU

 **has a gf** : minyeh’s not that bad

 **was romantically in love with a piano** : we should all say something so we can see all the secrets

 **was romantically in love with a piano** : i’ll start

 **was romantically in love with a piano** : hi....

 **has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : hi,,  
  
 **married to a male** : hi girls!!!!

 **not a virgin** : hello!!

 **won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it** : Hello...

 **had a crush on every guy in this gc** : hi hi

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : hey

 **forgot the bottom outside overnight** : Hello.

 **is the bottom** : fuck you for that whoever you are

 **had a nightcore phase** : can’t you just say who they are

 **is the bottom** : not all of us have godly memory

 **draws nsfw stuff of their classmates** : *kami-samanly!!~~

 **jumped off a tree while trying to fly:** sup!

 **has a gf** : nyeh

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : Hello......

 **has a maki body pillow** : uh-

 **never chokes gremlin again cuz he moaned 2 months ago** : _**do you wanna die?**_

 **has a maki body pillow** : IM SORRY MAKI IT WAS A COMMISSION

 **married to a male** : but you kept it?!

 **married to a male** : DEGENERATE!!!!!!

**Mastermind has changed never chokes gremlin again cuz he moaned 2 months ago to ass ass in**

**ass ass in** : i’ll kill you

 **Mastermind** : i’d like to see you try lololololol

**Mastermind muted ass ass in for 2 hours, reason: _mean killer girl :((_**

**[7.23am]**

**kowokchi owo — > juwunkowo uwu**

**kowokchi owo** : change my secret >:(((((

 **juwunkowo uwu** : i could tell them all you’re a fake :)

 **kowokchi owo** : wow thanks for reminding me on why we’re not friends anymore :)

 **juwunkowo uwu** : you love me kichi!! <3 <3 <3 <3

 **kowokchi owo** : no <3

 **juwunkowo uwu** : your hatred brings me so much despair!! （＾Ｏ＾）

**kowokchi owo has blocked juwunkowo uwu**

**[7.25am]**

**worse than hell**

**had a crush on every guy in this gc** : let’s get the obvious ones out the wayy

 **has photo’s from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : you mean chabashira-san, yumeno-san, kaede and, angie?

 **had a crush on every guy in this gc** : duhh

 **won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it** : _@was romantically in love with a piano_ is akamatsu-san, correct?

 **was romantically in love with a piano** : yeah...

**Mastermind changed was romantically in love with a piano to piano fucker**

**piano fucker** : fuck you

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : can we talk about akamatsu-san’s and harukawa-san’s secrets before we move on

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : Akamatsu-san was attracted to a piano..... romantically....

 **piano fucker** : I WAS 5

**Mastermind unmuted ass ass in**

**Mastermind** : explain your secret ;))

 **ass ass in** : there’s nothing to explain

 **ass ass in:** ouma moaned while i was choking him and now I’m traumatized

 **is the bottom** : cant believe i would ever see the day that I’m jealous of the twink

 **ass ass in** : i’m going to kill you iruma-san

 **is the bottom** : yes mommy please kill me

 **ass ass in** : nvm wtf

**Mastermind changed is the bottom to kinklandia**

**kinklandia** : if i didn’t have a gf i’d totally be down to fuck you

 **Mastermind** : as if **_bottom_**

 **kinklandia** : WE SWITCH

 **has a maki body pillow** : please don’t tell us about your sex life

 **ass ass in** : i’ll burn your wigs if you don't get rid of the body pillow

 **has a maki body pillow** : _NOOOOOO_

 **has a maki body pillow** : ~~_i mean_~~

 **has a maki body pillow** : i don’t have any wigs tho????  
  
 **ass ass in** : you’re fucking dead shirogane

**Mastermind changed has a maki body pillow to junko’s wife and gf**

**junko’s wife and gf** : STOOPPP I WAS 14 PLEASSS

**ass ass in is offline**

**junko’s wife and gf** : wait _fuc k_

**junko’s wife and gf is offline**

**dated twink gremlin in middle school** : ?

 **kinklandia** : wait someone actually fucking dated the twink

 **had a crush on every guy in this gc** : wait someone actually dates this whore

 **kinklandia** : YES IM YOUR WHORE KOKICHI FORGET ENOSHITMA

 **Mastermind** : rude >:(

**Mastermind changed had a crush on every guy in this gc to mr trust issues**

**piano fucker** : miu please

 **had a nightcore phase** : _stop moaning im literally begging_

 **mr trust issues** : welp

 **mr trust issues** : never thought i’d be outed by miu’s never-ending horniness

 **mr trust issues** : also fuck you enoshima :))

 **Mastermind** : ;)

 **junko’s wife and gf** : wait _every_ guy

 **mr trust issues** : stfu ms 100 ch slowburn saiouma 900k word fic with 1m kudos

 **junko’s wife and gf** : thnx for the free advertisement!! <3

 **mr trust issues** : what was that?

 **mr trust issues** : delete the whole fic and the sequel you’re working on?

 **junko’s wife and gf** : NOOO KOKICHI I SWEAR YOU FUCKING BOTTOM

 **mr trust issues** : never speak of this again and i won’t do shit ok

 **junko’s wife and gf** : ok,,,,,,

 **mr trust issues** : this never happened

 **junko’s wife and gf** : never happened,,,

 **mr trust issues** : anyway _@draw nsfw stuff of their classmates_ is angie lol

**Mastermind changed draws nsfw stuff of their classmates to kami-sama kink**

**kami-sama kink** : Kami-sama will make sure you never breathe again!!~~

 **piano fucker** : uh

 **piano fucker** : ouma-kun’s scary when he wants to be (yonaga-san too)

 **had a nightcore phase** : **_stop moaning iruma PLEASE_**

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : _@won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented_ _it_ has been typing for awhile....

 **has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : i’m getting deja vu

 **piano fucker** : this better not be some kind of rant

 **won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it** : _@married to a male_ Is Chabashira-san. Even though we know Chabashira-san is attracted to females only, meaning she is a lesbian, because she has expressed so on multiple occasions, no one else but her calls others, mostly males, “degenerates” and so I have come to the conclusion that Chabashira-san is married to a man. Whether or not she gave consent or was forced into it is unknown and only she can tell.

**Mastermind changed married to a male to g,,,girls <3**

**g,,,girls <3**: TENKO CAN EXPLAIN

 **forgot the bottom outside overnight** : You don’t need to if you are uncomfortable.

 **g,,,girls <3**: tenko needs to!!!

 **piano fucker** : go ahead then chabashira-san!

 **g,,,girls <3**: tenko was in elementary school and a degenerate proposed!!

 **g,,,girls <3**: tenko didn’t know how horrible degenerates were then

 **g,,,girls <3**: tenko and him never divorced so technically tenko is married to a degenerate

 **g,,,girls <3**: but tenko is still a lesbian single!!!!

 **mr trust issues** : -and ready to mingle!

 **kinklandia** : -and rea

 **kinklandia** : FUCKIN DAMNIT YOU TWINK

 **junko’s wife and gf** : this chapter is getting long so author-chan is going to stop here!!

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : you really just obliterated the fourth wall huh

 **mr trust issues** : moooooommmm fix the fourth walll

 **Mastermind** : wow i need to do everything myself how boring

 **mr trust issues** : ew not you

 **junko’s wife and gf** : she’s a kamakura-san kinnie

**Mastermind ended chapter 8**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mastermind = Junko Enoshima
> 
> ? = Rantaro Amami  
> piano fucker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> ? = Ryoma Hoshi  
> ? = Kirumi Tojo  
> kami-sama kink: Angie Yonaga  
> g,,,girls <3 = Tenko Chabashira  
> ? = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> kinklandia = Miu Iruma  
> ? = Gonta Gokuhara  
> mr trust issues = Kokichi Ouma  
> ? = Kaito Momota  
> junko’s wife and gf = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> ? = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> ? = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> ? = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> dated the twink gremlin in middle school = ?  
> jumped off a tree while trying to fly = ?  
> has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone = ?  
> married to a male = Tenko Chabashira  
> had a crush on every guy in this gc = Kokichi Ouma  
> is the bottom = Miu Iruma  
> has a gf = ?  
> was romantically in love with a piano = Kaede Akamatsu  
> not a virgin = ?  
> won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it = ?  
> forgot the bottom outside overnight = ?  
> had a nightcore phase = ?  
> draws nsfw stuff of their classmates = Angie Yonaga  
> made out with a rock to practice kissing = ?  
> has a maki body pillow = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> never chokes gremlin again cuz he moaned 2 months ago = Maki Harukawa
> 
> (coschick = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> twink gremlin/gremlin = Kokichi Ouma)


	9. the game finally ends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i love junko 😳👉👈🥺😍😍🍎🍑🍑💦💦

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i will be changing all mentions of atua to “kami-sama”

**[10.57am]**

**worse than hell**

  
**junko’s wife and gf** : where did the chapter end last time?

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : tsumugi stop breaking the fourth wall

 **mr trust issues** : we know who yumeno-san is!!

 **g,,,girls <3**: a degenerate like you wouldn’t be able to know!!!!  
  
 **has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : _@has a gf_ is yumeno-san, right?

 **g,,,girls <3**: that can’t be yumeno-san!!

 **has a gf** : nyeah

 **g,,,girls <3**: oh.

**Mastermind changed has a gf to nyeah**

**Mastermind** : it’s so boooriiinnnngggg when you confess >:(((((

 **g,,,girls <3**: yumeno-san tenko thought you liked her too

 **nyeah** : too?

 **g,,,girls <3**: you went on dates with tenko

 **nyeah** : i thought they were platonic

 **nyeah** : sorry chabashira

 **nyeah** : nyeh

**g,,,girls <3 left worse than hell**

**nyeah** : did i do something wrong,,,,,

 **piano fucker** : you didn’t, don’t worry yumeno-san!!

 **piano fucker** : it was just a few misunderstandings :(

 **kami-sama kink** : angie will see how tenko is doing!

**kami-sama kink is offline**

**junko’s wife and gf** : i plainly suspected yonaga-san to just let her kami-sama deal with it

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : Yonaga-san has been trying to get closer to Chabashira-san for awhile now...

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : I wonder why that might be?

 **kinklandia** : they’re fucking

 **piano fucker** : that’s really inappropriate miu >:((

 **kinklandia** : i’ll show you inappropriate babe ;)

 **piano fucker** : _WJNEJDNEJDNEJDNEFNEIES_

 **mr trust issues** : ew

 **mr trust issues:** liking girls? couldn’t be me

 **kinklandia** : everyone knows you’re gay fucker

 **Mastermind** : especially your dearest ex ;)

 **Mastermind** : _@dated twink gremlin in middle school_ ;) ;) ;) ;)

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : no.

 **forgot the bottom outside overnight** : We should continue the game so we can get it over with quickly.

 **mr trust issues** : great idea mom!!

 **forgot the bottom outside overnight** :

 **mr trust issues** : :)

 **kinklandia** : YOU WERE THE ONE WHO LEFT ME OUTSIDE TO SLEEP?!?!?!

**Mastermind changed forgot the bottom outside overnight to mommy**

**mommy** : I apologize, Iruma-san.

 **mommy** : I faintly recall leaving you outside for a few minutes as punishment for something, but forgot you there.

 **kinklandia** : cuz of you i got a cold!!!!

 **mr trust issues** : and kayayday was there to take care of you

 **kinklandia** :

 **kinklandia** : i’m less mad

 **kinklandia** : BUT A GORGEOUS GIRL GENIUS NEEDS TO BE HEALTHY AT ALL TIMES

 **mr trust issues** : good thing you’re not gorgeous or a genius then

 **kinklamdia** : whore

 **mr trust issues** : skank

 **kinklandia** : twink

 **mr trust issues** : slut

 **kinklandia** : bottom

 **mr trust issues** : uno reverse bitch

 **kinklandia** : UNO REVERSE BACK AT YOU SHRIMP DICK

 **mommy** : Enoshima-san, though I greatly dislike you and wish to rip your head of and feed you to my 15 hungry children, I would like to request for you to mute these two.

 **mr trust issues** : aww you think i’m your child uwuwuwuwuwuwu

 **mommy** : *14 hungry children

 **kinklandia** : yeesss mommy hieayyyaaaAAAAAAAAA

 **had a nightcore phase** : _**STOP MOANING PLEASE I’M ON MY FUCKING KNEES**_

 **mommy** : *13 hungry children

 **Mastermind** : yh ok lol

**Mastermind muted kinklandia for 1 hour, reason: fuck you im his whore u3o**

**Mastermind muted mr trust issues for 20 minutes, reason: uwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuw**

**jumped off a tree while trying to fly** : guess we should continue???

 **had a nightcore phase** : the ones left are momota, gokuhara, amami, shinguji, saihara, kiibo and me

 **junko’s wife and gf** : _just degenerates!!!_

**nyeah is offline**

**mommy** : I was not aware you had a dislike for males as well, Shirogane-san.

 **junko’s wife and gf** : oh i dont

 **junko’s wife and gf** : i just typed what i think chbaashira-san would type now that she’s not here

 **ass ass in** : i cant believe you’e all this fucking dumb

 **jumped off a tree while trying to fly** : what’re are you talking abt harumaki-san???

 **ass ass in** : _|| the ones left are momota, gokuhara, amami, shinguji, saihara, kiibo and me_  
 _@had a nightcore phase_ cant you see the obvious?

 **has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : oh

 **jumped off a tree while trying to fly** : ????????

 **has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : _@had a nightcore phase_ is you, hoshi-kun, isn’t it?

 **had a nightcore phase** : guess i dug that hole for myself huh

**Mastermind changed had a nightcore phase to tennis murder**

**tennis murder** : you’ve still got ways to go kid

 **Mastermind** : _EXCUSE YOU_ im older >:((((((

 **Mastermind** : this is getting boring hurry up ùmú

 **junko’s wife and gf** : i guess we should start with easier ones

 **piano fucker** : do you know who _@has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone_ is?

 **junko’s wife and gf** : oh i think i might

 **won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it** : Please do tell us.

 **junko’s wife and gf** : sorry i got paid to not tell anyone :/

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : how much?

 **junko’s wife and gf** : ¥100 000 000

 **piano fucker** : wh

 **ass ass in** : then it must be someone rich

 **ass ass in** : saihara or amami

 **ass ass in** : don’t know about shinguji or kiibo and gokuhara grew up in the woods

 **ass ass in** : and _@jumped off a tree while trying to fly_ is kaito

 **jumped off a tree while trying to fly** : the luminary of the stars doesn’t jump off from trees!

**Mastermind changed jumped off a tree while trying to fly to space himbo**

**space himbo** : well uhh good job sidekick!!  
  
 **mr trust issues** : momo-chan tried to fly how cute

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : I’m sure he was just young at the time!

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : Around 4-6 maybe?

 **space himbo** : yeah!!

 **paino fucker** : i’m sorry momota-kun but it was last month

 **space himbo** : akamatsu-san!!!

 **piano fucker** : i saw him jump off a tree and called the ambulance

 **ass ass in** : so that’s how you broke your arm

 **space himbo** : ok fine but yumeno told me i could fly with a magic potion!!!

 **mommy** : Speaking of Yumeno-san, where is she?

 **junko’s wife and gf** : i think she went offline when i impersonated chabashira-san

 **mommy** : I will look for her.

**mommy is offline**

**junko’s wife and gf** : im sorry _@has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone_

 **piano fucker** : you finally gonna tell us weeb

 **piano fucker** : DCNNANu)shcnsuUyuw227snhssnw

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : Akamatsu-san?

 **piano fucker** : sorry that was miu

 **ass ass in** : why did you change your mind

 **junko’s wife and gf** : rantaro gave more money than they did

 **mr trust issues** : _GASP_

 **piano fucker** : but that means

 **has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone** : i’m Shuichi

**Mastermind changed has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone to not as sexy detective**

**not as a sexy detective** : ah

 **not as sexy detective** : this is in comparison to Kirigiri-senpai, right?

 **mr trust issues** : enoshitma is wrong >:((((

 **junko’s wife and gf** : that’s because you’re biased

 **space himbo** : sidekick?!?!?!

 **tennis murder** : still got ways to go, huh

 **ass ass in** : gross

 **piano fucker** : hey guys lets not bully shuichi

 **piano fucker** : liking cosplayers or being attracted to cosplayers isn’t weird, okay?

 **piano fucker** : i think cosplayers are sexy

 **junko’s wofe and gf** : it was kokichi’s photoshoot

 **mr trust issues** : wh

**mr trust issues is offline**

**not as sexy detective** : i made him uncomfortable,,

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : don’t worry, he’s happy  
  
 **not as sexy detective** : why would he be happy?

 **tennis player** : you’ve got ways to go

 **junko’s wife and gf** : oblivious....

 **Mastermind** : _@not a virgin @made out with a rock to practice kissing @won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it_ talk >:((((

 **not a virgin** : game still not over?

 **piano fucker** : well we can rule out him being gokuhara-kun ^^^

 **mr trust issues** : can we?

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : welcome back

 **junko’s wife and gf** : gokuhara plainly wouldn’t do anything like that! he’s too pure!!

 **mr trust issues** : yeah but he’s not a virgin

 **mr trust issues** : i would know ;)

 **ass ass in** : stop lying for attention

**Mastermind changed not a virgin to big dick**

**Mastermind** : good job kichi!! <3 <3

 **mr trust issues** : fuck off :)

 **paino fucker** : WHAT  
  
 **won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it** : How interesting....

 **junko’s wife and gf** : but gokuhara!!!!!

 **not as sexy detective** : i didn't really expect that,,

 **big dick** : gonta sorry he upset you

 **big dick** : but gonta not sorry he had fun with ex girlfriend

 **piano fucker** : we’re not mad at you

 **mr trust issues** : it’s stupid you need to reassure him of that

 **mr trust issues** : stop babying gokuhara

 **big dick** : gonta dumb but not child

 **big dick** : gonta not want to be treated like child

 **junko’s ass and tiddies** : we’re sorry gokuhara!!

 **junko’s wife and gf** : we plainly never thought about how you felt

 **piano fucker** : we’re really sorry!

 **piano fucker** : S in the chat if you’re sorry

 **piano fucker** : S

 **junko’s wife and gf** : S

 **not as sexy detective** : S

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : S

 **won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it** : S

 **ass ass in** : ......S

 **space himbo** : S

 **mr trust issues** : S

 **tennis murder** : S

 **made out with a rock to practice kissing** : S

 **piano fucker** : i’m sure the ones offline are sorry too

 **big dick** : it okay!

 **big dick** : gonta not angry!! :D

 **junko’s wife and gf** : even if gokuhara’s not as innocent as we thought we should keep him away from iruma-san

 **tennis murder** : agreed

 **piano fucker** : yeah

 **big dick** : gonta go back to looking at bugs!  
  
 **piano fucker** : don’t be out for too long

 **mr trust issues** : bye big guy

 **junko’s wife and gf** : his name and what you just typed don’t go well together

 **mr trust issues** : ;)

 **big dick** : ;D

**big dick is offline**

**junko’s wife and gf** : not good,,,,,,

 **not as sexy detective** : three more left to guess

 **ass ass in** : ouma can just tell us who _@dated twink gremlin in middle school_ is

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : no

 **mr trust issues** : no

 **piano fucker** : we’ll just have to guess then

 **not as sexy detective** : based on typing patter

 **ass ass in** : shuichi?

 **space himbo** : sidekick??

 **not as sexy detective** : i’ve been blackmailed into not sharing info sorry guys

 **junko’s wife and gf** : oh no the detective is off our team now

 **piano fucker** : iruma-san says that _@made out with a rock to practice kissing_ has to be kiibo because uhh

 **tennis murder** : because?

 **piano fucker** : “all the other virgins have been guessed”

**Mastermind changed made out with a rock to practice kissing to robot beep boop**

**robot beep boop** : This is incredibly robophobic!!!!

 **Mastermind** : sorry all i heard was beep boop robot

 **space himbo** : you actually kissed a rock?!?!

 **mr trust issues** : *made out with it using tongue for 10 minutes

 **robot beep boop** : You said you wouldn’t tell anybody, Ouma-kun!  
  
 **mr trust issues** : they already know -3-

 **robot beep boop** : I would appreciate it, if we never talked about this again.

**11 users reacted with :thumbs_up:**

**robot beep boop** : Thank you everyone online expect for Ouma and Enoshima-san.

 **mr trust issues** : >:T

 **piano fucker** : can the remaining two just confess?

 **won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented i** t: I would rather not.

 **dated twink gremlin in middle school** : same

 **ass ass in** : i just realized what shuichi was trying to type earlier

 **tennis murder** : do tell

 **ass ass in** : shinguji always types in proper grammar while amami never does

 **ass ass in** : _@won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it_ is shinguji while _@dated twink gremlin in middle school_ is amami

**Mastermind changed dated twink gremlin in middle school to avocado**

**Mastermind changed won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it to creep**

**avocado** : original

 **junko’s wife and gf** : you have a crush shunguji?? i’d plainly like to know who!!

**creep left worse than hell**

**junko’s wife and gf** : oh

 **piano fucker** : i didn’t know you used to date ouma-kun and amami-kun

 **mr trust issues** : i wonder why

 **junko’s wife and gf** : i’d plainly love to hear about your relationship

 **avocado** : it brings bad memories, i’d rather we don’t talk about it

 **ass ass in** : being in any kind of relationship with ouma must bring a lot of bad memories

 **mr trust issues** : what no way our relationship was amazing >:0

 **mr trust issues** : we had hot steamy se

 **junko’s wife and gf** : killed mid sentence

 **avocado** : anyway i’m going to bed this game took the whole day

 **tennis murder** : gn

 **piano fucker** : good night...

 **not as sexy detective** : good night,,

**14 users are offline**

**Mastermind** : how boring,,,,,

**Mastermind gave admin to mr trust issues**

**Mastermind left worse than hell**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mastermind = Junko Enoshima
> 
> avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> piano fucker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> tennis murder = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> kami-sama kink: Angie Yonaga  
> (g,,,girls <3 = Tenko Chabashira)  
> (creep = Korekiyo Shinguji)  
> kinklandia = Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> mr trust issues = Kokichi Ouma  
> space himbo = Kaito Momota  
> junko’s wife and gf = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> nyeah = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> not as sexy detective = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> dated the twink gremlin in middle school = Rantaro Amami  
> jumped off a tree while trying to fly = Kaito Momota  
> has photos from one of coschick’s photoshoots saved on their phone = Saihara Shuichi  
> married to a male = Tenko Chabashira  
> had a crush on every guy in this gc = Kokichi Ouma  
> is the bottom = Miu Iruma  
> has a gf = Himiko Yumeno  
> was romantically in love with a piano = Kaede Akamatsu  
> not a virgin = Gonta Gokuhara  
> won’t change their hair cuz their crush complimented it = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> forgot the bottom outside overnight = Kirumi Tojo  
> had a nightcore phase = Ryoma Hoshi  
> draws nsfw stuff of their classmates = Angie Yonaga  
> made out with a rock to practice kissing = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> has a maki body pillow = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> never chokes gremlin again cuz he moaned 2 months ago = Maki Harukawa


	10. i’ve disappointed the amaguji stans :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW? tsumugi and miu make rantaro and korekiyo uncomfortable while talking about their non-existent adult fun time life (also mentions of sex because miu)
> 
> anyway i’ll just tell you when the uncomfy bits start lol

**[6.04pm]**

  
**Kokichi Ouma created untitledchat2**

**Kokichi Ouma added Tsumugi Shirogane and Miu Iruma**

**Kokichi Ouma changed untitledchat2 to Mission Amaguji**

**Kokichi Ouma changed Kokichi Ouma to matchmaker**

**matchmaker** : we need to get them together

**Tsumugi Shirogane changed Tsumugi Shirogane to matchmaker 2**

**matchmaker 2** : shouldn’t you focus on your own relationship problems?

 **matchmaker** : whatever do you mean

 **matchmaker 2** : did you ever unblock him

 **matchmaker** : do you ever come up with original names

 **matchmaker 2** : >:(

 **Miu Iruma** : i got this shittygane  
  
 **matchmaker 2** : please no

**Miu Iruma changed matchmaker 2 to weeb stalker**

**matchmaker removed admin rights from weeb stalker**

**weeb stalker** : fuck you both

 **matchmaker** : ew im gay

 **Miu Iruma** : come over to my dorm then bby ;)

 **weeb stalker** : ew

 **weeb stalker** : im aro/ace miu

 **Miu Iruma** : worth a shot

**Miu Iruma changed Miu Iruma to hot babe**

**matchmaker changed hot babe to fat whore**

**fat whore changed matchmaker to twink slut**

**twink slut** : temporary peace?

 **fat whore** : temporary peace

 **twink slut** : we got sidetracked :((

 **fat whore** : the fuck are we supposed to do about those two virgins anyway

 **weeb stalker** : rantaro is not a virgin

 **twink slut** : and how do you know that

 **weeb stalker** : 

> **weeb** : we’re literally teenagers?? i hope we’re all virgins tf??
> 
> **Avocado Miami** :
> 
> **bitch bottom** :

**twink slut** : fair enough

 **fat whore** : WAIT YOU TWO FUCKED

 **twink slut** : all the time

 **fat whore** : AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME?!?!?!?!

 **weeb stalker** : even i’m not obsessed enough to ask about my ships’ sex life

 **twink slut** : yet asking them about everything else is fine

 **weeb stalker** : i’m working on that,,,,,,,,,

 **twink slut** : we keep getting sidetrackedddddd

_**!!!!UNCOMFY TIME STARTS HERE!!!!** _

**fat whore** : i just wanna know who tops i don’t care about the mushy shit

 **weeb stalke** r: it’s obv shinguji-kun

 **twink slut** : pfft no it’s taro-chan

 **fat whore** : dibs on rantaro

 **weeb stalker** : no way!!

**[6.15pm]**

**worse than hell**

**piano fucker changed piano fucker to piaNO**

**piaNO added Tenko Chabashira and Korekiyo Shinguji**

**piaNO changed Tenko Chabashira to girl enthusiast**

**piaNO changed Korekiyo Shinguji to gucci man**

**piaNO** : please tell me if you’re uncomfortable with the names i gave you!

 **mr trust issues** : wait when did you get admin

 **piaNO** : miu gave me!

 **mr trust issues** : and when did miu get admin...

 **hot gorgeous girl genius** : when you were sleeping i took your phone

 **mr trust issues** : ....

**mr trust issues removed admin from 2 users**

**mr trust issues gave admin to avocado**

**mr trust issues** : you’re the only one i can trust

 **hot gorgeous girl genius** : yh cuz you fucked

**avocado removed hot gorgeous girl genius from worse than hell**

**piaNO** : i-

 **girl enthusiast** : tenko likes the name, thank you akamatsu-san

 **piaNO** : are you feeling okay?

 **girl enthusiast** : tenko is fine.

 **Kami-sama kink** : Does Tenko want Kami-sama to come cheer her up??~~

 **girl enthusiast** : just angie is fine

 **Kami-sama kink** : Angie is coming then!!~~  
  
 **2 users are offline**

 **piaNO** : i hope their relationship works out!!

 **not as sexy detective** : ah same

**mr trust issues changed not as sexy detective to sexier detective**

**sexier detective** : a

**sexier detective is offline**

**space himbo** : why my sidekick all red

 **mr trust issues** : why my sidekick all red

 **ace himbo** : STFU OUMA

**mr trust issues changed space himbo to oompa-loompa**

**oompa-loompa** : i thought you gave up on that

 **mr trust issues** : never <3

**mr trust issues changed mr trust issues to sugar baby**

**sugar baby changed avocado to sugar daddy**

**piaNO** : too much info,,

**sugar baby added Miu Iruma to worse than hell**

**sugar baby changed Miu Iruma to small brain big ass**

**sugar baby gave admin rights to 2 users**

**sugar baby** : thin ice yall

 **sugar daddy** : yall

 **oompa-loompa** : yall

 **piaNO** : yall

 **sexier detective** : yall

**sugar baby has banned ‘yall’ from worse than hell**

**sugar baby** : :)

 **sugar daddy** : boo :(

 **piaNO** : why’s miu typing so furiously??

 **sugar baby** : they’re still having the argument???

 **piaNO** : what arguement?

 **small brain big ass** : NO YOU LISTEN YOU DUMB WEEB

 **junko’s wife and gf** : THERE’S NO WAY SHINGUJI-KUN IS A BOTTOM

 **small brain big ass** : HE’S A GIANT BOTTOM YOU SMALL TITTED GIRAFFE

 **junko’s wife and gf** : RANTARO IS A BOTTOM AND THAT’S FINAL

 **piaNO** : oh.

 **sexier detective** : im-

**sexier detective is offline**

**mommy** : sigh.

**mommy left worse than hell**

**gucci man** : This conversation is foolish, cease immediately.

 **small brain big ass** : KOKICHI SAID RANTARO ISN’T A BOTTOM SO CREEPGUCCI IS THE BOTTOM

**gucci man left worse than hell**

**piaNO** : he wasn’t here for even 20 minutes

 **sugar baby** : as entertaining as this is you shouldn’t talk about other peoples sex lives lol

 **sugar daddy** : the lol ruined it

 **junko’s wife and gf** : RANTARO JUST TELL THEM YOU’RE THE BOTTOM

 **small brain big ass** : NO TELL THEM YOU’RE THE TOP C’MON AVOCADO BRAIN

_**!!!!UNFOMFY ENDS HERE(?)!!!!** _

**sugar daddy** : im ✨uncomfy✨

 **sexier detective** : you shouldn’t talk about other people’s personal lives like that, iruma-san and shirogane-san

 **mommy** : Especially if they have expressed uncomfortableness and asked for you to stop.

 **junko’s wife and gf** : i’m so sorry i didn’t think about that

 **small brain big ass** : sorry or whatever...

 **sugar daddy** : eh it’s fine

**sugar baby added Korekiyo Shinguji**

**sugar baby changed Korekiyo Shinguji to pls don’t leave**

**sugar baby** : you’re gonna get a world record for leaving a gc y’know

 **pls don’t leave** : I’m glad.

 **sugar baby** : anyway there’s a fire in rantaro’s room have fun lol

 **sugar daddy** : wait wH A T

**sugar daddy is offline**

**pls don’t leave is offline**

**[3.00am]**

**worse than hell**

**sugar daddy** : me and kiyo are a couple now

 **small brain big ass** : fucking took you long enough

 **sugar baby** : congrats on taking forever btw

 **junko’s wide and gf** : hypocrite

 **sugar baby** :

> **weeb stalker** : even i’m not obsessed enough to ask about my ships’ sex life  
>   
> 

**junko’s wife and gf** : i-

 **junko’s wife and gf** : fair enough i’ll work on that too

 **piaNO** : congrats amami-kun and shinguji-kun!!!

 **pls don’t leave** : Thank you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> piaNO = Kaede Akamatsu  
> tennis murder = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> kami-sama kink: Angie Yonaga  
> girls enthusiast = Tenko Chabashira  
> pls don’t leave = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> small brain big ass, fat whore = Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> sugar baby, twink slut= Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko’s wife and gf, weeb stalker = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> nyeah = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> sexier detective = Shuichi Saihara


	11. whoa how has it been this long already i should keep track of time better holy-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW!!!! mentions of g!ns, h4r4ssment, v1ol3nc3 and an injured tenko :((
> 
> a serious chapter with angst? more likely than you think lol

**[1.23pm]**

**worse than hell**

**  
ass ass in** : is no one going to talk about the alleged fire that happened in amami-kun’s room?

 **robot beep boop** : Or the fact that Tojo-san left the group chat but was able to send messages in it without being added back.

 **junko’s wife and gf** : it’s just the author messing up

 **sugar daddy** : tsumugi we’ve talked about this there is no author

 **mommy** : Would you like for me to call your therapist again, Shirogane-san?

 **junko’s wife and gf** : yes please

**sugar baby changed junko’s wife and gf to blue sus**

**blue sus changed sugar baby to 3rd imposter**

**mommy** : I have managed to schedule an appointment with your therapist for today.

 **blue sus** : thank you tojo-san

 **blue sus** : you’re a life saver

 **piaNO** : tojo-san we need your help please come quick!

 **piaNO** : bring gonta and harukawa with you please

**piaNO sent an address**

**mommy** : I’m on my way.

**2 users have gone offline**

**pls dont leave** : What has happened?

 **kami-sama kink** : tenko hurt herself and we need an ambulance

 **robot beep boop** : Can’t either of you call an ambulance right now?

 **piaNO** : he’s still close by we cant talk

 **sugar baby** : he?

 **kami-sama kink** : there was a sinner harassing a woman so tenko saved her

 **piaNO** : he has a gun im scared

 **sugar daddy** : i’ll call the police

 **piaNO** : thank you

* * *

”You scared the shit out of me.”

”I know.” Akamatsu let out a shuddering breath, the sound of a gun firing and Chabashira’s scream still fresh in her mind.

”You should’ve been more careful.” Iruma’s angry and bitter words came from in front of her. The inventor walking back and forth through the small hallway.

”I know.” Akamatsu sighed.

”You could’ve gotten hurt!” Iruma yelled, quickly being quieted by Tojo.

”I’m sorry.” Akamatsu frowned.

”I could’ve lost you.” Tears welled up in Iruma’s eyes and she bitterly wiped them away.

”Geez, calm down Miu. No one died.” Ouma huffed from his seat in the hallway. There they were, class 69, outside of Chabashira’s hospital room, number 420.

”Shut the fuck up, failed abortion! You don’t care for anyone so you wouldn’t know how it feels like!” Iruma screams at the now blank-faced boy.

”Miu!” Akamatsu gets up from her seat, standing on shaky legs she reaches out to her girlfriend and pulls her into a hug. Iruma mumbles out apologies, crying onto the pianist.  
  
“It’s okay. Everyone’s fine. Chabashira-san will be okay.” Akamatsu reassures Iruma, praying to Yonaga’s god that the aikido master would truly be okay.

Speaking of Yonaga, where is she?

”You noticed too.” Ouma hums. It wasn’t a question, he knew she noticed.

”Where is Angie-san?” Kiibo looks around, not seeing the perky white haired girl.

”Probably with her girlfriend.” Ouma says in a bored tone despite the traumatizing events that occurred an hour ago.

“It would make sense for her to be with Chabashira-san, considering how close they’ve become after.... that game.” Tojo hums. Yumeno frowns at the mention of the game that broke hers and Chabashira’s friendship.

”We should let them talk.” Amami suggests and so class 69 stay outside the hospital room, comforting Akamatsu and Iruma.

Meanwhile, two girls are sitting in hospital room 420.

”Y-you _what_?!” Chabashira yells out, her face red.

”Angie said she loves you, Tenko! Even more than she loves Kami-sama!” Angie smiles, looking completely at ease, though the way her eyes flicked from object to object and her leg bounced in place, even rather un-observant people like Yumeno could tell she was nervous.

”But- why Tenko?!” Chabashira, hides her blushing face in her blanket, wincing from the pain in her shoulder from the movement.

”Because Kami-sama has deemed you worthy, Tenko! He would love for you to become Angie’s bride!” Angie’s smile wavers a bit as she holds Chabashira’s hands in her own.

”B-bride?! Wait- Tenko doesn’t want the approval of some degenerate!” Chabashira doesn’t mention the way Angie gets closer.

”Silly, Tenko! Kami-sama goes by all pronouns!” Angie giggles, her worry starting to disappear. The girls stare at each other for a moment before leaning in-

and being interrupted by the opening of the door. Chabashira, nearly screams, falling back onto the hospital bed, while Angie stays where she was.

”That was very rude, Doctor-san! Kami-sama will punish you for interrupting Angie’s kiss!” Yonaga smiles sweetly though her eyes darken.

”S-sorry.” The woman stutters. “I just came to see how Chabashira-san is doing.”

”Tenko is fine!” Tenko says, hiding her blush with her hands.

”That’s great! Could I check your-?”

”Angie does not like how you’re trying to flirt with her girlfriend!” Yonaga’s smile becomes smaller. She hugs Chabashira, pulling the girl close to her chest.

”G-girlfriend?! Angie wants to be Tenko’s girlfriend?!” Chabashira smiles, tears pricking her eyes as she jumps from the bed, hugging her new girlfriend close.  
  


“Of course Angie does!” Angie giggles. The two stare at each other for nearly a minute before starting to passionately make out.  
  


“I’ll just- uh, bye.” The doctor quickly leaves.

* * *

  
**piaNO** : we’re never going to get chabashira-san to warm up to males after today

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> piaNO = Kaede Akamatsu  
> tennis murder = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> kami-sama kink: Angie Yonaga  
> girls enthusiast = Tenko Chabashira  
> pls don’t leave = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> small brain big ass= Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> 3rd imposter = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> blue sus = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> nyeah = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> sexier detective = Shuichi Saihara


	12. i forgot a name for this uhhh-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you saw the unfinished chapter i accidentally posted: no you didnt <3

**[6.57pm]**

**worse than hell**

**  
piaNO** : guys we managed to convince chisa-sensei to let us host a halloween oarty

 **sugar daddy** : oarty

 **small brain big ass** : oarty

 **3rd imposter** : oarty

 **oompa-loompa** : oarty

 **blue sus** : oarty

 **ass ass in** : oarty

 **sexier detective** : oarty

 **robot beep boop** : oarty

 **nyeah** : oarty

**nyeah is offline**

**pls don’t leave** : oarty

 **kami-sama kink** : Oarty!!~~

 **girls enthusiast** : oarty

 **big dick** : oarty!!

**big dick is offline**

**mommy** :

> _guys we managed to convince chisa-sensei to let us host a halloween oarty_

I am glad she agreed.

 **blue sus** : wait chisa-sensei isn’t even our teacher

 **blue sus** : why do you need her permission??

 **ass ass in** : because a certain someone drives all our teachers to quit

 **piaNO** : *certain someones

 **robot beep boop** : Not to name any names but _@3rd imposter @small brain big ass @kami-sama kink @blue sus_

 **sugar daddy** : that is naming names

 **blue sus** : what no way!?!

 **blue sus** : i just ask them to model for me it’s not my fault blame kokichi!!

 **3rd imposter** : yh it’s my fault lol

 **kami-sama kink** : Angie just talks about Kami-sama and blood rituals!! It’s not Angie’s fault if Angie’s teachers are big pussies!!~~

 **small brain big ass** : did someone say pussy?!?!

 **sexier detective** : will the party be with just our class?

 **piaNO** : nope! 77 and 78 will be there too

 **mommy** : To.... “supervise”...

 **tennis murder** : i doubt any of them will supervise anyway

 **tennis murder** : they still got ways to go

 **kami-sama kink** : Ooh!! Angie will see her occult club again!!~~

 **3rd imposter** : wow do you talk to ghosts??

 **kami-sama kink** : Of course!!~~

 **3rd imposter** : _@oompa-loompa @oompa-loompa @oompa-loompa_

 **oompa-loompa** : SHUT THE FUCK UP GHOSTS AREN’T REAL

 **girl enthusiast** : are you caaling angie a liar degenerate?!?!?!

 **oompa-loompa** : I AM

 **girl enthusiast** : SQUARE UP B I T CH

**girl enthusiast is offline**

**oompa-loompa** : wai

**oompa-loompa is offline**

**3rd imposter** : rip momoron-chan gone too soon

 **kami-sama kink** : Say F to pay respects!!~~

 **3rd imposter** : F

 **small brain big ass** : F

 **sexier detective** : F

 **blue sus** : F

 **tennis murder** : F

 **mommy** : F

 **pls don’t leave** : F

 **robot beep boop** : F

 **ass ass in** : F......

 **sugar daddy** :

 **blue sus** : _don’t you fucking dare_

 **sugar daddy** : f

 **blue sus** : _**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!1!1!1!1!11!**_

**blue sus left worse than hell**

**piaNO** : im getting deja vu guys

**3rd imposter added Tsumugi Shirogane to worse than hell**

**3rd imposter changed Tsumugi Shirogane to press f to pay respects**

**press f to pay respects** : i hate you

 **3rd imposter** : luv you too <33

**3rd imposter gave admin rights to 1 user**

**press f to pay respects has banned 1 word**

**3rd imposter** : i swear to god-

 **kami-sama kink** : *Kami-sam!!~~

 **sugar daddy** : _[REDACTED]_

 **sugar daddy** : she banned lowercase F i cant-

**press f to pay respects changed press f to pay respects to frames you for murder cutely**

**frames you for murder cutely changed 3rd imposter to blocked his crush because i sent a confession for him**

**blocked his crush because i sent a confession for him has banned frames you for murder cutely from worse than hell**

**blocked his crush because i sent a confession for him** : oops my hand slipped

 **sexier detective** :

**sexier detective is offline**

**sugar daddy changed blocked his crush because i sent a confession for him to kimchi**

**kimchi** : are you making fun of the nickname i made for shumai to make fun of the nickname momoron-chan made for assassin-chan?

 **sugar daddy** : yes

**kimchi changed sexier detective to shumai**

**kimchi** : now we match!! <3

 **piaNO** : it’s getting late guys we should go to bed!!

 **sugar daddy** : one question

 **piaNO** : ?

 **sugar daddy** : why are you planning a halloween party on the 1st of october

 **mommy** : You can never be too prepared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> piaNO = Kaede Akamatsu  
> tennis murder = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> kami-sama kink: Angie Yonaga  
> girl enthusiast = Tenko Chabashira  
> pls don’t leave = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> small brain big ass= Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> ([blank] = Tsumugi Shirogane)  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> nyeah = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara


	13. tsumugi has pretty good questions actually

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> gonta never shows up in this chatfic im sorry i need to do better

**[11.23am]**   
  
**worse than hell**

  
**sugar daddy unbanned Tsumugi Shirogane from worse than hell**

**sugar daddy added Tsumugi Shirogane**

**piaNO** : did shirogane and ouma ever make up?

 **mommy:** I’m afraid not.

 **piaNO** : :(

 **small brain big ass** : that’s it im done

 **shumai** : you’re done??

 **small brain big ass** : wait do i have admin

**sugar daddy gave admin rights to 1 user**

**sugar daddy** : you do now

**small brain big ass removed admin rights from 1 user**

**kimchi** : wait wtf

 **kimchi** : this is my chat >:(

 **piaNO** : actually it’s mine

 **small brain big ass** : you virgins are gonna be friends again

 **small brain big ass** : the avocado won’t pay for my shit if yall dont make up

 **mommy** : And I was about to be proud of you for caring for your friends.

 **sugar daddy** : i wont buy you anything regardless

 **kimchi** : i’m not gonna be friends with a backstabber x2

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : i dont need friends anime will always be there for me

 **piaNO** : oh no they’re too stubborn

 **kami-sama kink** : Kami-sama says that Tsumugi should apologize to Kokichi!!~~

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : he was bullying me first!

 **tennis murder** : that’s really petty shirogane

 **girl enthusiast** : shirogane doesn’t gave anything to apologize for!!!!  
  
 **piaNO** : she broke ouma-kun’s trust :(

 **girl enthusiast** : but he’s a degenerate

 **ass ass in** : as much as i hate him, would gladly kill him and hate to be on his side

 **ass ass in** : shirogane is in the wrong

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : i

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : you’re right i was overreacting

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : im sorry kokichi

 **kimchi** : whatever its fine idc

**sugar daddy gave admin rights to 1 user**

**small brain big ass** : now lets go shopping sluts!!

 **kimchi** : no thanks im gonna hang out with momo-chan!!

 **oompa-loompa** : who the fucks momo-chan

 **pls dont leave** : It’s you, **Momo** ta-kun.

 **oompa-loompa** : what?! im not hanging out with ouma!!

**kimchi is offline**

**oompa-loompa** : WHATSJDNWJDHWJDHJDSDHFSL

**oompa-loompa is offline**

**robot beep boop** : I hope Momota-kun is okay.

 **ass ass in** : im sure he is

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : i know ouma still hasn’t forgiven me

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : what should i do so he’ll finally forgive me

**kimchi changed Tsumugi Shirogane to junko is waifu**

**junko is waifu** : i

 **piaNO** : why do all of shirogane-san’s names relate to enoshima-san???

 **kimchi** : i dont know

 **kimchi** : why don’t you tell them tsumugi :)

 **junko is waifu** : will you forgive me if i do

 **kimchi** : maybe

 **junko is waifu** : what if i tell it over the school speakers

 **kimchi** :

 **junko is waifu** :

 **kimchi** : youll get to level 20 friendship

 **junko is waifu** : deal

**[12.49pm]**

**Mono Family  
  
**

**sexy bear dad** : wtf are your students doing again

 **AWESOME NINJA** : its that junko fan girl this time!!!

 **dumb loli sister** : i heard she’s embarrassing herself for a friend!

 **dumb loli sister** : friendship is amazing!!

 **less attractive loli** : if i had to do that for friendship id have no friends

 **bearkuya topawmi** : you dont have any friends

 **less attractive loli** : respect your older sister suke >:(

 **toaster #2** : Class 79 is a mess, I don’t want to be associated with them.

 **the annoying blue one** : I GUT IT ON KAMRURA AGAN

 **bearkuya topawmi** : *got *camera *again

 **the annoying blue one** : _**cosplarergurlembarrs2020.mp4**_

 **less attractive loli** : what’s witth the 2020 all the tme?

 **bearkuya topawmi** : i hate this fucking family

 **toaster #2** : How are you even on the scene of the crime all the time?

 **sexy bear dad** : the girl was speaking through the school speakers like a dumbass

* * *

”Hello, Hope’s Peak Academy! I’m is Tsumugi Shirogane, the ultimate cosplayer from class 79. Please listen because I will only say this once.”

There’s odd banging in the background, as if someone was trying to get into the room Shirogane was in.

“Mostly because the principal is trying to break down the door. Anyway, I’m here today to tell you all that I ran a Junko Enoshima fanpage at the age of 14. I had 20 million followers and was verified! Suck on that, los _EEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH_!!” Shirogane screamed and then there was static.

* * *

**dumb loli sister** : uhm wasn’t she supposed to be embarrassed?

 **sexy bear dad** : monomi you dumb child

**[1.51pm]**

**worse than hell**   
  


**piaNO** : she actually did it im-

 **shumai** : i thought she’d be more embarrassed

 **small brain big ass** : who tf gets embarrassed about being verified

 **mommy** : She seemed rather embarrassed about the topic before.

kimchi: she had a body pillow of junko and had a shrine dedicated to her

 **junko is waifu** : NOO KOKICHI YOU SWORE YOU WOULDN’T TELL

 **junko is waifu** : _YOU SWOOOOORREEEE_

 **kimchi** : lmao get backstabbed, backstabber

 **small brain big ass** : are we finally gonna shop

 **sugar daddy** : sure

 **junko is waifu** : tune in next time to worse than hell drv3 chatfic!!

 **piaNO** : oh no she’s doing it again

 **junko is waifu** : will chabashira and yumeno finally get a chapter dedicated to them so they can become friends again?

 **junko is waifu** : will saiouma ever happen?

 **junko is waifu** : will amaguji ever make an appearance other than the chapter dedicated to them?

 **junko is waifu** : will chabashira ever warm up to males?

 **junko is waifu** : will what enoshima-san said to kokichi in the dms be answered

 **kimchi** : will you ever stfu

 **mommy** : I’m calling your therapist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> piaNO = Kaede Akamatsu  
> tennis murder = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> kami-sama kink: Angie Yonaga  
> girl enthusiast = Tenko Chabashira  
> pls don’t leave = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> small brain big ass= Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> nyeah = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> sexy bear dad = Monokuma  
> dumb loli sister = Monomi/Usami  
> the annoying blue one = Monokid  
> bearkuya topawmi = Monosuke  
> toaster #2 = Monodam  
> less attractive loli = Monophanie  
> AWESOME NINJA = Monotaro


	14. im so good at updating fics

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: cute lesbians (i never rlly shipped tenko and himiko until now o.o)

**[6.23pm]**

**worse than hell**

**  
junko is waifu** : psst guys

 **junko is waifu** : i think chabashira and yumeno are finally gonna make up

 **ass ass in** : finally

 **ass ass in** : it’s been way too long

 **piaNO** : guyyss lets leave them be

 **sugar daddy** : wait how would you know that shirogane

 **junko is waifu** :

 **junko is waifu** : ITS MIUS AND KOKICHIS FAULT

 **small brain big ass** : GOD FUCKING DAMNIT SAG-TITS

 **kami-sama kink** : *Kami-sama!!~~

 **kimchi** : THEY WEREN’T EVEN SUSPICIOUS OF YOU

 **junko is waifu:** YES THEY WERE

 **small brain big ass** : i knew we shouldn’t have let her in on the plan

 **mommy** : _What did you three do?_

 **nyeah** : LET ME OUT NYOW

 **girl enthusiast** : LET YUMENO OUT YOU DEGENERATE

 **piaNO** : ......

 **piaNO** : miu.

 **small brain big ass** : uh

 **kimchi** : _miu._

 **small** **brain big ass** : UH

 **small brain big ass** : FUCK I

 **piaNO** : what did you do miu?

 **small brain big ass** : WE LOCKED YUMENO AND CHABASHIRA IN A CLOSET

 **kimchi** : FUCKING

 **kimchi** : I SHOULDN’T HAVE TRUSTED YOU

**kimchi kicked small brain big ass and junko is waifu from worse than hell**

**kimchi left worse than hell**

**sugar daddy** : wow im the only admin now

 **shumai** : we should look for chabashira and yumeno so we can let them out

 **mommy** : let’s get going then

  
  


**[8.00pm]**

**magee lesbian — > stroongg lesbian**   
  


**magee lesbian** : i need to get out of the closet

 **stroongg lesbian** : tenko can break down the door!!

 **magee lesbian** : its metal

 **magee lesbian** : for some nyeason......

 **stroongg lesbian** : tenko can do it!!

 **magee lesbian** : youll break your legs

 **stroongg lesbian** : anything for yumeno!!

 **magee lesbian** : ..

 **stroongg lesbian** : did tenko say soemthing wrong???

 **stroongg lesbian** : *something

 **magee lesbian** : nyes

 **stroongg lesbian** : tennkoss sprry

* * *

Yumeno lists her from her phone to stare at Chabashira. She tries to desperately wipe tears from her face, breath coming out shakily and unevenly.

”Chabashira....?” Yumeno’s voice is meek, her vision blurring from tears.

She made Chabashira cry, she made chabashira cry, _she made chabashira cry, she made chabashiracryshemadechabashiacryshemadechabashirashemadechabashiracry **SHEMADECHABASHIRACRYSHEMADECHABASHIRACR**_

”T-tenko is so sorry, Yumeno. She ruins everything doesn’t she? Tenko’s just as bad as the degenerates.” Chabashira drops her phone, the only light source aside from Yumeno’s phone now on the ground.

”N-no, you’re not!” Yumeno yells louder than she thought she could. “Y-you’re really nice and strong and always make me feel confident in my abilities as a mage and I-“ Yumeno cries. “And all I did is make you sad again.”

“You’ve done more than that, Himiko! You’re an amazing mage and you don’t need Tenko to tell you that! Tenko took the hangouts the wrong way so it’s her fault!” Chabashira, grabs onto Yumeno’s hands and her phone falls to the floor, joining Chabashira’s.

”It’s not your fault, Tenko! I should’ve been more clear on what they were!” Yumeno intertwines their fingers.

It happens quickly. They’re holding hands, staring into each others eyes, and then suddenly they’re kissing.

It’s soft and it ends as quickly as it started but for Yumeno it felt like a lifetime. Chabashira opens her mouth-

-and the door swings open.

Light floods into the small closet. Chabashira and Yumeno jump away from each other quickly with a yelp.

”Ha! I knew they were fucking!” Iruma cackles.

”Tenkooo~! You could’ve at least invited your girlfriend if you were planning on fucking Himiko-chan!~” Yonaga smiles cheerily, wrapping Chabashira into a tight hug.

”Wha- Tenko wasn’t- She-” Chabashira splutters, her face red. “Tenko wouldn’t take advantage of Himiko like that!”

“ ‘Himiko’? I told you we should’ve installed cameras to see their romance blossom!” Shirogane cries, crumbling to the floor.  
  


* * *

**piaNO** : congrats chabashira angie and yumeno for your new relationship!!

 **kimchi** : wait what about yumenk’s gf

 **nyeah** : oh her

 **sugar daddy** : oh her??

 **sugar daddy** : you forgot abt your girlfriend??

 **nyeah** : yeah it was in 1st grade we never brokeup

 **shumai** : so you let chabashira think you had a girlfriend for 4 chapters because...?

 **girl enthusiast** : dont talk like that to himiko degenerate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**kimchi gave admin rights to 1 user**

**oompa-loompa** : wait when the fcuk were you added back and given admin

 **kimchi** : fcuk

 **sugar daddy** : fcuk

 **girl enthusiast** : fcuk

 **kami-sama kink** : Fcuk!!~~

 **ass ass in** : fcuk

 **oompa-loompa** : maki roll :((

 **mommy** : fcuk

 **pls dont leave** : fcuk

 **ass ass in** :

 **ass ass in** : anyone who sends another fcuk is dead

 **oompa-loompa** : i knew you love me!!! <333

 **shumai** : oh congrats on your relationship?

 **oompa-loompa** : we’re not dating???

 **piaNO** : you’re not??

 **oompa-loompa** : no

 **ass ass in** : ...

 **kimchi** : i know how you feel harumaki-chan

 **ass ass in** : i hate how i feel pity for you

 **kimchi** : we’re totally friends now

 **kimchi** : bonding over dumbasses who cant see the difference between flirting and threatening to kill them

 **mommy** : You make it specifically hard for him, Ouma-kun.

 **ass ass in** : he wouldn’t realize even if the brat was the most honest and straightforward perosn in the world

 **shumai** : who are you taliing aboit??

 **ass ass in** : see?

 **shumai** : ??

 **robot beep boop** : You should all got to sleep. I can see how tired you all are just from your typing.

 **kimchi** : what are you? my mom?

 **mommy** : He may not be but I am. Go to sleep.

 **kimchi** : ok mommmyyyyyy

**kimchi is offline**

**sugar daddy** : he loterally passed ojt on the floor

 **piaNO** : yeah we should sleep

 **my whore <3**: gn fucke-

 **my whore <3**: i-

 **tennis murder** : _**STOP MOANING IRUMA IM SOBBING I C A NT**_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> will kokichi and shuichi ever do the devils tango? who knows....... (i do)
> 
> sorry to all the tenko/himiko haters out there,,, tenko just needs more love (she’s best girl) <3
> 
> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> piaNO = Kaede Akamatsu  
> tennis murder = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> kami-sama kink: Angie Yonaga  
> girl enthusiast = Tenko Chabashira  
> pls don’t leave = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> my whore <3 = Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> nyeah = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara


	15. kaede is done with being ignored >:((

**[7.02am]**

**worse than hell**

**piaNO** : guys wanna have a sleepover??

 **piaNO** : _@everyone_

 **pls dont leave** : what.

 **piaNO** : uh sleepover..?

**pls dont leave has left worse than hell**

**piaNO** : i

 **kimchi** : sigh

 **kimchi** : and i even said please :(

 **sugar daddy** : dont worry about him

 **sugar daddy** : hes just a bit cranky when he’s woken up

 **kimchi** : doesnt he literally wake up at 4am everyday tho

 **shumai** : how do you know

 **kimchi** :

 **tennis murder** :

 **mommy** :

 **ass ass in** :

 **kimchi** : they’re onto us

**kimchi has deleted 1 message**

**kimchi** : lucky guess

 **sugar daddy** : he went to sleep at 5am

 **piaNO** : that’s 2 hours ago........

 **my whore <3**: wow i fucking wonder why he was awake fo so long

 **my whore <3**: _@ass ass in @mommy @tennis murder @kimchi_

 **tennis murder** : no idea

 **ass ass in** : _do you wanna die?_

 **mommy** : I don’t know.

 **kimchi** : are you jeeeaaaaaaloooouuussssss i wont spend time with you??~~

 **kimchi** : dont worry i loooveee you <3 <3 <3

 **my whore <3**: JNCEINDNCID

**my whore <3 is offline**

**kimchi** : oops

 **piaNO** : aww she’s so cute!

 **piaNO** : msjsksksksks i love her <3

 **kimchi** : ew stop being mushy on main

 **ass ass in** : hypocrite

**kimchi changed piaNO to useless bi**

**useless bi** : KKSJSJSKSJS STOPPP

**kimchi changed my whore <3 to distressed pan**

**kimchi** : lookkk couple names

 **junko is waifu** : like you and saihara?? ;))

 **shumai** : we’re not a couple

 **kimchi** : .

 **sugar daddy** : _sigh_

 **useless bi** : i think my name fits him better

 **shumai** : ?????

**kami-sama kink added Korekiyo Shinguji**

**kami-sama kink changed Korekiyo Shinguji to kiyo!!**

**oompa-loompa** : who tf gave her admin

**kami-sama kink changed 3 names**

**kimchi removed admin from 1 user**

**angel** : Awww!! Angie wanted to play around with the names more!!~~

 **angel** : *Kami-sama!!~~

 **junko is waifu** : angie you can want things

 **junko is waifu** : you aren’t just your god’s whatever you are

 **junko is waifu** : you’re angie and our friend

 **useless bi** : yeah!!! we all care about you angie!! <3

 **big dick** : angie gonta’s friend :D

 **angel** :

 **angel** : angie needs some time

**angel is offline**

**god is a woman** : which one of you degenerates made angie cry!!!

 **cute lil lesbean** : i think shes happy

 **cute lil lesbean** : so come back to beeddddd

 **god is a woman** : tenko needs to see if angie is ok!!!

**2 users are offline**

**kiyo!!** : Apologies for my rude exit, Akamatsu-san.

 **useless bi** : oh its fine!

 **useless bi** : it is still early

 **sugar daddy** : right so a sleepover?

 **useless bi** : yeah!!

 **distressed pan** : what are we gonna do there

 **junko is waifu** : no.

 **kimchi** : :)

 **junko is waifu** : **_no._**

 **distressed pan** : ;)

 **junko is waifu** : **_NOO_**

 **shumai** : shirogane are you okay??

 **sugar daddy** : shes still traumatized from the last sleepover we had

 **tennis murder** : and suddenly im too busy to come to the sleepover

 **ass ass in** : wow same

 **mommy** : I think my schedule might clear up when Ouma-kun and Iruma-san are uninvited.

 **distressed pan** : FUCK YEESS HATE ME MOKMYYYYYYY

 **tennis murder** : ~~_**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH**_~~

**tennis murder is offline**

**kimchi** : rip hoshi-kun always having to hear the dumb whore moan

 **kimchi** : f

 **junko is dead** : no not you too

 **sugar daddy** : f

 **junko is waifu** : NO

 **distressed pan** : f

**junko is waifu left worse than hell**

**robot beep boop** : Is this about capitalizing the letter ‘F’?

 **mommy** : I believe so.

 **useless bi** : i though she banned lower case f

 **kimchi** : i unbanned it

 **useless bi** : can we just talk abt the sleepover?

 **oompa-loompa** : what about the halloween oarty??

 **kimchi** : oarty

 **sugar daddy** : oarty

 **mommy** : oarty

 **useless bi** : oarty

 **shumai** : oarty

 **ass ass in** : continue and ill make sure your body is never found

 **big dick** : ryoma says oarty!!

 **ass ass in** : he can stay alive

 **kiyo!!** : May I ask why?

 **kimchi** : hoshi-chann totallyy wants to die so she tortures him by not allowing him to die

 **ass ass in** : my son will be sad

 **useless bi** : uhhh son???

 **big dick** : hi dad!!!

 **ass ass in** : <3

 **kimchi** : omg is momoron-chan the mom???

 **ass ass in** : do you wanna die?

 **big dick** : ryoma say yes :(

**distressed pan added Ryoma Hoshi**

**distressed pan changed Ryoma Hoshi to talln’t**

**distressed pan changed ass ass in to dad of 14**

**dad of 14** : _die_.

**kimchi changed dad of 14 to daddy**

**kimchi** : _@mommy @daddy_ couple names :)

 **big dick** : mom and dad!! :D

 **distressed pan** : FJFNUNEUFNEI€NIE YES

 **kimchi** : great minds think alike

 **distressed pan** : 🤝

 **kimchi** : 🤝

 **shumai** : kokichi and iruma together are scary

 **sugar daddy** : you get used to it

 **junko is waifu** : you get used it

 **sugar daddy** : eyy

 **junko is waifu** : eyyy

 **useless bi** : THE SLEEPOVERRR

 **distressed pan** : chill your t

 **kimchi** : killed mid sentence

 **kimchi** : rip

**distressed pan muted 14 users for 10 minutes, reason: stfu lemme talk**

**useless bi** : there we go

 **useless bi** : ok sooo

 **useless bi** : tomorrow night starts at 6pm

 **useless bi** : we’ll play games then watch a movie and sleep

 **useless bi** : mom, kiibo and i will take care of snacks!!

 **useless bi** : ***tojo-san

 **useless bi** : that’s all!!

 **useless bi** : remember attendance is mandatory and ill report you missing to the police if you dont come!!!

**useless bi if offline**

**[12.32am]**

**worse than hell  
  
**

**ass ass in** : is no one going to talk about how we somehow never go to school

 **mommy** : Just enjoy the silence for now.

 **ass ass in** : k

**5 users are offline**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> talln’t = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> angel = Angie Yonaga  
> god is a woman = Tenko Chabashira  
> kiyo!! = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> distressed pan = Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> cute lil lesbean = Himiko Yumeno  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara


	16. the matchmakers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i hate this chapter :/

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> love expert = Rantaro Amami  
> matchmaker 1 = Kaede Akamatsu  
> mother in-law = Kirumi Tojo  
> unvalid opinion 1 = Miu Iruma  
> dumb friend = Kaito Momota  
> matchmaker 2 = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> unvalid opinion 2 = Maki Harukawa

**[5.39pm]**

**the matchmakers (saiouma needs to get togetehr)**

**matchmaker 1** : and the plan begins

 **love expert** : you mean the sleepover

 **mother in-law** : I still do not understand the purpose of the sleepover.

 **matchmaker 2** : it’s to get saiouma together!!!!!!

 **unvalid opinion 2** : shuichi deserves better

 **matchmaker 2** : read your name

 **unvalid opinion 2** : _do you wanna die?_

 **dumb friend** : maki roll cmon

 **dumb friend** : shuichis been head over heels for ouma for like

 **dumb friend** : uhh

 **matchmaker 1** : ever since he met him

 **dumb friend** : ever since he met him!!

 **dumb friend** : WAIT WHAT?!?!?!

 **unvalid opinion 1** : BWAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA FR???!?!}!

 **love expert** : fr fr

 **matchmaker 2** : at least ouma took 3 months

 **unvalid opinion 1** : EVER SUNCE THEX MET?!?!?!?!?!}

 **unvalid opinion 2** : shuichi shouldn’t like an asshole like ouma

 **matchmaker 2** : miu where did you put the gun

 **unvalid opinion 1** : which one

 **matchmaker 2** : the pink one

 **unvalid opinion 1** : the gremlin nas it

 **mother in-law** : No guns allowed.

 **matchmaker 2** : but harukawa is being a bitch

 **dumb friend** : dont say that about maki roll!!!

 **mathcmaker 1** : _GASP_

 **love expert** : rip mugi ill pay for your funeral

 **mother in-law** : I’ll plan it.

 **unvalid opinion 1** : IJCRNCNRIFHURFURF HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHA YOUR DEAD JSJEJE

**unvalid opinion 2 is offline**

**matchmaker 2** : **_AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH_**

**matchmaker 2 is offline**

**matchmaker 1** : see you at rhe sleepover

**[6.57pm]**

**the matchmakers (saiouma needs to get togetehr)**

**matchmaker 1** : GAYS THIS IS AHHAAWH

 **love expert** : wow

 **mother in-law** : I did not expect to ever see Saihara-kun and Kokichi aggressively flirt while playing uno.

 **dumb friend** : holy fuck

 **matchmaker 2** : THE SEXUAL TENSION JS TOO MUCCCHHHHH

 **unvalid opinion 1** : i wouldnt’ be surpised jf they just started fucking right here in front of us

 **unvalid opinion 1** : itd be hot smsjsks aahhh

 **unvalid opinion 2** : _die_.

 **unvalid opinion 1** : yeess cho’e me momymyy aahayhahaahah

**love expert banned unvalid opinion 1**

**love expert changed unvalid opinion 2 to unvalid opinion**

**mother in-law** : Thank you for removing her.

 **love expert** : np 

**matchmaker 1** : :(

 **matchmaker 2:** we get is shes your girlfriend

 **love expert** : but shes not immune to bans

 **matchmaker 1** : :(((

 **dumb friend** : oh hey my sidekick won!!

 **love expert** : wait really

**[7.23pm]**

**worse than hell**

**distressed pan** : _@useless bi @sugar daddy @mommy @oompa-loompa @daddy @junko is waifu_

 **distressed pan** : unban me assholes

 **sugar daddy** : no

 **oompa-loompa** : fuck no

 **daddy** : _go die_

 **mommy** : No.

 **junko is waifu** : nope!!!

 **useless bi** : nope sorry <3

 **kimchi** : you have a secret group chat???

 **kimchi** : i wanna join i wanna join i wanna joinnn

 **sugar daddy** : no

 **oompa-loompa** : fuck no

 **daddy** : _go die_

 **mommy** : No.

 **junko is waifu** : nope!!!

 **useless bi** : nope sorry

 **junko is waifu** : sooooooooo how did that uno match goo??

 **shumai** : you were watching?

 **kimchi** : ew stalker

 **angel** : Ooh!! Kami-sama says Tsumugi has a plan!!~~

 **junko is waifu** : what noooooo

 **junko is waifu** : let’s play truth or dare

 **distressed pan** : seems like the perfect time to test out my lie detector that works through text

 **kimchi** :

**[7.59pm]**

**strip club**

  
**pole dancer** : i know what youre trying to do stop it right now

 **the bartender** : what do you mean haha

 **stripper** : no idea what you’re talking about

 **a regular** : YOU AND SHITHARA NEED TO FUCK ALREADY

 **the bartender** : god damn it

 **stripper** : miu why

 **pole dancer** : try anything and ill expose you all

 **a regular** : ha as if you twink

 **the bartender** : there’s no way you’d know anything about harukawa akamatsu and momota

 **pole dancer** : they’re in on it too huh

 **stripper** : youre ruining the plan guys

 **the bartender** : its fine he cant do anything

 **stripper** : _sigh_

**[8.19pm]**

**worse than hell**

**distressed pan added PUSSY DETECTOR 69**

**useless bi** : why

 **shumai** : what is that

 **distressed pan** : its the lie detector

 **distressed pan** : no need to thank me ;)

 **sugar daddy** : we wont

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _TRUTH_

 **distressed pan** : :(

 **kimchi** : ew ur ugly

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _LIE_

 **kimchi** :

 **distressed pan** : FUCK YEAHHHH YOU BTICH

 **distressed pan** : I KNEW YOU THINK IM HOT

 **kimchi** : youre not

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _TRUTH_

 **distressed pan** :

 **kimchi** : whore :)

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _LIE_

 **useless bi** : is there any way to turn it off or make it only detect sentences we want

 **junko is waifu** : im sure the author can make sure it doesn’t detect every single text we send

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _TRUTH_

 **useless b** i: i-

 **useless bi** : ok

 **distressed pan** : ill start

 **distressed pan** : t or d shrimp cock

 **kimchi** : dare im not a pussy

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _LIE_

 **kimchi** : FUCK OFF

 **distressed pan** : JNDISNDINDJSJDINWD AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

 **sugar daddy** : dont worry kichi everyone already knows youre a pussy

 **kimchi** : im going to fucking ban you

 **dugar saddy** : you wont

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _TRUTH_

 **kimchi** : no its not

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _LIE_

 **shumai** : lets just continue the game....

 **junko is waifu** : wait where’s everyone else

 **mommy** : Watching a movie.

 **useless bi** : no one wants to play truth or dare? :(

 **mommy** : Yes.

**mommy is offline**

**useless bi** : ouch

 **shumai** : im going to leave

 **junko is waifu** : no you’re not

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _TRUTH_

 **shumai** : ..

 **distressed pan** : _@kimchi_ choose truth

 **kimchi** : no

 **distressed pan** : ill be your slave for a week

 **kimchi** : ew gross youd be into that

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _TRUTH_

 **kimchi** : see? 

**sugar daddy** : ill convince tojo to let you drink panta during breakfast and dinner

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _TRUTH_

 **kimchi** : i pick truth

 **distressed pan** : do you like shithara romantically

 **kimchi** :

**kimchi is offline**

**distressed pan** : GET BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT

**distressed pan is offline**

**mommy** : I suggest we all just go to bed.

 **useless b** i: yeah...

 **junko is waifu** : mission saiouma is a fail

 **PUSSY DETECTOR 69** : _LIE_

**sugar daddy removed PUSSY DETECTOR 69  
**

**junko is waifu** : WAIT WHAT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> talln’t = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> angel = Angie Yonaga  
> god is a woman = Tenko Chabashira  
> kiyo!! = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> distressed pan = Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> cute lil lesbean = Himiko Yumeno  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> strip club
> 
> stripper = Rantaro Amami  
> a regular = Miu Iruma  
> pole dancer = Kokichi Ouma  
> the bartender = Tsumugi Shirogane


	17. the kaimaki chapter everyone’s been waiting forrrrr

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> platonic (and romantic) kaemaki (kaede/maki) is just <3 <3 <3

**[9.11am]**

**mr. knifey — > mrs. knifey**

**mr. knifey** : i need your help kaede

 **mrs. knifey** : what do you need harukawa??

 **mr. knife** y: i want to confess to kaito

 **mrs. knife** y:

 **mrs. knifey** :

 **mr knifey** : kaede??

 **mrs knifey** : sorry sorry

 **mrs. knifey** : just-

 **mrs. knifey** : i thought this day would never come!!!

 **mr. knifey** : just help me already

  
**[9.15am]**

**kaimaki is a go**   
  


**matchmaker** : GUYSSSS

 **date planner** : what happened?

 **matchmaker** : SHUICHI YOU WONT BELIEVE THISSS

 **boyfriend free pass** : whaaaaattt kayayday tell usss

 **mowommy** : Did something happen between Momota-kun and Harukawa-san?

 **matchmaker** : YESS

**matchmaker added Maki Harukawa**

**matchmaker changed Maki Harukawa to victim**

**victim** : what is this

 **matchmaker** : HARUKAWA IS PLANNING ON ASKING MOMOTA OUT

 **boyfriend free pass** : finally

 **mowommy** : You have no room to talk, Kokichi.

 **victim** : you have this for us too?

 **date planner** : wait too??

 **mowommy** : Akamatsu has created multiple chats for this kind of stuff.

 **mowommy** : I’m in most of them, though I fear the ones I’m not in.

 **boyfriend free pass** : you should

 **matchmaker** : GUYS WE NEED TO HELP THEM GET TOGETHER

 **victim** : im regretting this already

 **boyfriend free pass** : good :)

 **victim** : ew a brat

 **mowommy** : What have you planned for the date so far?

 **victim** : it’s going to be at night on the roof

 **date planner** : so you’ll confess while stargazing?

 **victim** : yeah

 **boyfriend free pass** : but do you know how to ask him out

 **victim** :

 **matchmaker** : don’t worry harukawa! we’ll help you!!

 **victim** : you can just call me maki

 **matchmaker** :

 **matchmaker** : o///o

 **date planner** : you have a girlfriend kaede

 **matchmaker** : shudduuupppp

 **boyfriend free pass** : wow cheating on the whore?

 **boyfriend free pass** : im snitching

 **victim** : she’d probably be turned on by that too

 **boyfriend free pass** : ew youre right

 **matchmaker** : back on track everyone!!

 **mowommy** : I suggest to make it sweet and simple, so Momota-kun can’t mistake it for platonic love.

 **victim** : _LoVE?!?!_

 **boyfriend free pass** : _**kaimakiconfessionmakispart.docx**_

 **victim** : why the hell did you even write that

 **boyfriend free pass** : ew no tsumugi wrote that

 **matchmaker** : im gonna read it

 **matchmaker** : it might be good

 **mowommy** : I read it already.

 **date planner** : how??

 **date planner** : its only been a few minutes and that’s like 20 pages long

 **mowommy** : Shirogane has shown it to me before.

 **matchmaker** : oh that makes sense

 **mowommy** : I think page 4’s confession would fit.

 **victim** : ill use it

 **mowommy** : I wish you luck.

 **victim** : thanks

**victim left kaimaki is a go**

**boyfriend free pass** : wayany i totally snitched to momo-chan

 **matchmaker** : why would you do that?!?!

 **boyfriend free pass** : calm your tiddies kayayday he didnt believe me

 **matchmaker** : i don’t think we’re close enough for first name basis...

 **boyfriend free pass** : whaattt?!?! i thought we were besties :(

 **mowommy** : Please stop crying, Kokichi. I’m trying to focus on making late breakfast.

 **matchmaker** : oh sorry ouma, i guess we are kind of close

 **matchmaker** : uh *kokichi

 **boyfriend free pass** : yayy!!! love you kayayday <33

 **matchmaker** : ..you too ouma <3

 **matchmaker** : *kokichi

**boyfriend free pass is offline**

**matchmaker** : ill never get used to calling him by first name

 **date planner** : it took me a while too

 **mowommy** : Akamatsu-san, could you help me with breakfast?

 **matchmaker** : of course!!

**matchmaker and mowommy are offline**

**date planner** : im alone

**date planner is offline**

  
**[11.4m]**

**maki roll <3 —> space himbo <3**

**maki roll <3**: i had fun

 **space himbo <3**: me too

 **space himbo <3**: im surprised you actually asked me out i thought he was lying

 **maki roll <3**: he? do you mean ouma?

 **space himbo <3**: yeah

 **maki roll <3**: what did he tell you

 **space himbo <3**: that you were gonna ask me out

 **maki roll <3**: nothing else?

 **space himbo <3**: nah, it came out of the blue too

 **maki roll <3**: whatever i dont want to talk about him

 **space himbo <3**: hey wanna come over to my dorm

 **maki roll <3**: are you scared

 **space himbo <3**: IM nOT SCARED

 **maki roll <3**: was it shinguji ouma or angie

 **space himbo <3**: im not scared..

 **maki roll <3**: then i wont come over

 **space himbo <3**: it was all of them!!

 **maki roll <3**: im at your door

 **space himbo <3**: thanks for coming

 **maki roll <3**: yeah whatever

 **space himbo <3**: gn <3

 **maki roll <3**: .....

 **maki roll <3**: .....<3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope that was good enough, im not rlly good with writing maki or kaito ^^’  
> i think i might do gonta x ryoma at some point, but what are other ships you’d like?   
> you can ship any v3 character with dr2 or 1 characters too (they’re all around the same age in this fic)
> 
> mrs. knifey, matchmaker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> mowommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> boyfriend free pass = Kokichi Ouma  
> space himbo <3 = Kaito Momota  
> mr knifey, victim, maki roll <3 = Maki Harukawa  
> date planner = Shuichi Saihara


	18. kokichi’s following in the footsteps of the mastermind before him- oh wait,, hes not the mastermind?? wha- why does the script say he is? wait lemme read it again- HE WAS LYING?!?!?! HOLY FU-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW! mentions of gore, mentions of cooking human meat, mentions of cannibalism, mentions of shoving stuff up someone’s ass, mentions of stabbing, death threats (not just maki surprisingly)

**[5.29pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**kimchi** : let’s play a game!!!

 **useless bi** : EVERYONE TAKE COVER

 **mommy** : I shall get rid of the parasite!

 **sugar daddy** : give us kokichi back enoshima!!

 **kimchi** :

 **kiyo!!** : I believe this is an act of trauma from the previous game we participated in while in this group chat.

 **kimchi** : geeeeezzz its me kokichi

 **distressed pan** : tell us something only the peeled grape would know

 **kimchi** : peeled grape??

 **kimchi** : cant you come up eith better nicknames you slutty cum filled whore

 **distressed pan** : HIYEAAAAAAAAAAA YESSS KOKICHIII ANSHAHAH

 **talln’t** : _**STOP**_

 **useless bi** : ...........ok so its the real kokichi

 **god is a woman** : when did you and the degenerates get on first name basis?!?!?!??!!?!?!?!!

 **kimchi** : 2 years ago

 **useless bi** : yesterday

 **cute lil lesbean** : i think ouma might be lying

 **talln’t** : might?

 **shumai** : what game do you want to play kokichi?

 **kimchi** : im glad you asked beloved!

 **kimchi** : im going to send something youve all said or something from your search history

 **kimchi** : and youll have to guess who said it/searched it

 **distressed pan** : sounds fucking horrible

 **distressed pan** : lets fucking do it

 **talln’t** : no

 **mommy** : No.

 **kiyo!!** : No.

 **robot beep boop** : No thank you.

 **shumai** : no

 **useless bi** : no sorry

 **angel** : Kami-sama says no!!~~

 **god is a woman** : definitely not!!

 **cute lil lesbean** : sounds like a pain

 **sugar daddy** : nope

 **big dick** : gonta busy :(

 **oompa-loompa** : fuck no

 **daddy** : do you wanna die

 **junko is waifu** : im busy watching anime

 **kimchi** : too bad you dont have a choice

 **distressed pan** : im done

 **useless bi** : _WHAT_

 **mommy** : Please unlock my door, Iruma-san and Kokichi.

 **mommy** : I need to cook dinner.

 **kimchi** : if you play my game

 **junko is waifu** : as if! im plainly happy in my dorm

 **distressed pan** : not anymore weeb

 **junko is waifu** : WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY LAPTOP

 **kimchi** : just some adjustments

 **junko is waifu** : IT WONT TURN ON HOW WILL I WATCH ANIME

 **shumai** : on your phone....?

 **junko is waifu** : oh right

 **junko is waifu** :

 **junko is waifu** :

 **junko is waifu** : I CAN’T EXIT THE APP

 **useless bi** : i cant either!

 **kiyo!!** : It seems like we have to play this game or we won’t be able to do anything else.

 **cute lil lesbean** : we can sleep

 **kimchi** : ill remove your bed

 **god is a woman** : HOW DARE YOU DEGENERATE

 **cute lil lesbean** : im playing

 **kimchi** : great!! lets start

 **kimchi** : “If you don’t stop, I’ll break your ‘nico nico’ kneecaps.”

 **mommy** : This is...

 **distressed pan** : EEIDHEIDEIDJWI; AAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAABJASUWHSUWU

 **useless bi** : did you say that shirogane??

 **junko is waifu** : someone as plain as me could have never said something like that

 **sugar daddy** : a simple no could’ve worked too

 **shumai** :

 **talln’t** : turn off your detective now

 **shumai** : im sorry hoshi-kun....

 **junko is waifu** : i remember who said that now!!

 **shumai** : does everyone remember what hoshi’s first name in this chat was

 **useless bi** : nico nico kneecaps....

 **big dick** : gonta remember that!!

 **distressed pan** : HOLY FUCK DJENDJENDEUNDSJJAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

 **mommy** : We finally get an explanation for that odd name.

 **kiyo!!** : 18 chapters too late

 **useless bi** : you too shinguji???

 **junko is waifu** : it’s contagious

 **sugar daddy** : why would hoshi even say that

 **junko is waifu** : well it plainly wasnt my fault

 **kimchi** : suspicious

 **distressed pan** : you were there just tell us you brat

 **kimchi** : shirogane was trying to get hoshi to say nicolas onii-chan or something similar

 **junko is waifu** : ITS NICO NICO NII YOU UNCULTURED NORMIE

 **useless bi** : lets just move on...

 **kimchi** : ok!! ka-yay to the day!!!

 **useless bi** : wh

 **kimchi** : “I will stab you until your organs spill all over the floor, freeze your intestines, cook your meat, force feed it to your family and then shove your bones so far up your fucking ass, you’ll be shitting blood and bones for days.”

 **cute lil lesbean** : im scared..

 **god is a woman** : WHICH DEGENERATE SAID THIS

 **robot beep boop** : this is... unnecessarily violent..

 **kiyo!!** : ah

 **sugar daddy** : something wrong, beautiful?

 **kiyo!!** : not at all

 **shumai** : i’ve seen that method be used for murder before

 **distressed pan** : what the actual fuck saiwhore

 **useless bi** : well now we know one of us a killer

 **kimchi** : a serial killer!!

 **kiyo!!** : It was only 92 kills, Kokichi, I hardly count as a serial killer.

 **distressed pan** :

 **useless bi** :

 **cute lil lesbean** :

 **big dick** : shinguji kill cereal?

 **shumai** : i cant believe im going to arrest one of my classmates

 **sugar daddy** : its just a weird joke they have

 **sugar daddy** : kiyo isnt actually a serial killer

 **sugar daddy** : _~~hopefully~~_

 **distressed pan** : coulda fooled me

 **useless bi** : miu....

**distressed pan changed kiyo!! to korky killer**

**oompa-loompa** : what the actual fuck iruma

 **korky killer** : Everyday I lose more faith in humanity.

 **junko is waifu** : just like pregame akamatsu!!

 **useless bi** : pregame???

 **useless bi** : like before this game or enohimas?

 **junko is waifu** : before theemdkemdekmdiemdkekekek

 **kimchi** : next !!

 **talln’t** : did you just murder shirogane

 **kimchi** : “hello google, how are you? im fine today, thank you for asking.”

 **kimchi** : this is from someone’s search history

 **cute lil lesbean** : was someone talking to google......???

 **kimchi** : they were having conversations with google for 3 months

 **useless bi** :

 **robot beep boop** :

 **junko is waifu** : i think i heard about this one

 **sugar daddy** : wasn’t this because of the prank kokichi and akamatsu did

 **distressed pan** : _YOU_ pranked someone?!

 **useless bi** : ........oops?

 **korky killer** : Then whoever was speaking with google is incredibly gullible.

 **sugar daddy** : so kiibo, gonta, yumeno, chabashira or momota

 **god is a woman** : im not gullible you degenerate!!!!

 **god is a woma** n: and neither is himiko!!!

 **talln’t** : if a girl is involved you’d do anything

 **oompa-loompa** : its kiibo

 **robot beep boop** : what NO!! D:<

 **daddy** : and how do you know this kaito

 **oompa-loompa** : ouma told me last week

 **mommy** : Why would he tell you about a prank?

 **oompa-loompa** :

 **kimchi** :

 **kimchi** : wow good job momo-chan!  
  
 **kimchi** : time for the next one!!

 **distressed pan** : dont change the fucking subject!!

 **kimchi** : “I burnt my toaster on my waffles”

 **useless bi** : how

 **mommy** : Is this how the toaster exploded?

 **distressed pan** : i told you noot to change the subject flat ass!!

 **kimchi** : at least my flat ass gets more dick than you do

 **shumai** : its not flat

 **useless bi** : i-

 **talln’t** : _**iruma i will fucking murder you stop moaning.**_

 **distressed pan** : is that a promise? hahshhhyuyyisjhwhwwhhwwhw

 **talln’t** : _fuck this_

 **big dick** : hoshi okay? :(

 **robot beep boop** : I believe he may have thrown his phone at the wall.

 **mommy** : Kokichi, may I have permission to not participate?

 **mommy** : I need to get dinner ready and buy Hoshi-kun a new phone.

 **kimchi** : fiiiiinnneeeeeeeeee

 **mommy** : Thank you.

**mommy is offline**

**kimchi** : anyway gess who it is alreaaddyyyyyyyy

 **shumai** : its kaito

 **daddy** : without a doubt

 **oompa-loompa** : hey!

 **junko is waifu** : how did you manage to burn a toaster with a waffle

 **cute lil lesbean** : even im nit that bad

 **oompa-loompa** : is just happened!!

 **kimchi** : im getting bored of this game :((

**mastermind added mastermind to worse than hell**

**kimchi** : ew

 **mastermind** : did someone say despair?~

 **robot beep boop** : No one did.

 **useless bi** : that probably wasn’t supposed to happen huh

 **distressed pan** : NO!!

 **distressed pan** : how the fuck does a brainless skank like you hack into my app?!?!?!

 **mastermind** : magic ;)

 **cute lil lesbean** : i cant sense a magical aura from you so youre lying!!

 **mastermind** : fine with the power of god

 **angel** : Kami-sama says that no God would ever help you!!~~

 **mastermind** : satan >:/

 **kimchi** : nope hes my bitch

 **mastermind** : geez fine i know the ultimate hacker

 **mastermind** : nooowww

 **mastermind** : you were playing a game without me??~

 **kimchi** : yupp!!

 **kimchi** : and were doing just fine before you came!

 **mastermind** : so meaannnnn

 **mastermind** : i feel so despairingly depressed by your cruel words

 **useless bi** : good

 **distressed pan** : wow thtas hot hehehejjehheeh

 **mastermind** : I’LL SHOW YOU ALL A REAL FUCKING GAME HA!!

 **robot beep boop** : We refuse to participate.

 **mastermind** : you won’t ;D

 **sugar daddy** : what makes you so sure?

 **mastermind** : you’ll find out soon enough!

**kimchi banned mastermind from worse than hell**

**god is a woman** : mildly good job degenerate!!

 **kimchi** : what happened to wlw mlm solidarity :(

 **god is a woman** : .....

 **god is a woman** : mildly good job _half_ degenerate....

 **useless bi** : im so proud tenko!!

 **god is a woman** : JSIDHWISJWISJWISJWISJIAL

 **angel** : It’s the gay panic!!~~

 **distressed pan** : back off!!

 **distressed pan** : go fuck your own girlfriends!!

 **god is a woman** : t-t-tenko?!?!

 **useless bi** : i think we’re close enough to be on first name basis!!

 **useless bi** : is that ok with you?

 **god is a woman** : of course akamatsu!!!

 **god is a woman** : ***kaede!!!!

 **cute lil lesbean** : .....

**cute lil lesbean is offline**

**god is a woman** : oh no himiko!!

**god is a woman is offline  
**

**angel** : Bye bye, friends!!~~

**angel is offline**

**useelsss bi** : bye everyone!

**All users are offline**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “I burnt my toaster on my waffles” by SfrogPlus
> 
> sugar daddy = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> talln’t = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> angel = Angie Yonaga  
> god is a woman = Tenko Chabashira  
> korky killer = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> distressed pan = Miu Iruma  
> big dick = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> cute lil lesbean = Himiko Yumeno  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara


	19. kokichi is a little shit! but what’s new?

**[7.14am]**

**phantom thief — > detective**

**phantom thief** : eewwwwwww

 **detective** : what?

 **phantom thief** : taro-chan and kiyo are being all couple-y grosss

 **detective** : well they _are_ a couple

 **phantom thief** : we need to out couple them

 **detective** : why

 **phantom thief** : because i said so

 **detective** : no

 **detective** : i want to sleep

 **phantom thief** : cmon pleeeeeaaaaaaaaaseeeeeeee

 **phantom thief** : ill be all yours all night if you agree

 **detective** : isn’t it a bit too early for that

 **phantom thief** : it’s never too early ;)

 **detective** : fine you’ve convinced me

 **phantom thief** : yess!!! <3

**[7.39am]**

**worse than hell**

**mommy** : What are Shinguji-kun, Amami-kun, Kokichi and Saihara-kun doing?

 **useless bi** : WHEN DID SHUICHI AND KOKICHI BECOME A COUPLE

 **useless bi** : @shumai @shumai @shumai

 **useless bi** : SHUICHI

 **shumai** : im busy

**shumai is offline**

**useless bi** : SHUICHI YOU-

 **useless bi** : _AAAAAAAAHHH_

* * *

_(7.20am)_

  
  
“What are you doing?” Amami’s hand is on his boyfriend’s waist while said boyfriend, Shinguji, is resting his head on Amami’s shoulder. Shinguji is reading a book about past European beliefs and religions.

“Out couple-ing you!” Ouma is sitting on Saihara’s lap, said detective having his arms wrapped around Ouma’s waist and resting his head on Ouma’s shoulder. Saihara looks half-asleep.

”That’s not a word.” Shinguji says.

”I made it a word!” Ouma huffs in annoyance.

”What do you even mean by ‘out couple-ing’ us?” Amami skims over some words in the book Shinguji is reading but directs his attention back to the short boy when nothing interests him.

”We’re totally a better couple!” Ouma grins, kissing Saihara on the cheek for emphasis.

”Are you two dating?” Shinguji looks up looks up from his book.

”No.” Saihara and Ouma answered at the same time.

”I can’t even tell if you’re lying.” Amami sighs.

”We’ve proved our point, Kokichi, can I go back to sleep now?” Ouma doesn’t get to answer before Amami moves Shinguji onto his lap, wrapping his arms around Shinguji’s waist and kissing the back of his neck. He then smiles at the other couple.

”Oh you’re on!”   
  


And so started the game of out couple-ing each other. They’d turn everything romantic. From feeding your partner during lunch to helping them pick up a fallen pen. The whole game Saihara and Ouma would deny being a couple and the smaller of the two would always make a different lie on why they were acting like a couple, the lies becoming crazier and more unbelievable as they went on. It was 9pm, and they were still going..

until...  
  


“Enough! I can’t do this anymore!” A red-faced Shinguji nearly yelled.

”Are you okay, angel?” The two couples were now in their dorm’s lounge area, Saihara’s head resting on Ouma’s lap while Shinguji was on Amami’s lap again.

”I’m- I need a break.” Shinguji gets up, quickly walking up the stairs to the dorms.

”Wait- Kiyo!” Amami goes after his boyfriend.

”I... guess we won.” Ouma stops playing with Saihara’s hair.

”You shouldn’t feel guilty, Kokichi. You didn’t do anything wrong.” Saihara mumbles half-asleep, getting off of Ouma and onto wobbly feet.

”I’m not feeling anything, Mister Detective!” Ouma huffs, supporting Saihara’s weight and walking to the elevator.

”You are.” Saihara mumbles.

”Am not.” Ouma exits the elevator when it’s on the correct floor. The two fight with “you are”s and “am not”s until Ouma manages to get them into Saihara’s dorm.

”Sleep.” The short boy huffs, pushing Saihara onto his bed. Saihara pulls Ouma down with him.  
  


* * *

  
**[9.42am]**

**worse than hell**

**useless bi** : ok but what was that yesterday??

 **useless b** i: _@korky killer @sugar daddy @kimchi @shumai_

 **sugar daddy** : i really want my name changed

 **korky killer** : You have admin..

 **sugar daddy** : o right

**sugar daddy changed sugar daddy to not avocado**

**talln't** : at least ouma makes creative names

 **not avocado** : this is bullying

 **distressed pan** : stop ignoring my gf asshats!!!

 **useless bi** : thanks miu <3

 **distressed pan** : <3

 **useless bi** : i need answers

 **mommy** : Does this have to do with why you were very... flustered last night, Shinguji-kun?

 **god is a woman** : last _night_?????

 **mommy** : Yes.

 **mommy** : It seems our little club is disbanding.

 **useless bi** : little club?

 **mommy** : Most of our members are staying the night with their partners.

 **kimchi** : ew no im just sleeping with shumai

 **mommy** : Like I said. Partners.

 **kimchi** : we’re just bffs

 **not avocado** : I feel like we’re being tricked

 **korky killer** : Don’t be dumb enough to get tricked, Taro.

 **korky killer** : And yes, that is the reason, Tojo-san.

 **cute lil lesbean** : being so formal must be a pain........

 **distressed pan** : you fucking talkin about the couple game??

 **not avocado** : yh

 **shumai** : it wasn’t exactly a couple game

 **kimchi** : yeah! me and my beloved shumai who i love very dearly are just friends!!

 **useless bi** : are they being serious???

 **distressed pan** : wait the creep got flustered over some little couple game???

 **distressed pan** : i thought he was the kinkiest bastard in our class

 **kimchi** : try again

 **distressed pan** : 2nd kinkiest bastard in our class

 **kimchi** : good job whore!!!

 **talln’t** : iruma.

 **distressed pan** : h

 **talln’t** : _iruma_.

 **distressed pan** : hhhhi

 **talln’t** : **_iruma_.**

 **distressed pan** : _HIIIIIIIIIYYYYESAAAAAAHAAAAAHAHAAAHAAAAAAAAAAHHHH_

 **talln’t** : _**IRUMA**_

 **big dick** : why hoshi cry :(

**kimchi changed big dick to bug boi**

**useless bi** : finally

 **kimchi** : control your girlfriend yay-chan

 **useless bi** : i will

**useless bi is offline**

**kimchi** : soooo did you enjoy having me all to yourself last night shumai? <3

 **distressed pan** : WHAT

 **kimchi** : welcome back slut-chan!!

 **shumai** : stop trying to make everyone think we’re a couple

 **shumai** : i would never date someone as beautiful and amazing like you

 **robot beep boop** : I believe we are being ‘trolled’!

 **shumai** : why would i try to trick you

 **robot beep boop** : You’re right, Saihara-kun.

 **robot beep boop** : We are not being tricked.

 **mommy** : _@everyone_ Breakfast is done.

 **kimchi** : thnx mooomm <3

 **shumai** : thank you tojo-san

 **distressed pan** : thanks mommy ;)

 **mommy** : Go sit in the horny corner and think about what you’ve done.

 **distressed pan** : .......fine

 **shumai** : i cant stop thinking about what iruma said 

**kimchi** : thanks mommy??

 **shumai** : not that

 **shumai** : the one about shinguji-kun

 **not avocado** : he just isnt too good with affection

 **talln’t** : right..

 **mommy** : Shinguji-kun is literally on your lap, Amami-kun.

 **not avocado** : the competition helped a bit

 **kimchi** : you’re welcome ;p

**All users are offline**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> talln’t = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> angel = Angie Yonaga  
> god is a woman = Tenko Chabashira  
> korky killer = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> distressed pan = Miu Iruma  
> bug boi = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> cute lil lesbean = Himiko Yumeno  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> phantom thief = Kokichi Ouma  
> detective = Shuichi Saihara


	20. THE ANGST BEGINS YEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS

**Hope’s Peak Exposed _@hopespeakexposed_**

”Ultimate Supreme Leader _@supremeleader_ Kokichi Ouma was seen insulting and belittling Ultimate Inventor _@hotnsexybabe_ Miu Iruma in public. Proof of the ‘supreme leader’ being abusive toward his classmate:”

**video link attached**

**[8.26am]**

**worse than hell**

**useless bi** : _@everyone_ check twitter right now

 **mommy** : This is very...

 **daddy** : he got what he deserved

 **oompa-loompa** : cmon maki roll dont act like hes being cancelled

 **not avocado** : as if his 90.3k followers would let that happen

 **shumai** : it dropped to 90k

 **not avocado** : its just a few thousand

 **talln’t** : who even is this hope’s peak exposed person??

 **angel** : They sound like a mean person!!~~

 **god is a woman** : ill kick the degenerates ass!!!!!

 **not avocado** : i thought you didnt care about males?

 **god is a woman** : youve moved to lvl 3 degenerate for questioning me

 **cute lil lesbean** : what level am i on

 **god is a woman** : youre on lvl 100 on cuteness!! <3

 **useless bi** : focus guys!!

 **shumai** : people are replying

-

**79.22k likes 10k retweets 1m comments**

**Hiyoko Saionji _@bananawig_**

”ew what a nasty pig”  
  


**10k likes 1k retweets 9.1k replies**

**Kyoko Kirigiri _@ultdetective1_**

”Who are you? Harrasing Hope’s Peak Academy’s students like this will not be tolerated.”  
  


**9.9k likes 902 retweets 3k replies**

**Kaede Akamatsu _@pianofreak_**

“please delete this tweet”  
  


**10.1k likes 8k retweets 9.8k replies**

**need strong gf pls _@donutsdonuts_**

“rlly?? and i though he was a pretty cool guy :(”  
  


**7.2k likes 830 retweets 5.9k replies**

**Nagito Komaeda for President _@luckytrash_**

”im sure you ultimates will move on from this despair and use this trash account as a stepping stool for hope!”  
  


**99.5k likes 82.3k retweets 1m replies**

**Makoto _@egg_**

”maybe its a misunderstanding :/“  
  


**5.8k likes 285 retweets 420 comments**

**Kirumi Tojo _@ultmommy_**

”If you think there is an issue with something, please privately reach out to the problem causer. Immediately turning to the public will not help you. Please delete this tweet and publicity apologize.”  
  


 **28.9k likes 12.1k retweets 23k replies**  
  
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**Hope’s Peak Exposed _@hopespeakexposed_**

”I have reached out to _@supremeleader_ (as seen by the screenshot below) but he laughed it off and called me a troll. Isn’t that enough evidence that he’s truly rotten inside?”

**photo link attached  
  
**

**49.5k likes 11k retweets 71.1k replies**

**|**  
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 **K1-B0 _@stoprobophobia2020_**

”You have violated Ouma-kun’s privacy twice now, breaking the law in the process. I’m sure Ouma-kun nor Iruma-san gave any permission to you to record the footage that you did or for you to publish screenshots of a chat you had with Ouma-kun, that could be fabricated. Legal action will be taken.”  
  


**75.2k likes 20k retweets 94.2k replies**

**|**   
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**Hope’s Peak Exposed _@hopespeakexposed_**

”Why do you feel the need to defend someone who’s always been robophobic and cruel to you from the start? He won’t even try to defend himself.”  
  


**31.9k likes 11.8k retweets 72.3k replies**

**gorgeous girl genius _@hotnsexybabe_**

”who tf is _@hopespeakexposed_ ???? i wasnt being bullied by the stupid gremlin at all delete ur acc troll”  
  


**96.8k likes 74.6k retweets 69k replies**

**|**   
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**ult inventor miu!! _@miufanaccount_**

”you dont need to lie to us queen!! we know how horrible he is!!! just come out with the truth we’ll protect you from him!!“  
  


**9.8k likes 2k retweets 16k replies**

**|**   
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**kill all gremlins _@kokichihateacc_**

“just fucking kill him no one likes him anyway”

**921 likes 2 retweets 12k replies**

**|**  
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 **kiyomi _@kiyominajuri_**

”dude what the fuck is wrong with u”

**|**   
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**kokichis wife and gf @mrsouma**

”youre evil miu we’ll fuckinf destroy you for trying to camcel my husband!1!1!1!!”  
  


**10.2k likes 3.9k retweets 10k replies**

**gremlin child _@supremeleader_**

”wow death threats are so funnnn!!!”  
  


**2.1mil likes 428.2k retweets 7mil replies**

**[8.29pm]**

**yay-chan — > kichi**

**yay-chan** : are you ok kokichi?

 **kichi** : im juuuuusst peachy akamatsu!!

 **yay-chan** : ouch last name

 **yay-chan** : you havent left your room all day

 **yay-chan** : do you wanna watch a movie together?

 **yay-chan** : shuichi momota miu gonta and amami will be there :D

 **kichi** : what about mom

 **yay-chan** : shes busy trying to figure out who the asshole could be

 **kichi** : whoooaaa kayayday swearing!!!!!

 **yay-chan** : youve seen it before

 **yay-chan** : now hurry uo and open the door

 **kichi** : okk!!

 **yay-chan** : <3

 **kichi** : ew im gay <3

**both users are offline**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @hopespeakexposed = ???  
> @bananawig = Hiyoko Saionji  
> @ultdetective1 = Kyoko Kirigiri  
> @pianofreak = Kaede Akamatsu  
> @donutsdonuts = Aoi Asahina  
> @luckytrash = Nagito Komaeda  
> @egg = Makoto Naegi  
> @ultmommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> @stoprobophobia2020 = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> @hotnsexybabe = Miu Iruma   
> @miufanaccount = ??? (unimportant)  
> @kokichihateacc = ??? (unimportant)  
> @kiyominajuri = ??? (unimportant)  
> @mrsouma = ??? (unimportant)  
> @supremeleader = Kokichi Ouma
> 
> not avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> talln’t = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> angel = Angie Yonaga  
> god is a woman = Tenko Chabashira  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> cute lil lesbean = Himiko Yumeno  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> yay-chan = Kaede Akamatsu  
> kichi = Kokichi Ouma


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry about the short chapter!! i have a few tests coming soon so the next chapter might take a while!! <3

**Hope’s Peak Exposed _@hopespeakexposed_**

”Kaito Momota _@luminaryofthestars_ and Maki Harukawa _@ultchildcaregiver_ seen together out in public. Could they be dating?”  
  


**89.3k likes 67.1k retweets 80.8m replies**   
  


**gremlin child _@supremeleader_**

”awww you moved on so quickly :,( i thought it was true love!! 💔”  
  


**98.2k likes 12.5k retweets 1.8m replies**

**Usami _@monomi_**

”Please don’t talk about my students like this! Love love!”  
  


**52.9k likes 29.2k retweets 26.1k replies**

**Junko Enoshima _@juwunkowoowoficcial_**

”wowoowwowowo!!! draaaammaaaa!!! totally though piano girl and ‘child caregiver’ were dating!!!”  
  


**10.9m likes 927.7k retweets 12.2m replies  
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Sayaka Maizono _@sayakamaizonoofficial_**

”Enoshima-san, please stay out of this kind of stuff. Other’s personal lives aren’t our business, you should know this. It also makes you look unprofessional.”

  
**10.3m likes 925.9k retweets 14.9m replies**

**Kaito Momota!! _@luminaryofthestars_**

”this is personal stuff man stop it”  
  


**61.2k likes 19.9k retweets 12k replies**

**Maki Haruknife _@ultchildcaregiver_**

“ _do you wanna die?_ ”  
  


**49.8k likes 1.1k retweets 10.3k replies**

**[10.54am]**

**worse than hell**

**oompa-loompa** : this isnt how i planned on twlling you guys

 **kimchi** : twelling

 **oompa-loompa** : stfu youre the same height as a 5th grader

 **kimchi** : and ive saved your money by pretending to be a child whats your point

 **distressed pan** : will never fucken forget about the first time

 **useless bi** : kokichi was so upset he wouldnt talk to us for a week

 **daddy** : i wish he stopped talking forever

 **kimchi** : ok stfu yadyayak-chan my pride was hurt and my ego wounded

 **shumai** : yadyayak?????

 **not avocado** : kayayday backwards

 **shumai** : _why_

 **kimchi** : cuz i can

 **junko is waifu** : are we really ignoring how momota just confirmed hes dating harukawa??!?!?!??!

 **mommy** : Eveyone knew.

 **korky killer** : They weren’t being very secretive after all.

 **oompa-loompa** : wait srsly

 **daddy** : we were supposed to keep it a secret??

 **useless bi** : this is a mess......

**[11.23pm]**

**kichi — > tsumtsum**   
  


**kichi** : you alright??

 **tsumtsum** : im plainly fine!!

 **tsumtsum** : why do you ask

 **kichi** : youve been offline a lot

 **tsumtsum** : ive been watching anime

 **kichi** : you barely reacted to the reveal of uhh

 **kichi** : what was the name

 **kichi** : kaemaki??

 **tsumtsum** : no thats harukawa and akamatsu!!

 **tsumtsum** : kaimaki is the correct ship name

 **kichi** : your ship names are stupid

 **tsumtsum** : i put a lot of effort into them >:(

 **kichi** : we’re getting sidetracked!! >:T

 **tsumtsum** : alright im not feeling the best right now

 **kichi** : want us to come over

 **tsumtsum** : no its fine

 **tsumtsum** : wait us??

 **kichi** : im not talking about me and shumai

 **tsumtsum** : did you mean you and saihara by th

 **tsumtsum** : oh

 **kichi** : sleep you big dummy

 **tsumtsum** : only if you will

 **kichi** : niighttt

 **tsumtsum** : goodnight drama queen

 **kichi** : *god

**kichi is offline**

**tsumtsum** : _[DELETED MESSAGE]_

  
  


**[3.51am]**

**bitch — > [REDACTED]**

**  
bitch** : time’s ticking~

 **[REDACTED]** : leave me alone

 **bitch** : sure sure ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @hopespeakexposed = ???  
> @supremeleader = Kokichi Ouma  
> @monomi = Usami/Monomi  
> @juwunkowoowoficcial = Junko Enoshima  
> @sayakamaizonoofficial = Sayaka Maizono  
> @luminaryofthestars = Kaito Momota  
> @ultchildcaregiver = Maki Harukawa
> 
>   
> not avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> korky killer = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> distressed pan = Miu Iruma  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> kichi = Kokichi Ouma  
> tsumtsum = Tsumugi Shirogane
> 
> bitch = ???  
> [REDACTED] = ???


	22. i forgot to title the last chapter lol

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> guess which personality every typing style is (answers in the end notes)!!! this is for junko btw

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW/CW graphic death threats (not the usual “do you wanna die?” like actually graphic), angie calls a certain someone a skank, slut-shaming (bad miu), implied kidnapping

**[5.24pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**useless bi** : this hope’s peak exposed person is really horrible

 **kimchi** : oh wow kaede couldn't fucking tell

 **mommy** : No need to get hostile, Kokichi. It’s not Akamatsu-san’s fault whoever is running that account exists.

 **daddy** : i’ll murder their parents and make them watch

 **junko is waifu** : that’s a bit much don’t you think....?

 **daddy** : you’re right

 **daddy** : it’s not enough

 **oompa-loompa** : maki roll no

 **kimchi** : maki roll yes!!!!

 **shumai** : kokichi please

 **kimchi** : what??? >:T

 **not avocado** : just leave kokichi be for now

 **not avocado** : all the hate has been getting to him

 **god is a woman** : he’s getting backlash for being mean to a woman he should be grateful he’s still verified

 **god is a woman** : stop being dramatic degenerate!!!

 **robot beep boop** : He’s getting daily death threats and a person stalked him for a few days.

 **robot beep boop** : I personally believe Ouma-kun has a right to be upset.

 **god is a woman** : ......tenko didn’t know that

 **god is a woman** : tenko is sorry

 **god is a woman** : but only this once!!

 **cute lil lesbean** : accept her apology ouma

 **distressed pan** : _@kimchi_ hey fucker

 **distressed pan** : ????

 **mastermind** : Could It Be..?

 **mastermind** : wow you work quick!!!! (⌒▽⌒)

 **useless bi** : enoshima?!

 **korky killer** : I believe she should not be here.

 **mommy** : Did no one remove her from the chat?

 **not avocado** : its not letting me ban her

 **angel** : Doesn’t that mean the ugly skank is the one behind the account??~~

 **mommy** : Though I don’t approve of the language your theory may be right.

 **distressed pan** : theory???!? that shit’s facts

 **talln’t** : it would make sense

 **talln’t** : the hope’s peak acc mostly targets us the 77th class and the 78th

 **talln’t** : shes in the 78th class and in our group chat

 **not avocado** : and she knows the ultimate hacker so she could see our private chats

 **useless bi** : well weve uncovered the mystery!!

 **mastermind** : And what will you do now?

 **daddy** : kill you

 **mastermind** : awww really??? that’s your plan??? i dont wanna die thooooo 。・°°・(＞_＜)・°°・。

 **daddy** : ill fucking hunt you down and ill tear your limbs off one by one and make you fucking eat them until you choke on them and youll be sobbing for me to have mercy on you

 **mastermind** : _1f y0u c4n fuck3n c4tch m3 th4t 1s!!!_

 **useles bi** : why is she typing like that

 **junko is waifu** : she isnt even doing it correctly >:/

 **bug boi** : gonta think it funny!!

 **talln’t** : it isnt funny when she does it

 **bug boi** : oh ok!! <3

 **talln’t** :

 **talln’t** : ouma i will kill you

 **shumai** : .....

 **daddy** : .......

 **useless bi** : ......

 **mommy** : This is.... odd.

 **korky killer** : How come?

 **mommy** : Kokichi would usually reply with something by now. 

**mastermind** : That’s What *I* Was Talking About At The Start! You Should Pay Attention To *Me* You Peasant!

 **distressed pan** : why tf does the slut have like a million different typing stlyes

 **mastermind** : A million and eight, actually.

 **different pan** : same thing bitch

 **shumai** : what did you do to kokichi

 **mastermind** : you think i did somehting??? no wayy!!! im way too cute and innocent for thaaaatt!!! (*^▽^*)

 **shumai** : _**what did you do?**_

 **mastermind** : _0H N0 1M T0TALLY SH4KING 1N mY FUCK3N B00TS!!!!! jUst k1dd1ng!!!! 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕_

 **useless bi** : what happened shuichi?!

 **shumai** : kokichi isnt in his room

 **mastermind** : Geez Mr Paranoidy-Pants! He could be out visiting a friend for all we know!!~~

 **angel** : Stealing Angie’s typing style is off-limits!! Kami-Sama vill punish you!!~~

 **not avocado** : hes way too paranoid to go out without one of us after being stalked by a stranger

 **daddy** : besides he doesnt have any friends

 **oonpa-loompa** : not now maki roll

 **daddy** : fine

 **mommy** : You must have done something to him.

 **robot beep boop** : You’re the only one who could’ve!

 **mastermind** : wow i totally lost didn’t i

 **mastermind** : _But what will you do now, huh?_

 **useless bi** : what do you mean?

 **mastermind** : _I mean, you’ve figured it out. I kidnapped him._

 **mastermind** : _But what will you do?_

 **mastermind** : _There’s no way you can track me down and if you try to come after me at school or in public there will be witnesses and suddenly you’re in jail for assault._

 **mastermind** : _And I have a bodyguard with me at all times._

 **mastermind** : _Checkmate~_

 **shumai** : she’s right...

 **useless bi** : how will we get kokichi back

 **kimchi** : by not listening to liars

 **kimchi** : just a suggestion!

 **useless bi** : kokichi!!!

 **shumai** : kokichi!

 **bug boi** : kokichi!!! :D

 **mommy** : Kokichi, you’re safe. I’m glad.

 **not avocado** : oh there you are

 **distressed pan** : twink!!

 **god is a woman** : degenerate!!

 **talln’t** : uh

 **god is a woman** : dont get the wrong idea!!!!!!!!

 **mastermind** : _Oh?~_

 **mastermind** : _You’re still here?_

 **kimchi** : of course!!!

 **mastermind** : _So I guess my little spy didn’t do their job._

 **cute lil lesbean** : nyeh?? your spy??

 **korky killer** : She’s saying that there’s a traitor in our group.

 **useless bi** : a.... traitor?

**BONUS** :

**shumai** : where tf were you kokichi  
  
 **kimchi** : visiting a friend

 **mastermind** : _1 T0LD Y0U 1 W4S R1GHT H4 FUCK3RS!!!!!_

 **distressed pan** : holy fuck he has friends

 **mommy** : Why do I feel like a proud mother....?

 **korky killer** : If I recall correctly, we were told you were too paranoid to leave the dormitory at the moment.

 **junko is waifu** : oh he was just visiting me!

 **distressed pan** : AND YOU DIDNT FUCKING TELL US THAT BEFORE WE JUMPED TO CONCLUSIONS?!?!?!?!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i swear i love junko dontkillmepls
> 
> not avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> talln’t = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> angel = Angie Yonaga  
> god is a woman = Tenko Chabashira  
> korky killer = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> distressed pan = Miu Iruma  
> bug boi = Gonta Gokuhara  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> cute lil lesbean = Himiko Yumeno  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa  
> shumai = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> mastermind = Junko Enoshima
> 
> personality answers!!:
> 
> didn’t add most/all personalities junko has in this chapter cuz i forgot most of them while making said chapter,,, sorry :(
> 
> Typed Like This! = queen/royalty personality
> 
> junko enoshima!!! ( ＾∀＾) = cutesy personality
> 
> proper grammar and lines underneath the text = smart/teacher(?) personality
> 
> junk0 3noshima (with italics) = tongue-out crazy personality
> 
> Junko Enoshima!!~ (angie’s typing style) = Monokuma-ish
> 
> proper grammar but ✨italics✨ = dark/threatening personality


	23. happy hollow weenie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> have some sweet sweet saiouma on hollow weenie man day
> 
> posted on exactly 12am be proud

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw mha, saiouma make out session (idk how to write them skskskssk), name-calling (whore, slut etc.)
> 
> also WHAT THE FUCK IS SHUICHI’S EYE COLOR??!!? WHAT ARE COLORS WHEN IT COMES TO DR NEIJDEIDNEIDNPEJED
> 
> KOKCIHI’S HAIR IS BLUE BUT EVERYONE (including me ofc) SAYS IT’S PURPLE IM- WHY CAN’T DR JUST STICK TO A SIMPLE COLOR FOR STRUGGLING ARTISTS/FANFIC WRITERS LIKE ME TT^TT (also makis hair is the weirdest color of brown ive ever seen)

**[12.08pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**kimchi** : shuumaaaaiiiiii lets wear matching costumesss

 **shumai** : why?

 **kimchi** : because i love you?

 **shumai** : im convinced

 **junko is waifu** : wh

 **junko is waifu** : _WHAT_

 **useless bi** : WHEN DID YOU TWO START DATING

 **not avocado** : wait you guys didn’t know??

 **shumai** : we’re not dating

 **kimchi** : we’re juuustt friends!!!

 **kimchi** : isn’t that right my one and only true love shuichi?~ <3 <3

 **shumai** : of course <3

 **talln’t** : they’re messing with us

 **mommy** : They have to be.

 **bug boi** : gonta not sure :(

 **shumai** : why would we mess with you guys??

 **daddy** : .......

 **shumai** : why would _*i*_ mess with you guys

 **useless bi** : i’m glad you corrected yourself shuichi

 **oompa-loompa** : maki roll let’s wear matching costumes too

 **daddy** : what would we even wear

 **kimchi** : i’ve got the prefect one!!!

 **kimchi** : i sent it to you kaito ;)

 **oonpa-loompa** : hell yee

 **daddy** : no

 **daddy** : absolutely not

 **kimchi** : :(

 **oompa-loompa** : :(

 **daddy** :

**daddy is offline**

**useless bi** : _@distressed pan_ matching costumes?

 **distressed pan** : let’s be sexy nurses

 **useless bi** : no

 **junko is waifu** : i thought tsumiki-san was going as a sexy nurse??

 **mastermind** : she is!!! （＾Ｏ＾）

 **shumai** : why is she still here

**kimchi banned mastermind**

**distressed pan** : let’s go as sexy gardeners then

 **useless bi** : wtf no

 **uselesbian bi** : shirogane please just make our costumes im begging

 **junko is waifu** : i’ll make them

 **kimchi** : let’s go buy our costumesss shuumaiiiii!!!!

 **junko is waifu** : i could make them too!

 **kimchi** : no thanks bye shirogane!!

**kimchi is offline**

**junko is waifu** : oh

 **junko is waifu** : ok then

 **shumai** : i‘ll talk to him

 **junko is waifu** : thanks

**shumai is offline**

**not avocado** : _@korky killer_ what’re the dumbest couple costumes we can buy

 **korky killer** : i have an idea

**Hope’s Peak Exposed _@hopespeakexposed_**

”77th, 78th and 79th’s Halloween party, a thread.”  
  


**10m likes 20.9k retweets 100m replies**

**|**   
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**Hope’s Peak Exposed _@hopespeakexpsoed_**

”(Couple) costumes were:

**—————**

**—————**

**—————**

**—————**

Kaede Akamatsu _@pianofreak_ , a demon + Miu Iruma _@hotnsexybabe_ , an angel

Rantaro Amami _@notavocado_ , a sexy doctor + Korekiyo Shinguji _@ultanthropologist_ , a sexy nurse

Angie Yonaga _@kamisamasoracle_ , a sexy priest + Tenko Chabashira _@girlprotector_ , a knight + Himiko Yumeno _@ultmage_ , a mage

Gonta Gokuhara _@bugfriends_ , a bee + Ryoma Hoshi _@ryoma_ , a ladybug

Kaito Momota _@luminaryofthestars_ , an oompa-loompa + Maki Harukawa _@ultchildcaregiver_ , a female oompa-loompa

Kokichi Ouma _@supremeleader_ , a princess + Shuichi Saihara _@ultdetective_ , a prince

Tsumugi Shirogane _@ultcosplayer_ , Tsuyu Asui from My Hero Academia

Kirumi Tojo _@ultmommy_ , a vintage maid

K1-B0/Kiibo _@stoprobophobia2020_ , a pumpkin”  
  


**9.2m likes 12.5k retweets 52.3m replies**

**Maki Haruknife _@ultchildcaregiver_**

”we’re over _@luminaryofthestars_ , you’re dead _@supremeleader_ ”  
  


**52.8k likes 37.1k retweets 69.8k replies**

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**gremlin child _@supremeleader_**

”totally worth it <3”  
  


**72.9k likes 29.1k retweets 39.2k replies**

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**Kaito Momota _@luminaryofthestars_**

“im sorry maki roll :(“

  
**52.6k likes 45.9k retweets 12.8k replies**

* * *

  
“You know we don’t have to do anything, right?” Ouma raises a brow at his— ( _friend? boyfriend?_ ) at Saihara, who’s pacing around the room.

”I know, but-“ Saihara pauses, his cheeks turning red.

”Buut?~” Ouma rests his head in his hands, sitting up on the bed he’s on.

You see, Ouma and Saihara had been chosen for 7 minutes in Heaven. It’s only been a minute. The two boys had been mostly avoiding each other for the past 30 minutes before being shoved into a closet because of, well, a confession of sorts.

”Ouma, did you mean it when you said you love me?” Saihara meets his gaze with determination. Ouma stares right back.

”Did I?” Ouma tilts his head, poking at his cheek with a finger.

”Kokichi, please.” And there it is again. The way Saihara spoke his name made his face feel warm and his thought muddled. _It really wasn’t fair_.

Wait— fuck. He’s been quiet for too long.

”Geez, fine. I _don’t_ love you, Saihara-chan.” Ouma ignores the obvious hurt on Saihara’s face and instead stares at his manicured nails.

”You’re lying.” Saihara says yet Ouma doesn’t lift his head.

”Hmm?~ Or is that just what you want to believe?” Ouma grins. “I’m being very honest, you know.” And suddenly theres a hand under his chin, lifting his head up to look into muted green eyes.

”Are you?” Ouma’s cheeks turn bright red, which Saihara immediately notices. 

He curses whatever god Yonaga keeps spouting nonsense about.

”Yes.” Ouma answers, keeping his cool, thought the bright blush on his face isn’t helping his case— not like Saihara’s face is any less red. Ouma doesn’t realize they’re inching closer to each other until he can feel Saihara’s breath on his lips.

”I want to kiss you.” Saihara whispers, looking into Ouma’s eyes again. _When did he look away?_

“Then kiss me.” Ouma barely finishes his sentence before Saihara’s lips crash into his.

The supreme leader’s arms wrap around the other’s neck, pulling Saihara closer. Saihara has to steady himself by placing a hand on the bed while the other is on Ouma’s waist.

He internally apologizes to Yonaga’s god for cursing him and thanks him a thousand times.

Their make out session is interrupted by Iruma bursting through the door 2 minutes too early.  
  


* * *

**[10.27pm]**

**worse than hell**

**bug boi** : congrat kokichi and shuichi!!

 **mommy** : Congratulations on finally getting together.

 **not avocado** : i genuinely thought they were already dating

 **kimchi** : me too

 **shumai** : i did too but i didn’t want to assume

 **kimchi** : i said i loved you and wanted to date

 **shumai** : yeah but you could’ve been lying

 **kimchi** : we went on 5 dates!!

 **shumai** : what if they were just platonic??

 **kimchi** : I SPENT EVERY NIGHT IN YOUR DORM AND KISSED YOU!!!

 **shumai** : it could be platonic??

 **useless bi** : oh god it’s the yumeno and tenko situation all over again

 **god is a woman** : KSKSKSJSISKJSMSL

 **useless bi** : tenko???

 **cute lil lesbean** : she’s still getting used to being on first name basis with you

 **angel** : Better back off, Kaede!! Tenko is Angie’s girlfriend!!~~

 **cute lil lesbean** : nyeh what angie said

 **distressed pan** : yeah well tell chabashira to back off my girlfreidn

 **kimchi** : girlfreidn

 **distressed pan** : fuck off whore

 **kimchi** : you sure you aren’t talking about yourself?

 **distressed pan** : twink

 **kimchi** : skank

 **distressed pan** : slut

 **kimchi** : cum filled urinal

 **distressed pan** : an abortion gone wrong

 **kimchi** : trash bag

 **distressed pan** : little bitch

 **useless bi** : guys stopp

 **distressed pan** : no fucken way

 **kimchi** : yeaaahhh its fuuuuuunnnnn

 **uselsss bi** : ill cuddle with you twice as much if you stop fighting with kokichi for a week minimum

 **distressed pan** : ....really?

 **useless bi** : ofc! <3

 **distressed pan** : ......<3

 **kimchi** : why aren’t we like that

 **shumai** : because we just started dating???

 **kimchi** : so???

 **kimchi** : anyway i better get cuddles too yay-may-day-say-kay-lay-hay chan

 **not avocado** : how do you manage to make the nicknames worse every time

 **useless bi** : i’m scared of your nickname making kokichi

 **kimchi** : â̶̛̙̩̤͇̳̮̝̰͒͐̌̊̃̎̍́͑̊͘ș̶̡̛̺̥̉̇͑̎̈̚͝͝ ̷̢̢̹͖̲̳̭͍̻̬̖̺͖͈̹̻͍͓̤͈̰̲͉͉͇̱̟̮͖̥͖̻͈̄͑͜͠ͅͅy̵̨̡̧̞̩͖̗̫̞̪̞̯̪̹͇̩͔̫̖̞̞̟͉̭̍̂̽͆̀͊̉̽͒̌̑̀̓͌̀̌͆̀͑̊̒͋̿̉̕͜ͅͅo̷̧̨̡̯̫̼̗̘͎͚̙̐͛̓͐͑͝͝ư̵̢̧̖͔̮̮̞̹̦͎̫̣̬͉̙̳̖̥̗͇͈͋̉̈́͌͗̈́́̀̓̽̅̌́̀̓̉̄̔͑̔̑̓̑̈͂͂̈͋͗̂͘͜͝ͅ ̵̨̧̙̬̮͇̦͕̲͎̫̳̖̰̼̱̼͇̥͉͉̻̲́̋͜s̷̨̛̰̻͓͖͉͖͎͔̪̤͚̝͓̎̐̅̃̍́̉̎̀̿̽̉̒̇̿̕͝͠͝h̴̩̲̠̦͖͙̻̬̦̀̍̈́͌͐́͗ǫ̷̡̘̬̲̦̠̖͎̮̺̞͖̋̑̇ͅͅǔ̴̡̢̢̧̧̜̠̟̝͕̗̗̼͚͍̘̥̰͈͚̳̗̳͓̺̯̝͔̗̻̻̱͙͜ͅͅl̵̗͙̬̺͑̽̽̔͌̓́͘d̵̢̛͉̦̻̳̱̮̰̮̈́̈́̾̌̈́̄̈́̔͊̈́̀̔̏̃̊̓̇͠͝ͅ

 **distressed pan** : WHAT THE FU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> any theories on who’s who?? :D
> 
> not avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> useless bi = Kaede Akamatsu  
> talln’t = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> angel = Angie Yonaga  
> god is a woman = Tenko Chabashira  
> korky killer = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> distressed pan = Miu Iruma  
> kimchi = Kokichi Ouma  
> oompa-loompa = Kaito Momota  
> junko is waifu = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> robot beep boop: K1-B0/Kiibo  
> shumai =Shuichi Saihara  
> cute lil lesbean = Himiko Yumeno  
> daddy = Maki Harukawa
> 
> @hopespeakexposed = ???  
> @notavocado = Rantaro Amami  
> @pianofreak = Kaede Akamatsu  
> @ryoma = Ryoma Hoshi  
> @ultmommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> @kamisamasoracle = Angie Yonaga  
> @girlprofector =Tenko Chabashira  
> @ultanthropologist = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> @hotnsexybabe = Miu Iruma  
> @bugfriemds = Gonta Gokuhara  
> @supremeleader = Kokichi Ouma  
> @luminaryofthestars = Kaito Momota  
> @ultcosplayer = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> @stoprobophobia2020 = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> @ultchildcaregiver = Maki Harukawa  
> @ultmage = Himiko Yumeno  
> @ultdetective = Shuichi Saihara


	24. bruh i keep forgetting abt this fic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> me: omg is that kaemaki and oumota i see?? 
> 
> you: what no wayyyy kaimaki, irumatsu and saiouma are already in this fic you can’t add mooreee
> 
> me: but what if the kaemaki/oumota is ✨i m p l i e d✨?
> 
> you: GASP
> 
> (im sorry) (kinda)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my humor is horrible im so sorry
> 
> stupid avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> piano licker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> ryonya = Ryoma Hoshi  
> boring = Kirumi Tojo  
> w-what are you doing step-kamisama = Angie Yonaga  
> pretty lesbian, choke me with your thicc thighs = Tenko Chabashira  
> creepy is weepy = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> robot fucker = Miu Iruma  
> i can’t come up with anything fuck = Gonta Gokuhara  
> supreme snacc = Kokichi Ouma  
> starships were meant to flyyy = Kaito Momota  
> alexa play despacito = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> junko’s #1 fan = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> nyeh nyeh = Himiko Yumeno  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> shoe itchy = Shuichi Saihara

**[8.26am]**

**worse than hell**

**robot fucker** : ok i can’t stop fucking thinking abt this

 **robot fucker** : why the fuck did you impersonate chabashira when we played the shit game with the shit whore _@junko’s #1 fan_

 **stupid avocado** : glad to know i’m not the only one still thinking abt this

 **junko’s #1 fan** : uh for the drama i guess.........?

 **robot fucker** : why the fuck would you

 **robot fucker** : you know what nvm

 **ass ass in** : while we’re on the topic

 **ass ass in** : why do you know about scars on ouma’s body _@piano licker_

 **piano licker** :

 **boring** : That is not on topic.

 **piano licker** : so how’s everyone doing on this amazing day?

 **i can’t come up with anything fuck** : good!! how is akamatsu??

 **alexa play despacito** : I am doing very well today if you don’t count the existential crisis I’m going through at the moment! How about you Akamatsu-san?

 **ass ass in** : don’t ignore me

 **stupid avocado** : don’t ignore kiibs’ existential crisis

 **piano licker** : i could never ignore you

 **supreme snacc** : gaaaayyyyyyyy

 **robot fucker** : so are you

 **supreme snacc** : yeah about thatt

 **ryonya** : who the fuck is blasting the bisexual anthem i just wanna talk

 **supreme snacc** : ;)

 **robot fucker** : woah i though you were gay

 **supreme snacc** : so did i

 **alexa play despacito** : Congratulations on figuring out your sexuality!

 **piano licker** : congrats!!

 **boring** : Congratulations.

 **supreme snacc** : thanks!!!

 **alexa play despacito** : Which reminds me, I wish to be called by they/them pronouns.

 **stupid avocado** : 👌

 **piano licker** : alright!!

 **ass ass in** : you still haven’t answered my question

 **piano licker** : sorry i was just too distracted by your utter beauty and sexiness

 **ass ass in** : i

**ass ass in is offline**

**supreme snacc** : woooowww sly yay-chan

 **robot fucker** : didn’t know you had it in you babe

 **piano licker** : no idea what you’re talking about

 **junko’s #1 fan** : couldn’t you have just answered her question??

 **piano licker** :

 **supreme snacc** :

 **stupid avocado** : what did you two do

 **piano licker** : nothing......

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : sup guys

 **supreme snacc** : momo-chan!! i missed youuu!!

 **robot fucker** : you’re literally on his lap

 **robot fucker** : don’t you have a boyfriend

 **starships were meant to flyy** : and why the fuck are you on my lap

 **ryonya** : why are you letting him stay on your lap

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : good question

 **piano licker** : and yet he still doesn’t move kokichi

 **shoe itchy** : i just read back and you’e bi?? _@supreme snacc_

 **supreme snacc** : sure am

 **shoe itchy** : congrats on figuring it out

 **supreme snacc** : thanks shuuumaiiiii

 **supreme snacc** : im so happy i discovered my love for pussy (like momo-chan said in his beautiful speech)

 **starships were meant to flyy** : i regret nothing

 **ass ass in** : you should

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : :(

 **supreme snacc** : like dating stinky harumaki-chan instead of me >:((

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : dude wtf

 **supreme snacc** : dude?? does our love mean nothing to you?!?! >:’(

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : what love

 **stupid avocado** : dude can be romantic

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : what

 **ass ass in** : why is the brat on your lap

 **shoe itchy** : i’d like to know too

 **supreme snacc** : jealous?? ;)

 **shoe itchy** : yes

 **supreme snacc** : oh

 **robot fucker** : omfg he’s blushing lolol

 **robot fucker** : and not just because of the bulge in moronta’s pants 😏🥵😉

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : _what the fuck_

 **ass ass in** : _**DIE**_.

 **ryonya** : _why_

 **stupid avocado** : why the emojis

 **suprememe snacc** : she’s right tho 😳🥵😏😉😍

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : NO SHE’S NOT

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : you know what get off

 **supreme snacc** : awwwwww :(

 **ass ass in** : finally

 **boring** : I am glad to see Saihara-kun stop staring at Momota-kun like he wants to kill him.

 **supreme snacc** : aww you were that jealous???

 **supreme snacc** : don’t worry babe i only love you and your big fat di

 **stupid avocado** : killed mid sentence rip

 **nyeh nyeh** : hi

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : Good morning Angie’s friends!!~~

 **choke me with your thicc thighs** : good morning girls (exluding iruma), gonta and kiibo!!!

 **robit ficker** : fuck you too

 **supreme snacc** : what about mlm wlw solidarity :(

 **choke me with your thicc thighs** : lost your kinda-not-but-still-is degenerate status with those bad messages tainting hmiko’s innocence!!!!

 **piano licker** : you need to change her name i can’t stop thinking about you know what every time i read it

 **robot fucker** : i don’t know why don’t you tell me

 **piano licker** : miu please

 **robot fucke** r: say it

 **piano licker** : t.... t......

 **piano licker** : I CAN’T IT’S TOO EMBARRASSING

**junko’s #1 fan changed choke me with your thicc thighs to pretty lesbian**

**pretty lesbian** : i

 **pretty lesbian** : thank you so much shirogane!!! <3 <3

 **nyeh nyeh** : she’s crying

 **junko’s #1 fan** : oh no im plainly sorry!!

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : No no!! They’re happy tears!!~~

 **junko’s #1 fan** : im glad..

 **robot fucker** : booooo shittygane i was having fun teasing kaede

 **supreme snacc** : bet she was into it

 **ass ass in** : _DIE_

 **supreme snacc** : no thnx <3

 **junko’s #1 fan** : sorry to ruin the fun but akamatsu looked like she was about to explode with how red she was

**supreme snacc removed admin from 1 user**

**junko’s #1 fan** : ah.

 **shoe itchy** : that was pretty petty..

 **stupid avocado** : it wasn’t that big of a deal kichi give her admin back

 **supreme snacc** : noooo wayyyyyyyyy

 **supreme snacc** : anyway im tired gn!!

 **piano licker** : it’s morning..

**supreme snacc is offline**

**alexa play despacito** : Is he okay?

 **ass ass in** : doesn’t matter

 **piano licker** : i’m sure he’s fine

 **stupid avocado** : hopefully

 **piano licker** : yeah

 **robot fucker** : where’s the creep??

 **stupid avoado** : don’t call him that

 **robot fucker** : why not it’s in his name

 **boring** : I’m pretty sure his name isn’t Korekiyo Creep Shinguji.

 **robit fucker** : you know what i fucking mean

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : @creepy is weepy

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **creepy is weepy** : What.

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : _@creepy is weepy_

 **robot ficker** : oh wait you answered

 **creepy is weepy** : That I did. What do you want?

 **robit fucke** r: geeezz what’s got your panties in a twist???

 **creepy is weepy** : If that was all, I’m going back to bed.

**creepy is weepy is offline**

**w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : How cold!!~~

 **robae fucker** : what a prick

 **stupid avocado** : he’s having a bit of a rough morning

 **stupid avocado** : just leave him aline fir now

 **boring** : Breakfast is ready, come eat. _@everyone_

**All users are offline**

**[7.57pm]**

**worse than hell**

**ryonya** : so we’re really just ignoring how all our names changed mysteriously

 **nyeh nyeh** : i nyuess

 **mastermind** : ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im nealry asleep lol
> 
> mastermind = Junko Enoshima


	25. honestly i feel like it takes me 3 days to make a single chapter bcs i keep taking breaks that turn into like 10 hour breaks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW! mentions if stabbing, someone actually got (kinda) stabbed
> 
> anyway enjoy ig 😗✌️

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why are my only funny jokes like inappropriate
> 
> should this story be rated m??
> 
> can’t believe angie’s name is like the funniest thing in this entire fic imo

**[9.23pm]**

**worse than hell**

**stupid avocado** : can’t believe i got stabbed again

 **boring** : ...........Again?

 **creepy is weepy** : Are you alright? Where are you?

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : You’ll finally be able to meet Kami-sama!!~~

 **supreme snacc** : lmao loser

 **shoe itchy** : translation: omg are you okay where are you im going to cry please tell me you’re okay call the police i am looking for you right now i will cry

 **supreme snacc** : fuck you

 **robot fuccer** : i’m sure he’d want to ;)

 **stupid avocado** : im ok i just cut myself while making myself some guacamole

 **boring** : Cutting yourself is not the same as being stabbed.

**supreme snacc is offline**

**robot fucker** : lmao rip avocado he became the guacamole he wanted to eat

 **alexa play despacito** : Amami-kun, are you okay? Cuts can become dangerous if not cared for properly.

 **shoe itchy** : he won’t be okay after kokichi finds him

 **robot fucker** : i ain’t paying for the funeral

 **ass ass in** : i hate this class so much

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : :(

 **ass ass in** : no exceptions

 **nyeh nyeh** : deja vu......

 **stupid avocado** : i ylso hir stah dds ny;a dfug dfser

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : Uh oh!! Looks like the joke became reality!! Angie will pray for you!!~~

 **shoe itchy** : what is he saying???

 **boring** : I believe he’s saying that he was stabbed by a drug dealer.

**creepy is weepy is offline**

**robot fucker** : uh oh lol

 **pretty lesbian** : his fault for hanging around drug dealers!! stupid degenerate >:T

 **nyeh nyeh** : oh emoticons

 **nyeh nyeh** : cute

 **pretty lesbian** : you think so?!?!?! O/////O

 **w-what are you doing step-kayayday** : Of course!! Tenko is always cute!!~~

 **pretty lesbian** : you’re always cute too angie and himiko!!

 **piano licker** : im happy that you’re happy and this is cute and all but WHAT ABOUT AMAMI WHO gOT S TABBED?!?!?!!

 **nyeh nyeh** : oh right i forgot

 **junko’s #1 fan** : how......?

 **creepy is weepy** : We found him.

 **creepy is weepy** : He’ll be fine after being bandaged up and left to rest for the night.

 **creepy is weepy** : The knife didn’t enter him so it isn’t as serious as I feared.

 **robot fucker** : oh great i got worried for nothin

 **alexa play despacito** : It is not nothing!

 **boring** : I will help take care of him.

 **shoe ithcy** : where’s kokichi?

 **creepy is weepy** : He went and chased the attacker.

 **ass ass in** : that idiot

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : what’s he supposed to do he’s like 2ft

 **ass ass in** : hoshi is 2ft and can still kick your ass

 **ryonya** : wow. thanks.

 **supreme snacc** : guess who just got knocked unconscious, robbed and left to rot in an alley!!

 **piano licker** : are you okay?!?

 **supreme snacc** : i am but the stab stab man is not!!

 **show itchy** : sometimes i wonder why i don’t just arrest you

 **suprmee snacc** : its cuz you loooovvveeee meeeeee ^3^

 **shoe tichy** : you seemed just fine with kaito yesterday

 **robot fucker** : holy shit he’s *really* fucken jealous

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : you know i wouldn’t steal your bf sidekick

 **shoe tuchy** : i know,, im sorry

 **supreme snacc** : that’s cute n all but can someone pick me up its rlly dark

 **alexa play despacito** : I shall come pick you up, Ouma-kun. I am on my way back from professor Idabashi!

 **supreme snacc** : thnx kiibabes <3

 **alexa play despacito** : You are welcome! <3

 **robot fucker** : everyone coming for your bf now _@shoe itchy_

 **shoe tichy** : shut up

 **robot fucker** : eeeeeeppppp okkk

 **piano licker** : oh no last time he was this jealous i stole his gf in kindergarten

 **ryonya** : you what

 **piano licker** : i stole his gf in kindergarten

 **ryonya** : kindergarten....

 **piano licker** : kindergarten yeah

 **boring** : i believe it is time for bed now

 **piano smoocher** : good night tojo-san!! <3

 **pretty lesbian** : good night tojo-san!!!

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : Good night!!~~

 **shoe itchy** : good night

**All users are offline**

**[11.56am]**

**worse than hell**

**stupid avocado** : i have been unstabbed

 **w-what are you doing stel-kamisama** : What a shame!!~~

 **supreme snacc** : cwongwats bwig bwoo!! uwuuwuwuwwuuwwuw

 **stupid avocado** : why couldn’t have anyone but you two answered

 **robot fucker** : how’d it feel to have something inside you?

 **stupid avocado** : *three

**supreme snacc changed stupid avocado to step-bro**

**step-bro** : no.

 **suprme snacc** : yes :)

**step-bro changed step-bro to stupid avocado**

**robot fucker** : so you admit you’re stupid

 **stupid avocado** : rather be stupid than a horny step bro

 **robot fuckdf** : HORNY STEP BRO NDJSNDSJNCSJNBajahaAHAHHAHAHAHAHAGSGSHABAHAHAHA

**supreme snacc changed robot fucker to the devil wants to dance**

**devil wants to dance** : HOLY FUCK YESS MNSSHBAABABBAWGAGAGAGAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH

 **alexa play despacito** : I don’t understand??

 **boring** : Good.

**supreme snacc changed alexa play despacito to roomba with a knife**

**supreme snacc changed boring to mother knows best**

**mother knows best** : Back to the mother names I see.

 **roomba with a knife** : This is incredibly robophobic! I will be contacting my lawyers if you don‘t publicly apologize!

 **supreme snacc** : ewwwwww nooo

 **roomba with a knife** : Fine. Privately works too.

 **supreme snacc** : no thnx babe <3

**supreme snacc is offline**

**roomba with a knife** : BABE?!?!!?!

 **shoe itchy** : you’re on my list.

 **ass ass in** : ill help you hide the body

 **roomba wirh a knife** : _AAAAHHHHH_

 **the devil wants to dance** : yknow maybe the problem is cock itchy and his need to flirt with all the guys and not the guys he flirts with

 **mother knows best** : So far, Amami, Shinguji and Momota have flirted back.

 **piano licker** : i know about momota but shinguji and amami???

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : WHAT

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : I HAVEN’T BEEN FLIRTING WITH OUMA

 **ass ass in** : _prepare to die._

**ass ass in is offline**

**starships were mean tto flyyy** : WAIT N

**starships were meant to flyyy is offline**

**w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : Goodbye Kaito!! We’ll miss you!!~~

 **robot fucker** : lmao he’s dead

 **supreme snacc** : do you think he died with a funny expression

 **stupid avocado** : let’s check

 **robot fucker** : and use his body for....... science..

**3 users are offline**

**nyeh nyeh** : *some of us will miss you

 **pretty lesbian** : stupid degenerate flirting with a degenerate

 **roomba with a knife** : _@robot fucker_ please don’t touch his body

 **piano licker** : did kokichi apologize yet

 **roomba with a knife** : kind of.......

 **roomba with a knife** :

> **king kokichi** : accept my apology
> 
> **kiibabe** : You didn’t apologize??
> 
> **king kokichi** : just imagine i did
> 
> **kiibabe** : Well, I’d like to hear an actual apology!
> 
> **king kokichi** : fine.......
> 
> **king kokichi** : i’m s*rry
> 
> **kiibabe** : Why did you censor “sorry”?
> 
> **king kokichi** : THIS IS HARD OK?!?!!
> 
> **kiibabe** : HOW IS APOLOGIZING HARD?!

**piano licker** : ah

 **roomba with a knife** : It continues for a few more hundred messages.

 **junko’s #1 fan** : a few hundred?!????!!???!

 **roomba with a knife** : Yes, that is what I said.

**supreme snacc changed roomba with a knife to kiibazinga**

**kiibazinga** : What.

 **piano licker** : bazinga??????????

 **stupid avocado** : that name is so random

 **stupid avocado** : i love it

 **the devil wants to dance** : holy shit dude that name is so fucking dumb

 **pretty lesbian** : of course the degenerate would make a dumb name for kiibo!!

 **the devil wants to dance** : wait twink virgin i just realized

 **supreme snacc** : i’m not a virgin but go on

 **mother knows best** : Please never open your mouth ever again.

 **supreme snacc** : how am i supposed to give shumai a blowjo

 **ass ass in** : i got rid of him

 **piano licker** : please say you didn’t kil him

 **ass ass in** : i didn’t

 **piano licker** : are you lying?

 **ass ass in** :

 **piano licker** :

**ass ass in is offline**

**shoe itchy** : he’s fine

 **the devil wants to dance** : oh thank god if he was dead his sugar daddy wouldn’t pay for our vacation

 **mother knows best** : Saihara-kun?

 **the devil wants to dance** : wtf no?? the avocado obv

 **shoe itchy** : kokichi if you ever need something just tell me ill buy anythign _@supreme snacc_

 **piano lciker** : whoa shu maybe not _everything_????

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : what are you doing to my sidekick _@suprmee snacc_ >:(

 **suprme snacc** : the emoticons are only cute when chabs does it

 **pretty kesbian** : with the knowledge that you’re bi this makes tenko incredibly uncomfortable

 **pretty kermit** : _@supreme snacc_ +1000000 degenerate

 **supreme snacc** : for being comfy with my sexuality?? ~.~

 **pretty lesbian** : FOR TALKING TO HIMIKO INAPPROPRIATELY

 **supreme snacc** : oh riighhttttt i forgot about that lmao

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : What’s this about a vacation?? Can Angie and her girlfriends come too??~~

 **the devil wants to dance** : fuck no

 **stupid avocado** : as long as you go to a diff country

 **stupid avocado** : no hard feelings

 **supreme snacc** : ew no

 **nyeh nyeh** : nyo

 **piano licker** : oh we’re going on vacation??

 **supreme snacc** : no me and my two sluts

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : me and shuichi??

 **suprem snacc** : wh

 **the devil wants to dance** : HOLY FUCKKCKCKCKD CJDNJNDJSSBUABSAHBAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAHABABAHSHAHSHAHAHAHA

 **stupid avocado** : are you trying to fire me from my “kokichi’s #1 slut” job momota??

 **starships were mean to flyyy** : maybe

 **ass ass in** : .......

 **starships were mean to flyyy** : *never ew gross who tf would want to do that 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

 **piano licker** : not you too

 **ass ass in** : that’s what i thought

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : we should go on a date tommorow!!

 **mother knows best** : We have school.

 **ass ass in** : i’m... busy

 **shoe ithcy** : with what?

 **ask ass in** : do you wanna die?

 **show itchy** : sorry i shouldn’t have asked

**ass ass in is offline**

**the devil wants to dance** : pay attention to our amazing vacation!!!!!!

 **piano licker** : have fun babe!! <3

 **the devil wants to dance** : we won’t be talking for a week and this is the last message you’ll send me⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ 🤬🤬🤬😡😡😡😡😒😒

 **stupid avocado** : omg heart been broke kiyo won’t say ily back 😔💔💔💔💔💔

 **supreme snacc** : shumaaaaiii notice me 😘😘😘🥰🥰😍😍😍😍🤩😜😜😳🥵🥵🥵🥴🥴🤡🤡🤣🤣🤣

 **creepy is weepy** : Why are you all like this?

 **stupid avocado** : ily kiyo baby sugar sweetheart love sweetie babe ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

 **creepy is weepy** : i regret dating you

 **stupid avocado** : 💔

 **creepy is weepy** : Love you too, goodnight.

**creepy is weepy is offline**

**stupid avocado** : 🥑🥑🥑❤️❤️

 **i can’t come up with anything fuck** : it day tho???

 **the devil wants to dance** : THE AVOCADO SUDNSUDNWUDNBABAHAHAHA

 **stupid avocado** : might as well embrace the avocado yknow

 **the devil wants to dance** : IT LOOKS LIKE THE AVOCADO VERSION OF 🤰🤰🤰🤰🤰

 **stupid avocado** : NO

 **piano licker** : see you in a week love you kichi <3

 **the devil wants to dance** : >:’(

 **supreme snacc** : awwww love you too yay-chan <3 <3

 **piano licker** : love you miu <3

 **the devil wants to dance** : ew

 **stupid avocado** : she’s so happy she’s crying

 **supreme snacc** : lmao loser

 **stupid avocado** : we’re leaving now

 **mother knows best** : Text us when you land.

 **supreme snacc** : oh did we forgot to sayyy

 **supreme snacc** : we won’t be able to hse our phones whoops

**3 users are offline**

**piano licker** : oh for fuck sake

 **pretty lesbian** : kaede!!!! >:O

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in case you didn’t understand miu’s new name: the devil wants to dance = devil’s tango = baby making (hopefully) without the baby 🥵 (i say hopefully bcs they’re teenagers)
> 
> step-bro, stupid avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> piano licker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> ryonya = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mother knows best, boring = Kirumi Tojo  
> w-what are you doing step-kamisama = Angie Yonaga  
> pretty lesbian= Tenko Chabashira  
> creepy is weepy = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> the devil wants to dance, robot fucker = Miu Iruma  
> i can’t come up with anything fuck = Gonta Gokuhara  
> supreme snacc = Kokichi Ouma  
> starships were meant to flyyy = Kaito Momota  
> junko’s #1 fan = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> kiibazinga, roomba with a knife, alexa play despacito = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> nyeh nyeh = Himiko Yumeno  
> shoe itchy = Shuichi Saihara


	26. twitter is wildd yall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this ain’t proofread we die like men 😗✌️
> 
> (fixed an important typo)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo yo watch out!!! cw/tw!!! ❗️ toxic fandom behavior + mentions of drugging someone (doesn’t happen)

**Hope’s Peak Exposed _@hopespeakexposed_**

“ _@supremeleader_ ‘s and _@notavocado_ ‘s former classmates say that they are dating with photos as proof. (The photos will not be shared until Kokichi and Rantaro make a public confirmation.) Hope’s Peak is just filled with secret relationships, isn’t it? Thoughts on this new info?”  
  


**10.6mil likes 45.9k retweets 19.9mil replies [12.34pm]**

**[12.33pm]**

**worse than hell**   
  


**ass ass in** : hope’s peak exposed made a new tweet

 **piano licker** : and they targeted kokichi and amami who are away for a week.......

 **ryonya** : if hope’s peak exposed is really in our class it was a pretty low blow

 **mother know best** : We’ll have to clear their names.

 **ass ass in** : does it matter that much anyway

 **ass ass in** : just let people believe what they want

 **shoe itchy** : i don’t want to let false information spread when we could stop it

 **ass ass in** : ouma and amami aren’t here to disprove the dating accusation

 **nyeh nyeh** : but we’re their friends so we can

 **pretty lesbian** : debatable.... >:/

**Kaede Akamatsu _@pianofreak_**

“Kokichi and Amami are on a vacation right now so I’ll be here to clear this for them. They’re not dating. Mind your own business please.”

  
**20.3k likes 9.7k retweets 1.1mil replies [12.37pm]**

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**kokichi’s harem _@kokichiiharem_**

“thank goodddd!!! i always liked oumota and ougoku wayyyy more!!!”  
  


**18.2k likes 259 retweets 25.8k replies [12.39pm]**

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**yaoi hell _@proudfujoshi_**

“saiouma is obvv better!!”  
  


**19.7k likes 699 retweets 17.8k replies [12.43pm]**

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**haru _@killallfuhoshis_**

“wtf gross,, stop with that gay shit ship something normal like hinanami or saimatsu”  
  


**5.4k likes 132 retweets 7.9k replies [12.44pm]**

**[12.50pm]**

**worse than hell**

**piano licker** : i’m deleting twitter

 **ryonya** : i deleted it a month ago

 **mother knows best** : What happened? I haven’t had time to read responses.

 **creepy is weepy** : Everyday I hate humanity more.

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : funny how you thought humanity was beatiful until you met us

 **kiibazinga** : *Beautiful.

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : dude......

 **kiibazinga** : Should I not correct your spelling mistakes?

 **ass ass in** : don’t stop he needs to learn how to write

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : your so meen maki rull :((

  
  


**[2.54pm]**

**worse than hell**

**junko’s #1 fan** : is kaede ok????

 **junko’s #1 fan** : she’s been laughing for 2 hours gay

 **pretty lesbian** : did someone drug her??? which degenerate was it i’ll kill them!!!!! D:<

 **morher knows best** : I believe she is laughing at Momota-kun.

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : :(

 **creepy is weepy** : I laughed too. His entire existence is hilarious.

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : :(((

 **mother knows best** : Kokichi would love this, I’m sure.

 **ass ass in** : everyone stop laughing

 **w-what are you doing step-kaitosama** : How quiet!! Even Kami-sama is shocked!!~~

 **creepy is weepy** : Akamatsu is still laughing.

 **ass ass in** : stop laughing _@piano licker_

 **ass ass in** : seriously it’s not even that funny

 **piano licker** : never

 **shoe itchy** : maki please stop choking kaede

 **w-what are you doing step-kaedesama** : Kinky!!~~

 **ass ass in** : you’re next

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : angie advises against that.

 **nyeh nyeh** : did

 **nyeh nyeh** : did akaamtsu stop laughing out of fear without even seeing the message......

 **nyeh nyeh** : such a long text

 **nyeh nyeh** : i’m sleepy now

 **pretty lesbian** : you can sleep on me himiko!!!!!! (*^o^*)

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : Aww!! You’re so cute Tenko!!~~

 **pretty oesbian** : nduwdnwudnwu compliemtn ahsnswuhx >///////<

 **piano licker** : same girl

 **kiibazinga** : You want compliments?

 **piano lciker** : well ye but not what i meant

 **kiibazinga** : You are very beautiful and talented, Akamatsu!

 **i can’t come up with anything fuck** : kaede very nice and always help gonta look for bugs!!!

 **junko’s #1 fan** : of course he comes online just to be wholesome

 **i can’t come up with anything** : should gonta leave?? :(

 **ass ass in** : ignore her you’re prefect just the way you are

 **junko’s #1 fan** : WAIT I MEANT IT AS A PLAINLY POSITIVE AND CUTE THI

**junko’s #1 fan is offline**

**w-what are you doign step-kamisama** : Aar aii piiii Tsum tsum your boobs were huge!!~~

 **piano licker** : i’ll mis them..

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : at least matsus gf is not here to see this

 **pretty lesbian** : YOU DEGEENARTE HOW DARE YOU MAKE NICKNAMES FOR KAEDE I BET YOU’E TRYIGN TO EANR THE RTRIST SO YOU CAN TAKE ADVANTEGE AOF HER!!!!1!1!1!1!1!1!11!!1!1!11!!2!11!!12!2{¥]¥]¥ >:(

 **starships were to flyyy** : im scrared

 **ryonya** : never seen anyone type that fast before

 **ass ass in** : are you still doing the stupid emoticon thing _@pretty lesbian_

 **pretty lesbian** : himiko and angie like it (^з^)-☆

 **piano licker** : i like it too it’s really cute!!

 **pretty lesbian** : you’re cute too kaede!! (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀) <3 <3

 **ass ass in** : you’re ok

 **piano licker** : stopppp you’re making me fall for you even harderrr

 **mother knows best** : Don’t you have a girlfriend?

 **piano licker** : shhhhhh it’s fine she flirts with kokichi all the time

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : THAT’S FLIRTING?!?!?!?!?!

**[11.28pm]**

**worse than hell**

**creepy is weepy** : Are we not going to talk about the Hope’s Peak exposed tweet?

 **ass ass in** : we already did

**[LOVELY BONUS TWEETS (as sorry for having an inconsistent schedule for this fic and cut i can)]**

**Hiyoko Saionji _@bananawig_**

“can’t believe oumami is real totally thought the hottie was fucking the pianist”  
  


**6.1mil likes 12.9k retweets 10.4mil replies [9.21am]**

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**your local horny chef _@teruteru_**

“which one is she fucking?? asking for a friend ;)”  
  


**1.2mil likes 11.1k retweets 492k replies [9.25am]**

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**Kaede Akamatsu _@pianofreak_**

“both -3o”  
  


**10.2mil likes 294k retweets 999k replies [9.30am]**

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**fuck baseball all my homes hate baseball _@succontheseballs_**

**|** “HOLY SHIT DUDE”  
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**2.8mil likes 109k retweets 21.7k replies [9.32am]**

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**Kirumi Tojo _@ultmommy_**

“Why did you do this Akamatsu?”  
  


**1.1mil likes 17.2k retweets 9.2k replies [9.32am]**

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**Shuichi Saihara _@ultdetective_**

“kaede please......”  
  


**1mil likes 9.8k retweets 10.2k replies [9.40am]**

  
  


**gremlin child _@supremeleader_**

“if a had a penny for every time i fell in love with a guy when they smiled at me i’d be the richest bitch on this planet”  
  


**29.1mil likes 9.5mil retweets 50.7mil replies [4 years ago]**

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**gorgeous girl genius _@hotnsexybabe_**

“HOLY FUCK YOU’RE GAY”  
  


**2.8mil likes 299k retweets 821k replies [3 months ago]**

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**gremlin child _@supremeleader_**

“YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO FIND THIS IT’S 4 YEARS OLD HHHHHHH”  
  


**2.9 likes 212k retweets 209k replies [3 months ago]**

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**Kaito Momota!! _@luminaryofthestars_**

“i’m scared of smiling now”  
  


**3.9mil 62k retweets 12.2k replies [3 months ago]**

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**Kaede Akamatsu _@pianofreak_**

“i see you smiling _@ultdetective_ you ain’t slick”  
  


**9.2mil likes 298k retweets 291k replies [3 months ago]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> before anyone asks, all the classes are very close so hiyoko and teruteru felt comfortable enough to joke about it (also hope’s peak exposed posts a lot relationship drama/speculation so they’re used to it)
> 
> AND this was before kokichi figured out he was bi so that’s why miu calls him gay andmthe tweets are old so kichi, miu and taro are still on vacation
> 
> stupid avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> piano licker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> ryonya = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mother knows best, boring = Kirumi Tojo  
> w-what are you doing step-kamisama = Angie Yonaga  
> pretty lesbian= Tenko Chabashira  
> creepy is weepy = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> the devil wants to dance = Miu Iruma  
> i can’t come up with anything fuck = Gonta Gokuhara  
> supreme snacc = Kokichi Ouma  
> starships were meant to flyyy = Kaito Momota  
> junko’s #1 fan = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> kiibazinga = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> nyeh nyeh = Himiko Yumeno  
> shoe itchy = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> @hopespeakexposed = ??  
> @pianofreak = Kaede Akamatsu  
> @kokichiiharem = ?? (unimportant)  
> @proudfujoshi = ?? (unimportant  
> @killallfujoshis = ?? (unimportant)  
> @bananawig = Hiyoko Saionji  
> @teruteru = Teruteru Hanamura  
> @succontheseballs = Leon Kuwata  
> @ultmommy = Kirumi Tojo  
> @ultdetective = Shuichi Saihara  
> @supremeleader = Kokichi Ouma  
> @notavocado = Rantaro Amami  
> @hotnsexybabe = Miu Iruma  
> @luminaryofthestars = Kaito Momota


	27. never read *the* ouma piss fic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cw! THE ouma piss fic mention multiple times please im begging don’t read it
> 
> i hope the fluffy lesbians can make up for it
> 
> i feel conflicted about this chapter.....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> word of advice: never EVER read *the* ouma piss fic i nearly cried when i read it it was worse than i thought i could barely get through the first chapter i only read 4
> 
> I SAW COMMENTS LIKE: OMG I GOT A BONNERRRR THIS SO HOT OMG
> 
> WHYYYYYYYYYY
> 
> if you’re the author and you made the fic or have read the fic and ENJOYED it please go rethink your life decisions and never ever interact with me ever
> 
> you can still read this fic if you want to but i’d prefer not interacting with you please!!!

**[7.12pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**piano licker** : ah how i’ll miss autumn

 **junko’s #1 fan** : i won’t

 **pretty lesbian** : why not?? (*⁰▿⁰*)

 **ass ass in** : quit it already

 **petty lesbian** : ...ok

 **piano licker** : >:(

 **nyeh nyeh** : i’ll curse you,,,

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisam** a: _angie doesn’t like that._

 **ass ass in** : fine.

 **ass** **ass** **in** : sorry that came out meaner than intended

 **pretty lesbian** : tenko accepts your apology!

 **nyeh nyeh** : you should use the emoticins again,,,,

 **pretty lesbian** : tenko doesn’t want to

 **pretty lesbian** : they were annoying anyway

**pretty lesbian is offline**

**piano licker** : tenko.....

 **nyeh nyeh** : i will curse you with a bad hairday for the rest of your life _@ass ass in_

 **ass ass in** : i’ll go apologize in person..

**ass ass in is offline**

**starships were meant to flyyy** : yknow it’s really peaceful here now that iruma and kokichi are gone

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : amami coulda stayed

 **boring** : Honestly, they should go on vacation more.

 **junko’s #1 fan** : i am regretting every single thing i’ve done that lead to me reading _that_ fic

 **piano licker** : what fic???

 **junko’s #1 fan** : the ouma piss fic..............

 **starships were mean to flyyy** : WHAT THE FUCKK

 **ass ass in** : _WHAT_.

 **nyeh nyeh** : what the nyeh did you just say _*all capital letters*_

 **pretty lesbian** : WHAT KIND OF DEGENERATE WOULD

 **w-what are you dong step-kamisama** : Angie hates that!! Burn it with fire!!~~

 **piano licker** : i give up on the internet

 **ryonya** : i hate everyone

 **show itchy** : what the genuine fuck

 **creepy is weepy** : Humanity is truly disgusting.

 **boring** : Please never ever utter those words again.

 **kiibazinga** : I wish I was not created anymore.

 **boring** : We will not mention this fic to Kokichi, understood?

 **junko’s #1 fan** : he knows about it

 **shoe itchy** : and the fic is still up and available???

 **junko’s #1 fan** : the author blackmailed him i think???

 **piano licker** : seriously?? with what??

 **junko’s #1 fan** : he wouldn’t tell me

 **creepy is weepy** : I would prefer if we pretended this fic does not exist.

 **shoe itchy** : i’d prefer that too

 **junko’s #1 fan** : he pissed on your bed in the first chapter

 **piano licker** : WHY WOULD YOU

 **boring** : Do us all a favor and ban yourself.

 **junko’s #1 fan** : the only ones with admin are on vacation

 **i can’t come up with anthing fuck** : kokichi pee on shuichi’s bed??

 **piano licker** : NO

 **shoe itchy** : NO

 **i can’t come up with aynthing fuck** : why tsumugi say so??

 **junko’s #1 fan** : i would plainly never ever say that!!

**junko’s #1 fan deleted one message**

**junko’s #1 fan** : see??

 **i can’t come up with aynthing fuck** : oh gonta see!!

 **ryomya** : where are you _@junko’s #1 fan_

 **ryonya** : i just wanna talk

 **junko’s #1 fan** : NO PLEASE D

**junko’s #1 fan is offline**

**creepy is weepy** : Finally.

 **kiibazinga** : Let’s all agree to never tell Iruma about _that_ fic.

 **nyeh nyeh** : _@pretty lesbian @w-what are you doing step-kamisama_

 **nyeh nyeh** : im sick

 **pretty lesbian** : TENKO IS COMING

**peetty lesbian is offline**

**w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : Kami-sama will cure you if you pray hard enough!!~~

 **nyeh nyeh** : >:T

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : But Angie will come!!~~

**w-what are you doing step-kamisama is offline**

**boring** : Would you like some tea and chicken soup, Yumeno?

 **nyeh nyeh** : no thnx

**nyeh nyeh is offline**

**piano licker** : i wish i could bleach my eyes

 **shoe itchy** : same

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : i regret reading that

 **kiibazinga** : Did you three read the fic?

 **ass ass in** : four

 **creepy is weepy** : You absolute buffoons.

 **piano licker** : WHY WOULD IT TRY TO BE CUTE YET SO DISGUSTING AT THE SAME TIME?!?!}!!

* * *

“How are you feeling, Himi?” Chabashira asks for the fifth time.

“I still feel like nyeh.” Yumeno answers groggily.

“Is that good or bad?” Yumeno huffs.

“Bad.” She answers.

“Maybe you should sleep, Himiko! Kami-sama says that a glass of water and some sleep will get you better in no time!!” Yonaga says from above the sick girl.

“M’kay.” Yumeno yawns, falling asleep.

“Angie, what will we do? Tenko hates seeing Himiko like this!” Chabashira’s grip on Yumeno’s hand tightens.

“Relax, Tenko. She will be fine. It’s just a little flu!” Yonaga hugs Chabashira from behind.

“You’re right. Tenko was overreacting.”

“If it’ll make you feel better, we can sleep with Himiko for the night!” Angie grins, jumping onto the bed, nearly falling onto to Yumeno.

“Be more careful!” Chabashira yells but joins the two girls in bed nonetheless.

When the clock on Yumeno’s night stand displays 12.27am, said girl finally wakes up.

“Good morning, Himiko!” Yonaga whispers.

“Morning.” Yumeno yawns.

“Don’t speak too loudly!” Yonaga chirps quietly. When Yumeno gives Yonaga a questioning glance, the white haired girl points at the sleeping Chabashira.

“She had been super worried about you! Isn’t she adorable?”

“Yeah.” Yumeno yawns again.

“You should sleep, Himiko! You look tired...” Yonaga yawns as well.

“Wait.. I need to talk to you..”

“We are already talking, silly!”

“Nyeh, that’s not what i meant.”

“Angie was just teasing you! So? What do you want to talk about?”

“We should make us official.”

The silence Yumeno got in return made her uncomfortable.

“Hm?~ Official? As in, dating official?” Yumeno nods. “Angie thought we were already official! We’re dating Tenko, yes?”

“I want us to date too.” Yumeno says bluntly, though the blush was starting to creep up on her face.

“Oh! Sure, sure! That could be fun!” Yonaga grins, giving Yumeno a peck before reaching over Yumeno to hold Chabashira’s hand.

“Night..” Yumeno says lazily, too tired to try and process what just happened.

The next morning, Chabashira had to take care of both her sick girlfriends.

“We should get sick more often.” Yumeno suggests.

“Angie agrees!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sick cough cough
> 
> only reason i made the lesbians (and the questioning mage) be sick was so i wouldn’t have to suffer alone 
> 
> i didn’t even make them suffer smh
> 
> stupid avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> piano licker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> ryonya = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mother knows best, boring = Kirumi Tojo  
> w-what are you doing step-kamisama = Angie Yonaga  
> pretty lesbian= Tenko Chabashira  
> creepy is weepy = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> the devil wants to dance = Miu Iruma  
> i can’t come up with anything fuck = Gonta Gokuhara  
> supreme snacc = Kokichi Ouma  
> starships were meant to flyyy = Kaito Momota  
> junko’s #1 fan = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> kiibazinga = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> nyeh nyeh = Himiko Yumeno  
> shoe itchy = Shuichi Saihara


	28. FINALLY SOME CONFLICT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oooooo drama ;)

**[7.45pm]**

**worse than hell**

**junko’s #1 fan** : WHA

 **piano licker** : i am scarred for life

 **boring** : Did you continue reading _the_ fic?

 **piano licker** : even worse :)

 **piano licker** : excuse me as i go fucking vomit today’s breakfast and lunch out of my system :)

**piano licker is offline**

**ass ass in** : i’ll go check on her

**ass ass in is offline**

**junko’s #1 fan** : i need physical contact and a therapist

 **boring** : You already have a therapist.

 **junko’s #1 fan** : i need another

 **boring** : I can offer the physical contact but you’ll have to wait for your next therapy session.

 **ass ass in** : what the genuine fuck did you make kaede listen to

 **junko’s #1 fan** : I DIDN’T THINK IT WAS GOING TO BE AS BAD AS IT WAS

 **ass ass in** : DID YOU NOT READ THE FUCKING TAGS?!

 **junko’s #1 fan** : i did..

 **ryonya** : what the fuck even happened

_**DELETED MESSAGE** _

**supreme snacc** : _what_

 **the devil wants to dance** : what the fuck

 **stupid avocado** : i crave death

 **the devil wants to dance** : so did kokichi’s cock

**supreme snacc banned the devil wants to dance**

**junko’s #1 fan** : oh hi kokichi didn’t know you were going to be back so soon!!!

**supreme snacc banned junko’s #1 fan**

**supreme snacc** : shuichi open your fucking door

**supreme snacc is offline**

**shoe itchy** : o-ok

**shoe itvhy is offline**

**stupid avocado** : _the stutter_

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : I hate humanity so much!! I hope it crashes and burns!!~~

 **creepy is weepy** : I can’t help but agree with you, Angie.

 **nyeh nyeh** : humanity is a mistake

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : whyre yall acting like youre not humans??

 **w-what are you doing step-kamisama** : :)

 **creepy is weepy** : Of course we aren’t.

 **nyeh nyeh** : duh im a mage

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : uh g-guys they’re lying r-right....?

**10 users are offline**

**starships were meant to flyyy** : GUYS?!?!?!

 **w-what are you doing ste-kamisama** : （╹◡╹）▄︻̷̿┻̿═━一

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : **_AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH_**

**4 users are offline**

**[8.32pm]**

**worse than hell**

**ass ass in** : oh god kaede’s broken

 **ass ass in** : she keeps singing im blue dabadibadadai quietly while sobbing in the shower

 **shoe itchy** : just tuck her into bed and give her a goodnights kiss and she should be fine the next morning

 **ass ass in** : no

 **stupid avocado** : welp now that i’m here might as well

 **ryonya** : might as well what?

 **stupid avocado** : might as well

 **ryonya** : _might as well what_

 **stupid avocado** : might as w

**2 users are offline**

**ass ass in** : what do i do with kaede help

 **supreme snacc** : oh wow she’s actually asking for help!!

 **ass ass in** : not from your twink ass

 **supreme snacc** : bitch >:(

 **ass ass in** : slut

 **stupid avocado** : really taking the role of akamatsu’s girlfriend arent you

 **ass ass in** : do you wanna die?

 **stupid avocado** : three times is enough

 **shoe itchy** : _three?_

**stupid avocado unbanned 2 users**

**stupid avocado added 2 users**

**Miu Iruma** : FUCKING FINALLY

 **supreme snacc** : sooo harumaki-chaaannnn

 **ass ass in** : don’t call me that you little shit

 **Miu Iruma** : ONLY I’M ALLOWED TO CALL HIM A LITTLE SHIT, BITCH

 **supreme snacc** : stfu im talking to no tits over here

 **Miu Iruma** : mage or two ass

 **supreme snacc** : 2 aß

 **Miu Iruma** : k continue

 **supreme snacc** : sooo harumaki-chann

 **ass ass in** : don’t call me that

 **szpreme snacc** : STFU

 **show tichy** : just come back to bed kokichi...

 **supreme snacc** : we’re cuddling in your bed right now shu

 **shoe itchy** : i missed you

 **suprmeme snacc** : NO ONE IS LETTTING ME FINISH

 **ass ass in** : good

 **Miu Iruma** : gimme admin

**supreme snacc gave 1 user admin**

**Miu Iruma muted 14 users for 20 seconds**

**Miu Iruma** : hurry

 **supreme snacc** : howidiyoujnowkayaydaywassingingimbluedabidabibdq

 **Miu Iruma** : wtf

 **stupid avocado** : translation: how did you know kayayday was singing im blue dabi dabi bbq

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : DID SOMEONE SAY DABI?!

 **stupid avocado** : you’re hallucinating

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : makes sense!

**Tsumugi Shirigane is offline**

**ass ass in** : i heard her singing it

 **supreme snacc** : but she was singing quietly riiiighhhtttt

 **suoreme snacc** : so you had to be int he same room to hear her

 **ass ass in** : i

 **shoe itchy** : scandalous

 **Miu Iruma** : ARE YOU TRYING TO STEAL MY GIRLFRIEND MRS STAB STAB?!?!

 **piano licker** : hey!! IM mrs stab stab! maki is mr stab stab!!

 **Miu Iruma** : THEY’RE MARRIED

 **i can’t come up with anything fuck** : oh congratulations!!!!

 **ryonya** : don’t congratulate them

 **i can’t come up with anything fuck** : uncongratulations!!

 **piano licker** : never change

 **Miu Iruma** : yknow im not feeling fucking loved right now

 **piano licker** : you know i love you miu <3

 **Miu Iruma** : really?!?!

 **Miu Iruma** : cuz it looks like you love harufuck more than me!!

 **Miu Iruma** : i was gone for an entire week but you didn’t even greet me when i came back!!

 **piano licker** : i was ....busy

 **Miu Iruma** : with fucking harushit?!

 **piano licker** : i wouldn’t cheat on you miu!! i love you more than anyone!

 **Miu Iruma** : i dont believe you

 **Miu Iruma** : we’ve barely talked for 3 weeks bcs youve been too busy with your new girlfriend

 **Miu Iruma** : i need a fucking break from you

**Miu Iruma left worse than hell**

**piano licker** : i fucked up

 **shoe itvhy** : calm down kaede you both need rest

 **shoe tichy** : you can talk in the morning

 **piano licker** : i ruined everything

 **supreme snacc** : she’ll get over it just go to sleep

 **piano licker** : im

**piano licker is offline**

**stupid avocado** : you think she’ll be ok...?

 **shoe itchy** : i honestly don’t know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ß = ss (just in case you didn’t know :D)
> 
> i kinda think miu’s in the wrong here for overreacting but then again kaede and her havent talked for awhile and they’re supposed to be dating
> 
> stupid avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> piano licker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> ryonya = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mother knows best, boring = Kirumi Tojo  
> w-what are you doing step-kamisama = Angie Yonaga  
> pretty lesbian= Tenko Chabashira  
> creepy is weepy = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> (Miu Iruma = Miu Iruma)  
> i can’t come up with anything fuck = Gonta Gokuhara  
> supreme snacc = Kokichi Ouma  
> starships were meant to flyyy = Kaito Momota  
> Tsumugi Shirogane = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> kiibazinga = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> nyeh nyeh = Himiko Yumeno  
> shoe itchy = Shuichi Saihara


	29. why cant i make interesting chaptersss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bitches getting insecure and hating their chatfics bcs it’s so unfunny and everyone else does it better  
> it’s me im bitches 😻😜😳
> 
> just pretend this chapter doesn’t exist and that miu and kaede got together behind the scenes or smth idk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> strip club
> 
> stripper = Rantaro Amami  
> moody pussy = Miu Iruma  
> pole dancer = Kokichu Ouma  
> the bartender =Tsumugi Shirogane
> 
> shuichi’s harem
> 
> shaving my piano = Kaede Akamatsu  
> 6 inch rocket = Kaito Momota  
> knifey wifey = Maki Harukawa  
> harem protag = Shuichi Saihara

**[3.20am]**

**strip club**

**pole dancer changed a regular to moody pussy**

**moody pussy** : im not fucking moody

 **pole dancer** : you havent made a sex joke in way too long

 **pole dancer** : im worried

 **pole dancer** : *not worried

 **moody pussy** : so what if i havent made a sex joke since me and bakamatsu broke up??!

 **stripper** : wow last name

 **the bartender** : WAIT YOU BROKE UP?!?!?!?!?!?!

 **moody pussy** : thanks for adding salt to the fuckign wound asshole

 **stripper** : werent you reading the chat

 **the bartender** : YOU SAID I WAS HALLUCINATING!!!!!

 **pole dancer** : and you believed it?? ok dumb bitch

 **the bartender** : why do you hate me so much

 **pole dancer** : :)

 **stripper** : ok you know what

 **stripper** : miu go make up and out with your gf

 **stripper** : kichi and tsumugi you two are going to get over the little hatred thing you have going on

 **pole dancer** : no

 **moody pussy** : no

 **the bartender** : sounds plainly amazing!!

 **moody pussy** : we broke up remember??!!?

 **pole dancer** : i dont wanna talk to dumb shirogane >:((

 **the bartender** : i understand...

**the bartender is offline**

**stripper** : oh my fucking god i am going to explode

 **moody pussy** : i hope you fucking do avodick

**moody pussy is offline**

**pole damcer** : geez drama queens am i right

 **stripper** : i hate you

 **pole dancer** : omg same

**[3.22am]**

**shuichi’s harem**

**shaving my piano** : im sorry.....

 **knifey wifey** : you have nothing to be sorry about

 **knifey wifey** : iruma is just a bitch

 **6 inch rocket** : maki roll!!

 **harem protag** : im not siding with anyone but

 **knifey wifey** : .....

 **harem protag** : please don’t kill me before i even finish

 **knifey widey** : continue....

 **harem protag** : iruma overreacted but kaede has been a bit more distant toward her lately

 **6 inch rocket** : well ye they broke up

 **harem protag** : before they broke up

 **shaving my piano** : i knew it im a horrible girlfriend

 **knifey wifey** : im coming to your dorm

**2 users are offline**

**6 inch rocket** : maybe we should lock them in a closet

 **6 inch rocket** : it worked with chabs and yumeno

 **harem protag** : that

 **harem protag** : actually doesn’t sound that bad

 **6 inch rocket** : yeeee

* * *

Iruma and Akamatsu sat in the very same closet Yumeno and Chabashira got together in.

“I’m sorry.” Both blurted out at the same time.

“The fuck are _you_ sorry for?” Iruma huffs. “I broke up with you without even trying to talk it out first, because I..” Iruma sniffs, wiping the tears from her eyes with her sleeve. “I don’t fucking know.”   
  
“I’m sorry because I’ve been a bad girlfriend. For the past 3 weeks I’ve been distancing myself from you and barely even talked to you.” Akamatsu intertwines their fingers together.

“You don’t have to always talk to me just ‘cause we’re dating.” Iruma says.

“I know, but I took it a bit too far without even realizing. I’m sorry.” Akamatsu smiles.

“I’m sorry too.” Iruma places her free hand on Akamatsu’s cheek.

And then they passionately make out 😗✌️  
  


* * *

**[5.51am]**

**worse than hell**

**supreme snacc** : MY EYEEESSSSSS MY VIRGIN EYESSSSSSSSSS

 **stupid avocado** :

 **supreme snacc** : *non virgin eyes ;)

 **shoe itchy** : please stop flirting with my bf

 **stupid avocado** : is that a challenge

 **creepy is weepy** : If you wish to lose your kneecaps.

 **stupid avocado** : lmao jusst kidding ew gross why would i flirt with a 10 yr old 🤮🤮🤢🤡

 **supreme snacc** : you dated one before why not again ;)

 **stupid avocado** : NO

 **pretty lesbian** : how dare you degenerates talk like this while kaede and iruma are sad!!!!

 **piano licker** : why would i be sad??

 **ryonya** : because of the break up??

 **piano licker** : what break up??

 **piano licker** : id never break up with miu <3 <3

 **starships were meant to flyyy** : is she in denial????

**supreme snacc added Miu Iruma**

**supreme snacc gave 1 user admin**

**Miu Iruma** : _|| id never break up with miu <3 <3_

 _@piano licker_ love you <3 <3 <3

 **piano licker** : awww miuu 💖💘💞💕💕💕

 **mother knows best** : what the fuck happened while i was asleep

 **supreme snacc** : revolution

**[9.38am]  
**

**worse than hell**

**supreme snacc** : name changing!!

 **shoe itchy** : oh no

**supreme snacc changed 16 names**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stupid avocado = Rantaro Amami  
> piano licker = Kaede Akamatsu  
> ryonya = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mother knows best, boring = Kirumi Tojo  
> w-what are you doing step-kamisama = Angie Yonaga  
> pretty lesbian= Tenko Chabashira  
> creepy is weepy = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> Miu Iruma = Miu Iruma  
> i can’t come up with anything fuck = Gonta Gokuhara  
> supreme snacc = Kokichi Ouma  
> starships were meant to flyyy = Kaito Momota  
> Tsumugi Shirogane = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> kiibazinga = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> ass ass in = Maki Harukawa  
> nyeh nyeh = Himiko Yumeno  
> shoe itchy = Shuichi Saihara


	30. um idk dude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey hey heyyy all text underlined is in english (or written with english letters) while the rest of it is in ””””japanese”””” cuz they’re from japan so most of them are not the best in english  
> (i dont know how good actual real people from japan are at understanding/speaking the english language so sorry if this comes off as offensive or as me dumbing down japanese people)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> google translate name idea by H3LL_JUSTH3LL (sorry i changed the names again in the middle of the chapter underlining every name got tiring ú.ù)
> 
> column sweetness = Rantaro Amami  
> change so red wait = Kaede Akamatsu  
> mito place to cut = Kirumi Tojo  
> long night = Angie Yonaga  
> roll call tea pillar = Tenko Chabashira  
> at the time of clean bedding = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> luma for sale = Miu Iruma  
> small base king = Kokichi Ouma  
> with the meeting hyakuta = Kaito Momota  
> wheat platinum = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> tree warts = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> roll spring leather = Maki Harukawa  
> most original species = Shuichi Saihara

**[12.37pm]**

**worse than hell**

**  
small base king** : suck a dick _@ column sweetness_

 **column sweetness** : k

 **column sweetness** : @

 **column sweetness** : wait whos kiyo

 **at the time of clean bedding** : Me.

 **column sweetness** : _@at the time of clean bedding_ ;)

 **at the time of clean bedding** : No.

 **change so red wait** : what are these names.......

 **luma for sale** : more importantly what fucken language is this shit?!?!?!

 **small base king** : you dont know??

 **small base king** : and i thought you said youre smart

 **luma for sale** : I AM A GENIUS

 **luma for sale** : I DONT NEED TO KNOW SOME DUMB LANGUAGE NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT

 **mito place to cut** : It’s English.

 **luma for sale** :

 **with the meeting hyakuta** : the names make no sense even in english tho???

 **with the meeting hyakuta** : what the heck is a luma for sale?????

 **small base king** : miu iruma of course

 **luma for sale** : I’M NOT A FUCKING LUMA

 **change so red wait** : what is a luma

 **small base kimg** : lmao absolutely no idea

 **tree warts** : luma /ˈluːma/

_noun_

1\. a monetary unit of Armenia, equal to one hundredth of a dram.

**tree warts** : There you go!

**change so red wait** : never change

**mito place to cut** : Are you insulting yourself with your name? _@ small base king_

**small base king** : i don’t want to hear that from someone who’s a mito place to cut

**mito place to cut** : You named me this.

**small base king** : whaaaaaattttt?!?!?!? no waaaayyyyyyy

**small base king** : blame guuble translate

**with the meetung hyakuta** : you used google translate???

**most original specie** s: couldn’t you have just translated our names normally????

**small base king** : no <3

**wheat platinum** : rantaro i plainly doubt this will work please just let us out

**most original species** : i swear to god if you locked someone in the closet again

**long night** : *Kami-sama!!~~

**most original species** : swear to that too

**column sweetness** : it was miu

**luma for sale** : IT WAS YOUR IDEA CUNT BAG

**cumomn sweetness** : no idea what you’re talking about

**most original species** : just let them out....

**luma for sale** : nah

**roll spring leather** : i’ll make you let them out

**luma for sale** : whered we lock em again

**clumn sweetness** : weak

**[3.09pm]**

**worse than hell**

**luma for sale gave admin to 1 user**

**change so red wait muted 15 users for 20 minutes**

**change so red wait changed 16 user names**

**christmas carol** : i was getting sick of the english names

**christmas carol** : i can hear you shirogane stop complaining about the multiple name changes in 1 chapter

**christmas carol** : anyway the point of this iss

**christmas carol** : we’re having a christmas party/sleepover/hangout!!!

**christmas carol** : itll be a week or two before christmas day so you can spend it at home with your family

**christmas carol** : i hope this’ll be more succesful than the halloween party

**christmas carol** : there was so much alcohol........

**christmas carol** : right so just our class and secret santa!!

**christmas carol** : when i unmute we’ll discuss the date

**christmas carol** : going off topic results in you being uninvited >:(

**chirstmas carol umuted 15 users**

**purple grape** : wow i am going off topic right noww

**purple grape** : wait wtf is my name

**green grape** : ayyyy

**purple grape** : after the shit you pulled i aint ayyyy-ing with you

**green grape** : ill give you panta

**purple grape** : ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

**blueberry** : did you really just bribe him to ayy

**purple grape** : shumaiiiii??????? is that youuu???

**blueberry** : yep

**purple grape** : i cant stop thinking about you in a blueberry suit now

**green grape** : NYJSNSJASNAISSM BLUEBERRY SUIT

**blueberry** : please dont imagine that

**chirstmas carol** : >:(

**purple grape** : wow cant stop thinking abt those christmas party things i should discuss

**green grape** : chirstmas so amazing i did not judt order a blueberry suit

**blueberry** : i hate you both

**purple grape** : love you too babe <3 <3

**christmas carol** : **> :(**

**jingle bells** : im free all week

**green grope** : who are you??

**jingle bells** : cant you recognize the gorgeous girl genius?!?!

**purple grape** : oohhh i undertand her name!!!

**purple grape** : jingle bells like her tits!!!

**blueberry** : that makes no sense

**jingle bells** : HHHHIIIIIIIIHHJHHHHEHEHE

**kitty** : _iruma_.....

**kitty** :

**kitty** : what the fuck is my name

**good boy!!** : gonta like it!! ryomas name cute!!!

**kitty** : my name’s perfect i love it more than myself

**christmas carol** : are you ok

**kitty** : no

**santa cosplay** : what a mood

**santa cosplay** : what is this name

**christmas carol** : do you like it??

**santa cosplay** : only because you’re plainly cute

**christmas carol** : aww thnx

**jingle bells** : .....

**chirstmas carol** : yknow i love you most <3 <3

**chirstmas carol changed jingle bells to loveliest girl**

**loveliest girl** : ew youre making me go soft <3

**green grape** : the heart really proves your point

**loveliest girl** : stfu avocunt

**green grape** : just when i thought i escaped the avocado names

**purple grape** : never <3

**chirstmas carol** : THE PARTY

**mrs claus** : Everyone, let’s plan the Christmas party and then we can talk about something else.

**mrs claus** : .......At least my name isn’t mother related again.

**chirtmas carol** : i was tempted to just name you mom

**mrs claus** : I’m glad your desire to live won over your temptation.

**chirstmas carol** : wh

**blueberry** : im going home 5 days before christmas so im free for the party to be before then

**mrs claus** : I will be leaving on Sunday.

**purple grape** : im free whenever

**green grape** : im leaving sunday evening

**kitty** : free whenever

**good boy!!** : gonta free all chirstmas!!

**bot on a pot** : I am leaving next week.

**bot on a pot** : This name is incredibly robophobic!! I expected better from you Akamatsu!!

**purple grape** : i can make you a new one ;)

**bot on a pot** : ......Never mind.

**holiday spirit** : Angie is free for the whole week!! Next week Angie is leaving thoo!!~~

**chirtmas carol** : do you even celebrate chirstmas??

**holiday spirit** : Nope!! But Angie wants to have fun with her friends!!~~

**mrs claus** : We could make the party be less Christmas themed if you’d like.

**holiday spirit** : No no!! Angie wants to learn the Christmas tradition you all have!! Kami-sama will be pleased with the new info!!~~

**santa cosplay** : wouldn’t he already know about everything though???

**holiday spirit** : You’re next!!~~

**santa cosplay** : im scared

**purple grape** : are you gonna tell us when youre free or not??

**santa cosplay** : right sorry

**santa cosplay** : im leaving next weeks wednesday

**all i want for chirstmas** : IS YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

**sleepy child** : what r u doing???

**all i want for christmas** : my name!!!! :D

**sleepy child** : o

**purple grape** : just o

**sleepy child** : i wish 4 ouma to disappear this xmas

**good boy!!** : gonta no want kokichi to disappear!! :(

**sleepy child** : youre saved this time......

**purple grape** : ily so much you saved me _@good boy!!_

**good boy!!** : gonta love you too!!

**all i want for christmas** : tenko, himiko and angie are staying at himikos house this christmas!! 

**all i want for chirstmas** : we’ll leave next thursday!!

**purple grape** : lucky you 🙄🙄

**holiday spirit** : Kokichi wants to join us??~~

**purple grape** : ew no

**holiday spirit** : Then why are you jealous??~~

**purple hrape** : the truth is....

**purple grape** : i have a crush on yumeno-chan </3

**sleepy chuld** : WHAT

**all i want for christmas** : WHAT

**holiday spirit** : Understandable!!~~

**blueberyy** : hes lying you should know this by now

**all i want for christmas** : stupid degenerate

**idk aa** : I will be leaving Sunday evening.

**idk aa** : ..Was naming me this hard?

**bot on the pot** : Ouma-kun doesn’t seem to have too much trouble?? Maybe he could name you?

**purple grape** : i dont know how to make his name chirstmas relateddd

**loveliest girl** : your name isnt even xmas related dumb bitch

**purple whore** : whore-chan

**green grape** : no worries i got this

**green grape changed idk aa to xmas karaoke champion**

**xmas karaoke champion** : I will tear out your nerves.

**green grape** : love you too <3

**christmas carol** : KARAOKE CHAMPION?!?!?!?!

**christmas carol** : I NEED TO SEE THIS

**xmas karaoke champion** : Absolutely not.

**purple grape** : might just have to fight you on that title

**xmas karaoke champion** : bitches rlly think they can beat me 🙄🥱

**xmas karaoke champion** : im too quirky to lose 🤪😘

**purple grape** : omg

**christmas carol** : wh

**loveliest girl** : HOLY FUCK

**green grape** : im so proud

**kitty** : what the fuck

**all i want for christmas is** : WHAT IN THE DEGENERATE

**sleepy child** : why

**blueberry** : youve corrupted him

**purple grape** : and?? you think i feel guilty or smth 🥱🙄💀

**someone will die of fun** : he didn’t even need to @ you for you to know he was talking bout you

**purple grape** : who else would he talk abt ;)

**twinkle twinkle little star** : im free until next week

**twinkle twinkle little star** : what abt you maki roll??

**someone will die of fun** : ok uh

**someone will die of fun** : what the fuck is christmas?

**santa cosplay** : *background music stops*

**purple grape** : *the song was work by Rihanna*

**santa cosplay** : no

**purple grape** : anywayyy dumb harumaki-chan doesn’t know xmas????

**purple groae** : what a loser lmaooo

**someone will die of fun** : dont call me that

**purole grape** : harumaki or idiot??

**green grape** : you didnt know xmas either until i told you 3 yrs ago

**purple grape** : ive been betrayed

**purole grape** : backstabebed

**green grape** : and ill gladly do it again

**purple grape** : bitch

**twinkle twinkle little star** : you sure you dont know xmas?????

**someone will die of fun** : yes

**christmas carol** : then it’s been decided!!!

**blueberry** : it has??

**chirtmas** **carol** : we’re wathing xmas movies and teaching xmas to maki!!!!

**someone will die of fun** : you dont have to do that

**purole grape** : yeah we dont

**someome will die of fun** : nevermind sounds great

**purple groae** : 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

**someone will die of fun** : oh no you sent me multiple middle finger emojis

**someone will die of fun** : im so sad whatever shall i do

**someone will die of fun** : 🖕

**someone will die of fun is offline**

**santa cosplay** : power move

**15 users are offline**

**purple grape** : ugghhhhhhjhh

**All users are offline**

**[11.59pm]**

**worse than hell**

**chritmas carol** : party friday 5pm??

**15 users reacted with :thumbs_up:**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for taking so long to post a new chapter ig 🙄🙄 (no really im sorry)
> 
> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> kitty = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion, idk aa = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl, jingle bells = Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> purple grape = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara


	31. im sorry i dont know what this is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> extra chapter (not related to the main story-ish or plot)

**rantaro** : how could you

 **kokichi** : wow ok blaming me 🙄🙄

 **rantaro** : it was your fault 😀

 **kokichi** : uhhh no 😐

 **kokichi** : not my fault the gym couldn’t deal with a few bombs 🙄🤚

 **kokichi** : they should have made it bomb proof 🤨🤨

 **rantaro** : first komaeda now you 😬😬

 **rantaro** : whos next??? togami?? 🤑🤑 

**kokichi** : dont give him ideas 😳😳😳

 **rantaro** : no please we need a gym 😭😭

 **kokichi** : no we don’t exercise isnt necesarry 🥱🥴

 **rantaro** : no wonder youre literally a stick 🤭

 **kokichi** : its the lack of care for my mental and physical health too 🤪🥰🤭

 **rantaro** : literally do you even sleep 🙄🙄😴

 **kokichi** : sleep is for the weak avocado man 🥶🖕

 **rantaro** : when did you sleep last?? 👁👄👁

 **kokichi** : wednesday

 **rantaro** : wednesdaay what??

 **kokichi** : wednesday 2015

 **rantaro** :

 **kokichi** :

 **rantaro** : fucking sleep you dumb bitch 😀😀

 **kokcihi** : no thnx 🤩😗✌️☕️

 **rantaro** : i will force you 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪

 **kokichu** : id like to see you try 😘😍🥱

 **rantaro** : youll be sorry 🙃

 **kokichi** : no i wont 🤤


	32. xmas is cool

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (spoilers v3 and minor dr2) you can skip this i just need somewhere to ramble!!
> 
> what if kokichi was tied up just like nagito?? but like in ch3,, maki got tired of kokichi and she just tied him to a chair (tying up his hands and legs and then tying his hands to a chair) in a classroom (i haven’t actually played v3 yet so i don’t know the map that well),, so like shuichi brings food to kokichi (breakfast and dinner) maki and kaito coming along so kokichi doesn’t starve,, so like during night time someone comes into the classroom to kill kokichi (i was thinking himiko),, kokichi convinces them not to kill him and just when the person is like crying and apologizing and about to untie kokichi or smth someone else (i was thinking tsumugi cause no death has happened for awhile and she needs to kill someone so the kg continues) kills the first person,, and so like kokichi has a traumatizing night of sitting next to a dead body (which fell on top of him when they were killed so he’s covered in their blood too) and he’s like panicking and stuff,, in the morning shuichi comes by with maki and kaito and boom body discovery announcement,, everyone thinks it’s kokichi even tho he was tied up and couldn’t have done it (cough ch4 flashback cough) but like tsumugi already made someone else take her place in execution and had used a flashback on someone (im thinking gonta or kiyo now) to make them think they killed the first person and they get executed and kokichi is the only one who knows the truth or then the killer if they’re not tsumugi is found out and executed
> 
> sorry for the long text enjoy the chapter now ig

**[12.37am]**

**worse than hell**

  
**christmas carol** : im so happy the chritmas party was a success!!!

 **purple grape** : ehh it was fineee

 **green grape** : kokichi is way too happy about a simple butterfly hair clip

 **purple grape** : EXCUSE YOU BITCH THIS ISNT JUST SOME BUTTERFLY HAIR CLIP IT IS A _GIFT_ FROM GONTA I WILL BREAK UR KNEECAPS IF YOU TALK SHIT ABT MY GIFT

 **blueberry** : ignore him kokichi he’s just a toxic friend

 **green grape** : this is bullying

 **good boy!!** : gonta happy kokichi like gift!!!!

 **purple grape** : i want to be buried with it

 **somebody will die of fun** : that can be arranged

 **green grape** : welp we’re leaving tomorrow _@xmas karaoke champion_

 **loveliest girl** : IT’S ALREADY SATURDAY???!??????

 **mrs claus** : And it is also very late. Go to sleep.

 **purple grape** : it’s actually rlly early

 **mrs claus** : _Sleep_.

 **christmas carol** : yes ma’am!!!

**All users are offline**

**[8.28am]**

**worse than hell**

**christmas carol** : so who’s staying at the dorms this holiday??

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : what’s the point of staying at the dorms if you have a family to got to??

 **kitty** : which is exactly why i’m staying at the dorms

 **good boy!!** : gonta staying in dorms with ryoma!!

 **someone will die of fun** : i’m staying too

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : wanna come with me instead??

 **someone will die of fun** : wanna die?

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : oh cmon it’ll be fun!!

 **someone will die of fun** : fine.....

 **purple grape** : wow meeting the grandparents already?!?!

 **purple grape** : you two are moving fast!!

 **loveliest girl** : what’s next?? pregnancy?

 **santa cosplay** : wouldn’t marriage come first??

 **santa cospaly** : or maybe harukawa gets pregnant first then they marry because of that but they’re not the ones for each other so they live miserably togetehr forever for their child!!!

 **purple grape** : good job us 🤜

 **loveliest girl** : 🤛

 **santa cosplay** : 🤛

 **loveliest girl** : lmao it looks like we’re fisting our names

 **someone will die of fun** : get ready to die

**someone will die of fun is offline**

**santa cosplay** : _AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH_

**santa cosplay is offline**

**purple grape** : cmon harumaki-chan let’s just call a truce!!!!!!

 **purple grape** : please

**purple grape is offline**

**loveliest girl** : leaving the sexiest for last i see ;)

 **loveliest girl** : wait fu

**loveliest girl is offline**

**holiday spirit** : How tragic!!~~

 **sleepy child** : santa listened to my xmas wishes :o

 **all i want for christmas** : of course she did!!! :D

 **holiday spirit** : Awww!!~~

 **sleepy child** : the emoticons,,,,,, ⭐️o⭐️

 **xmas karaoke champion** : isn’t santa claus a male??

 **all i want for christmas** : santa is a female and is married to mrs claus (they are lesbians)!! that’s what tenko’s master told tenko!!

 **all i want for christmas** : you can all have your own traditions but tenko’s is correct!!

 **xmas karaoke champion** : it is not

 **green grape** : cmoonn kiyo it’s 2020 nearly 2021 you gotta be more inclusive

 **green grape** : santa and mrs claus are a lesbian couple stop being homophobic smh

 **xmas karaoke champion** : everyday im more and more tempted to break up with you

 **green grape** : please don’t

 **christmas carol** : omg it’s nearly 2021 im not ready

 **blueberry** : i don’t think anyone is

 **purple grape** : I’M BACK!!!

 **loveliest girl** : miss me? 😘

 **christmas carol** : of course 💕💕

  
  


**[8.58am]**

**strip club**

**moody pussy** : DISSIJSISJSISJSIYJSI FUCK SHE’S PERFECT

 **pole dancer** : ew gay

 **the bartender** : you’re sitting on saihara’s lap

 **pole dancer** : your point?

**[9.02am]**

**worse than hell**

**loveliest girl** : ❤️

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : :(

 **someone will die of fun** : stop that

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : :’(

 **sleepy child** : WAIT I NEED TO COLLECT THE TEARS

 **holiday spirit** : Oh my!! Such a long message!! She must be serious!!~~

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : im not actually crying

 **all i want for chirstmas** : that can be arranged :)

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : wh

 **sleepy child** : thnx tenk

 **someone will die of fun** : what did you do

 **all i want for chirstmas** : just kicked the degenerate!! ovo

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : IN THE BALLS

 **loveliest girl** : kinky

 **santa cospaly** : no it’s not.....

 **mrs claus** : What happened?

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : chabs kicked me int he balls

 **all i want for christmas** : and tenko will do it again if you call her that :)

 **mrs claus** : Before that..

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : oh right..

 **someone will die of fun** : kaito’s grandparents don’t want me coming over for christmas

 **purple grape** : guess you aren’t getting their blessing

 **someone will die of fun** : wasn’t once enough for you?

 **purple grape** : JUST KIDDING PLSDONTKILLME

 **santa cosplay** : but why?!?!?!?!? you two are perfect for each other!!!!!!!!!

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : that’s what i said!!

 **someone will die of fun** : they want to spend time with just kaito on their own since it’s been a while since they’ve seen him

 **someone will die of fun** : i didn’t take it personally

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : i did >:(

 **sleepy child** : the emoticons are tenko’s thing

 **sleepy child** : ill kill if you dont stop

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : you don’t scare me

 **sleepy child** : ill cast a gel never works on your hair curse

 **twinkle twinkle little sta** r: I TAKE IT BACK

 **purple grape** : next is angie’s turn how will she make momo-chan cry??

 **holiday spirit** : angie will make your death look like and accident.

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : MAKI ROLL HELP

 **someone will die of fun** : no

 **purple grape** : and now all the lesbians™️ have scared the shit out of moronta-chan

 **purple grape** : thank you for watching this beauty we’ll see you next week onnn

 **purple grape** : “lesbians are terrifying” the series

 **good boy!!** : you’re welcome!!

 **blueberry** : are you going to go to your family for chirstmas kokichi?

 **purple grape** : yepp!! it’s been way too long since i’ve seen them!!

 **blueberry** : that’s too bad

 **purple grape** : aww did you want me to come with you??

 **blueberry** : kinda

 **purple grape** : maybe next chirstmas ;)

 **blueberry** : why is there a winky face

 **blueberry** : i dont want you in my home anymore

 **purple grape** : meanie >:T

 **mrs claus** : Do any of you know how to cook? _@good boy!! @someone will die of fun @kitty_

 **good boy!!** : no but gonta can learn!!

 **someone will die of fun** : never had to learn

 **kitty** : we’ll just eat take out

 **someone will die of fun** : do we have enough money for it??

 **mrs claus** : Maybe I should stay..

 **chirtsmas carol** : no way!!

 **chirtmas carol** : you should enjoy chritsmas with your family

 **chirtsmas carol** : they’ll be fine, right??

 **kitty** : sure

 **someone will die of fun** : hopefully

 **good boy!!** : yes!!!

 **blueberry** : you’re supposed to be convincing her

 **kitty** : don’t have enough energy

**[2.36pm] (sunday)**

**taro — > kiyo**

**taro** : are you all packed?

 **kiyo** : you’ve asked me this three times

 **taro** : are you?

 **kiyo** : yes

 **taro** : we can go then

 **kiyo** : you still haven’t told me where we’re going

 **taro** : it’s a surprise ;)

 **kiyo** : a surprise that makes us go to the train station with a bus then to the airport with a train and then when we land we use 5 different busses to get where we’re supposed to?

 **taro** : that’s just cause i don’t like cars

 **kiyo** : figured

 **taro** : cmon let’s go

 **kiyo** : alright i’m coming

**travel pics @notavocado**

“In Lapland with my boyfriend _@ultanthropologist_ <3”  
  


**9.6mil likes 83.7k retweets 502.1k replies [12.23am]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> kitty = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> purple grape = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara


	33. ceo of short chapters 😗✌️

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> uhh angst wooooo..... kokichi and maki friendship i guess?? kind of...??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> check end notes please!! also i’m only going to use -chan honorifics from now on,,

**[9.29pm]**

**worse than hell**

**santa cosplay** : um,,

 **someone will die of fun** : what is it

 **kitty** : didn’t you leave around 20 mins ago??

 **santa cosplay** : uh yeah but

 **santa cosplay** : i found kokichi passed out in an alley,,,

 **good boy!!** : but kokichi leave two days ago??

 **someone will die of fun** : send your location i’ll pick him up

 **someone will die of fun** : you can still catch your train if you run

 **santa cosplay** : no it’s fine i’ll bring him on my own

 **santa cosplay** : i don’t really wanna go home anyway

**santa cosplay is offline**

* * *

“What were you doing sleeping in an alley? You left to go home on _Monday_.” Harukawa mumbles angrily to herself as she pulls Ouma’s jacket off said boy. “You’re so fucking cold you can’t even move your hands.”

“Um, should Ouma go take a warm bath? I’ve never had to deal with something so plainly worrying before.” Shirogane stands close by while Hoshi sits on one of the the common room’s couches.

“No. We need to give him so dry clothes and wrap him up in some blankets.” Harukawa says as she starts to remove Ouma’s wet clothing. Shirogane immediately looks away in embarrassment.

“I-I’ll go get them!!” The bluenette quickly runs off going up the stairs of the boys’ side of the dormitory.

“Where did Gokuhara go?” Harukawa turns toward Hoshi.

“Checking the food situation.”

“I-I’m here!!” Shirogane runs back down the stairs, handing the clothes and blankets to Harukawa who starts dressing Ouma up.

“We only have instant ramen!” Gokuhara says, coming out of the dining hall.

“I’ll go grocery shopping. Hoshi, I trust you know how to take care of this situation.” Harukawa goes to the girls’ side of the dormitory.

“You heard what you’re supposed to do.” Hoshi sighs pointing his candy cigarette at the blue haired girl. Shirogane nods, starting to wrap Ouma up in blankets and then placing him beside Hoshi on the couch.

“Will this be enough?” Gokuhara asks, worry clear in his voice and face.

“I’ll make him something warm to drink.” Hoshi gets up from the couch and walks into the kitchen through the dining hall.

“There is only hot chocolate.” Gokuhara tells Hoshi before sitting down on the couch and moving Ouma onto his lap.

“Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone. Hoshi’s in charge.” Harukawa, no fully dressed to go outside into the cold, leaves the dormitory.

* * *

  
**[10.11pm]**

**worse than hell**

**someone will die of fun** : is ouma awake?

 **santa cosplay** : yeah,,

 **santa cosplay** : he’s just staring at his empty mug blankly,,,,

 **kitty** : he barely slept

 **kitty** : for 15 minutes maybe

 **someone will die of fun** : make him fall asleep

 **santa cosplay** : he won’t let anyone near him

 **santa cosplay** : we’re all on the other side of the room

 **mrs claus** : What’s going on?

 **santa cosplay** : we thought everyone had the chat muted for xmas,,,,

 **mrs claus** : I have it unmuted incase something happens. 

**mrs claus** : Care to tell me what happened?

 **someone will die of fun** : we’ll deal with this on our own enjoy your christmas

 **mrs claus** : I’m already on my way.

 **good boy!!** : you don’t need to!! :(

 **mrs claus** : I want to.

**mrs claus is offline**

**someone will die of fun** : i’m nearly home

* * *

“So..” Harukawa awkwardly started.

“So?”

“You’re homeless.” There was a flash of panic on Ouma’s face before it returned to the blank stare.

“I was kicked out of the house by my parents.” Ouma lies.

“And they didn’t feed you or let you sleep before they kicked you out? And don’t try to tell me they kicked you out a long time ago because that would still make you homeless.” Harukawa glares at Ouma, daring him to try to lie again.

“Fine. I’m homeless. Just.. don’t tell anyone, especially the principal.”

“Why especially Principal Kirigiri?”

“I’m kinda, maybe supposed to be living with my organization but they were all killed a few months ago. My talent isn’t really...” Ouma goes quiet for a few minutes. “I shouldn’t be allowed to still be here with you all.” He mumbles.

“All 10 000 of them were killed?” Ouma just stares blankly at Harukawa in response.

“I shouldn’t have told you anything..”

“I won’t tell anyone.” Harukawa promises.

“Good.”

* * *

**[12.09am]**

**worse than hell**

**santa cosplay** : so are we getting an explanation?? _@purple grape_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh so angst yeah,, pls give me angst ideas for characters,, i already kinda have a few ideas for kirumi and tsumugi and this chapter was for kokichi so uhh (also this won’ be like the only time the kokichi angst will be mentioned)
> 
> for the angst i won’t do sexual harrasment or non-con/r*pe or really anything *super* violent with parents or family since it makes me uncomfy,,, i also won’t do anything eith mental illnesses since i don’t have any and don’t wanna research a lot for a dumb chatfic
> 
> for kiyo i won’t do angst centered around his sister and if i do it won’t be inc*st
> 
> kitty = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa


	34. take this monstrosity and pretend its already xmas k thnx

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> um next chapter will be after new years (in the fanfic not in real life) so don’ be surprised when the v3 cast talk abt it already being 2021 next chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> at first i was going to make the kokichi angst be that he goes home to dice but then they’re all d3ad and he like immediately runs back to the dorms and is a sobbing mess and stuff but then i realized that i wouldn’t know how to write a recovery from something that traumatizing and kokichi would probably just like distance himself from everyone until he just disappears or something idk it would be too angsty and so i decided to make him homeless and so stubborn and stupid that he wouldn’t tell anyone he’s homeless or stay at the dorms like a normal person bcs logic

**[1.09pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**santa cospaly** : we have to make this chirtsms special!!

 **someone will die of fun** : why

 **kitty** : sounds like a bother

 **mrs claus** : If you insist.

 **purple grape** : geeezz show some enthusiasm!!!

 **purple grape** : it’s chritsmasss!!

 **good boy!!** : yay!!!

 **purple grape** : be more like gonta

 **santa cospaly** : i think making this christmas special is important!!

 **santa cosplay** : this is your first christmas, right?? _@someone will die of fun_

 **someone will die of fu** n: what of it

 **santa cospaly** : we have to make it special!!

 **good** **boy!!** : gonta agree!!

 **mrs claus** : I will take care of the decorations and food.

 **santa cosplay** : you have to enjoy chirtsmas too!

 **santa cosplay** : you’re the only one who can cook so you can do that if you want to but i can decorate with kokichi

 **purple grape** : sure i guess

 **good boy!!** : gonta will buy presents!!

 **kitty** : i’ll help

 **mrs claus** : We should buy presents for everyone else too.

 **someone will die of fun** : i guess i can help buy presents too

 **santa cosplay** : let’s call this operation “Christmas Und Newyears Together!”

 **purple grape** : und???? newyears?????

 **santa cosplay** : i had to make sacrifices to make sure it’s cunt for short

 **purple grape** : i applaud you

 **mrs claus** : Let’s just not call it anything.

 **santa cosplay** : :(

  
  


**on hiatus for xmas & new years!! _@ultcosplayer_**

“Chirstmas with some of my friends!! Still on hiatus!!”

**photo link attacked**

  
**7.2mil likes 28.9k retweets 292k replies [8.29pm]**

**[4.57am]**

**worse than hell**

**christmas carol** : guess who’s coming back before new years!!

 **santa cospaly** : you are?!

 **chirstams carol** : yep im already on the train!!

 **somone will die of fun** : why are you coming back so early

 **chirstmas carol** : aww you dont want me there??

 **someone will die of fun** : that’s not what i said

 **christmas carol** : i thought being with my friends on new years would be fun!!

 **purple grape** : so you’re escaping from ur family

 **christmas carol** : h

 **chirstmas carol** : how’d you know..

 **santa cosplay** : well well well ms. i have my shit together looks like your shit is actually apart

 **kitty** : why are we talking about shit now

 **good boy!!** : nidai talks about his shit a lot!!

 **purple gasp** : GASP

 **purple grape** : YOU TWO HAVE CORRUPTED THE PURE

 **santa cosplay** : IM SO SORRY

 **purple grape** : get on your knees and beg for forgiveness

 **christmas carol** : deja vu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> kitty = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> purple grape = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara


	35. beep beep bitches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this takes place after new years btw!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just need to be in a video call with my class for an hour and then i’m on christmas holiday whooo

**[8.29pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**loveliest girl** : FREEDOM WHOOO

 **bot on the pot** : I’m coming back to the dormitory today!

 **bluebbery** : i think most of us are

 **purple grape** : shuuumaaaaiiii i miissseeddd yoouuuuuuu

 **blueberry** : i missed you too

 **green grape** : what’s up with the messages before this??

 **green grape** : what happened to you kokichi

**purple grape deleted 2 messages**

**purple grape** : sorry did you say something taro-chan??

 **green grape** : nvm then

 **green grape** : did everyone have fun this christmas

 **sleepy child** : nyess

 **christmas carol** : spending new years with maki kokichi tojo and shirogane was maybe the best day of my life!!

 **chistmas carol** : if you don’t count the days miu’s with me <3

 **loveliest girl** : STOP BEING SO FUCKING ADORABLE

 **christmas carol** : never <3 <3

 **green grape** : i asked about christmas

 **chirstmas carol** : and i answered about new years

 **santa cosplay** : we bought you all presents!!

 **someone will die of fun** : me hoshi and gonta bought the presents don’t take all the credit

 **santa cospaly** : but we all made suggestions on what to buy!!

 **mrs claus** : They were bought with my money so the presents are from me, end of discussion.

 **purple grape** : shumai i bought you a separate present!!

 **blueberry** : i bought you something too

 **purple grape** : awww how cute

 **santa cosplay** : WE GET IT YALL HAVE LOVE NOW STFU

 **someone will die of fun** : kaito did i ever tell you that i love you

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : i love you too maki roll!!! <3

 **santa cosplay** : now you’re just doing it in purpose

 **someone will die of fun** : :)

 **loveliest girl** : OHOHOHO HOW SAVAGE TITLESS

 **someone will die of fun** : i’ll kill you before you even manage to step foot into the dormitory

 **loveliest girl** : hhhhhh i w-was just k-k-kidding,,,

 **green grape** : i will never get used to you stuttering through text

 **xmas karaoke champion** : you’re supposed to be sleeping

 **green grape** : _you’re_ supposed to be sleeping

 **xmas karaoke champion** : .....touché

**[9.51pm]**

**worse than hell**

**christmas carol** : i’m worried...

 **santa cosplay** : why?

 **christmas carol** : the hope’s peak twitter account hasn’t posted anything in awhile

 **someone will die of fun** : the account is deleted

 **kitty** : wonder why

 **chsitmas carol** : that just worries me more

**Junko Enoshima _@juwunkowoowoficcial_**

“Hey guyss!!! Guess whatt???? _@ultchildcaregiver_ Maki Harukawa is actually the Ultimate Assassin and the person behind the now deleted Hope’s Peak Exposed!”

  
**10.2mil likes 302k retweets 20.9mil replies [10.00pm]**

**|**   
**|**   
**|**   
**|**

**gremlin child _@supremeleader_**

“i feel so fucking betrayed. she takes a video of me insulting miu which gets me millions of death threats and SHE DOESN’T EVEN RECORD MY GOOD SIDE?!?! THE AUDACITY OF THIS _BITCH!!_ SHE COULDN’T EVEN TRY TO MAKE MY ASS LOOK GOOD??! what a bitch 🙄🙄”

  
**1.9mil likes 123k retweets 904k replies [10.03pm]**

**|  
|  
|  
|**

**Kaito Momota @luminaryofthestars**

“who cares if she’s an assassin?? assassin’s are hot”

**999k likes 289k retweets 10k replies [10.07pm]**

**|**   
**|**   
**|**   
**|**

**Kaede Akamatsu _@pianofreak_**

“goddamn it i was so sure it was shirogane”

**1mil likes 100k retweets 721k replies [10.13pm]**

**[10.20pm]**

**worse than hell**

**mastermind** : what the fuck guys

 **purple grape** : how do you keep coming back

 **mastermind** : YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE SHOCKED AT THE BIG REVEAL

 **sleepy child** : eh sounds like a pain

 **purple grape** : i already knew lmao

 **santa cosplay** : wait did everyone think i was behind the acc before we were told it was harukawa

 **christmas carol** : of course not you’re too sexy to do that haha

 **santa cospaly** : that won’t work on me

 **chirtsams carol** : ok yes i did

 **purple grape** : same

 **santa cospaly** : IS THAT WHY YOU WERE SO MEAN TO ME??!?!

 **purple grape** : maaayyybeeee??

 **santa cosplay** : get on your knees and beg for forgiveness

 **purple grape** : ughh

**purple grape is offline**

**kitty** : he’s actually doing it

 **blueberry** : ...send a picture

 **someone will die of fun** : blackmail material

 **purple grape** : i have more blackmail on you than you have on me

 **mastermind** : DON’T IGNORE ME YOU DUMB BITCHES

 **mrs claus** : I don’t think anyone really cares.

 **mastermind** : BUT YOU ALL GOT DEATH THREATS AND SUCH BECAUSE OF HER

 **someone will die of fun** : i told them all before the christmas holiday

 **mastermind** : wh

 **someone will die of fun** : i also told them that you threatened to tell the public im the ultimate assassin if i didn’t go along with your plan

 **someone will die of fun** : there’s nothing to threaten me with anymore so

**purppe grape added Chihiro Fujisaki**

**purple grape gave admin to 1 user**

**Chihiro Fujisaki added Alter Ego**

**Chihiro Fujisaki gave admin to 1 user**

**Alter Ego banned mastermind**

**Chihiro Fujisaki** : sorry about enoshima!!

 **Chihiro Fujisaki** : with alter ego here she shouldn’t be able to get back into the chat,,

 **christmas carol** : thank you so much!!

 **Chihiro Fujisaki** : no problem!!

 **Chihiro Fujisaki** : alter ego will have to stay in the chat so enoshima or anyone else can’t get back in on their own!

 **Chihiro Fujisaki** : don’t worry, i won’t be able to read your chats!!

 **mrs claus** : Thank you, Fujisaki. How should we pay you?

 **Chihiro Fujisaki** : the blackmail ouma gave on my class is enough!!

 **Chihiro Fujisaki** : bye everyone!

**Chihiro Fujisaki has left worse than hell**

**green grape** : wh

 **all i want for christmas** : THAT DEGENERATE

 **purple grape** : im convinced that in another life we’re brothers

 **xmas karaoke champion** : you two do look rather similar

 **purple grape** : omg long lost brother :O

 **Alter Ego** : beep beep bitches go to sleep

**Alter Ego muted 16 users for 18 hours**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> kitty = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> purple grape = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> Chihiro Fujisaki = Chihiro Fujisaki  
> Alter Ego = Chihiro’s AI, Alter Ego


	36. lick it up baby! LICK. IT. UP.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ceo of short chapters 🥳🍾 ,,,,,,,have i used this joke before???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have no idea on how musicals work ive only been in one and it was a knock off AND it was like years ago (probably 2-4)

**[8.59pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**santa cosplay** : now finally the xmas and twitter arcs are over

 **christmas carol** : i genuinely don’t understand what you’re talking about

 **santa cosplay** : what arc should we have next?!

 **santa cosplay** : angst arc?? zombie apocalypse?! KILLING GAME?!???!?!

 **xmas karaoke champion** : i’m not sure you know what an arc is

 **santa cosplay** : of course i do!!

 **santa cosplay** : we should do a musical arc!!

 **someone will die of fun** : absolutely not

 **santa cosplay** : i told about my idea to principal kirigiri and he loved it!!

 **santa cospaly** : us the 77th and the 78th will be doing the musical!!

 **santa cospaly** : of course only if you want to it’s a voluntary thing

 **christmas caro** l: sounds fun i’m in!!

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : what musical are we doing??

 **santa cosplay** : we’ll vote for one

 **santa cosplay** : heathers (a bit censored since we’re teenagers), be more chill, dear evan hansen, wicked or hamilton!!

 **christmas carl** : WICKED WICKED WICKED

 **someome will die of run** : if i have to choose then hamilton

 **purple grape** : heathers but no censor ;)

 **loveliest girl** : eyyyy

 **blueberry** : dear evan hansen i guess

 **green grape** : heathers sounds fun

 **kitty** : bmc

 **good boy!!** : gonta doesn’t know any of them :(

 **santa cosplay** : just choose the one that sounds the most fun!!

 **good boy!!** : be more chill!

 **sleepy child** : wicked!!!

 **all i want for christmas** : heathers bcs pretty ladies

 **christmas carol** : very good reasoning

 **holiday spirit** : Hmm!! Hmm!! Kami-sama wants Dear Evan Hansen!!~~

 **santa cosplay** : what do you want??

 **holiday spirit** : Angie wants whatever Kami-sama wants!!~~

 **bot on the pot** : Hamilton!!

 **mrs claus** : Dear Evan Hansen

 **xmas karaoke champion** : dear evan hansen

 **Alter Ego** : c-c-c-cmon c-c-c-cmon go go

 **santa cosplay** : and that’s all the votes!!

 **santa cosplay** : heathers wins!!

 **christmas carol** : but isn’t there a tie between deh and heathers???

 **santa cosplay** : oh that um

 **santa cosplay** : 77th all voted for heathers

 **mrs claus** : Of course they did..

 **purple grape** : WOOOOO GO 77TH

 **christmas carol** : when are the auditions??

 **santa cosplay** : the staff auditions are on the first day of school at 9.00am but the cast auditions are unknown

 **purple grape** : ew school

 **green grape** : right school’s starting in a few days isn’t it

 **mrs claus** : Which means you should all start getting used to bedtimes so you don’t fall asleep in class.

 **mrs claus** : _@purple grape @loveliest girl @blueberry @twinkle twinkle little star @kitty @someone will die of fun @xmas karaoke champion @santa cosplay @holiday spirit_

 **christmas carol** : that is a lot of people..

 **mrs claus** : You too.

 **christmas carol** : aye aye captain!!

**All users are offline**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i didn’t know how to end this lmao
> 
> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> kitty = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> purple grape = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> Alter Ego


	37. this is so cursed but i ahd fun wirring this yeessyy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> imthink im half asleep???

**[2.45am]**

**worse than hell**

  
**sleepy child** : RAINBOW DASH IS A GIRL?!?!?!

 **purple grap** e: always has been dumbass

 **sleepy child** : THIS WHOLE TIME I THOUGHT SHE WAS A BOY

 **sleepy child** : I REFUSED TO SHIP HER WITH THE OTHER GALS CUZ ✨LESBIANS✨

 **sleepy chipd** : BUT SHE COULDVE BEEN PART OF THE ✨LESBIANS✨ TOO

 **purple grape** : wait wait hear me out

 **purple grape** : aro/are rainbow dash

 **sleepy child** : holy guacamole

**[3.09am]**

**worse than hell**

**sleepy child** :: i was expecting amami to show up

 **purple grape** : honestly same

 **sleepy chipd** : BUT WAIT

 **sleepy child** : rainbow dash is blue and aro/ace

 **sleepy chipd** : yknow who else is blue and aro/ace???

 **purple grape** : holy shit

 **purple grape** : TSUMUGI THE WOOGY

 **sleepy child** : THE WOOGY HHAUAHUHSUSHUSAHUSHUA

 **purple grape** : tsummy-wummy was rainbow dash all along!!!

 **sleepy child** : and the plot thickens

 **purple grape** : what about twilight sparkle

 **sleepy child** : what abt her

 **purple grape** : she’s bi and purple and has an identity criss

 **sleepy chipd** : bich when

 **purple grape** : stfu i’m projecting

 **sleepy chipd** : k ure twiligjt

 **purple grape** : mioda from 77 is pinkie

 **sleepy chipd** : she dont look like pinkie

 **purple grape** : i coupdn’t think of anyone else for pinkie

 **sleepy child** : eh fair

 **sleepy cuild** : celeste is rarity

 **purple grape** : no no jo mo no mo mo

 **purple grape** : celeste is pricmess celsetia

 **sleepy chips** : YES

 **sleepy child** : miu is rarity

 **sleepy chipd** : and kaede is apple jacl

 **purple grape** : that makes no sense why

 **sleepy chipd** : ✨lesbian✨

 **purple grape** : fair enough

 **sleepy chipd** : whos’ fluttershy

 **purple grape** : gonta duh

 **sleepy chipd** : hhhh yess

 **sleepy chipd** : cute fluttery shy and big cute gonta just make ssneese

 **purpel grape** : it sdoes

 **purple grape** : is there anyone else

 **sleepy chipd** : uhhh idk

 **purple grape** : the white bro is shu shu

 **sleepy chipd** : ew alabama

 **purple grape** : it’s forbidden love 😳❤️

 **sleepy child** : nvm nvm rantaro the waro is jack apple

 **purple grape** : jacking apple

 **sleepy chipd** : apple jacking

 **purple grape** : apple jacking off

 **sleepy chipd** : ye thats avo my cado

 **purple grape** : what abt ✨lesbian✨?

 **sleepy child** : it can wait ig

 **sleepy child** : akamatsu is saigara’s princess

 **purple grape** : ew

 **sleepy chipd** : it just makes sense

 **sleeyp chipd** : youncan be their baby

 **purppe grape** : im twilight tho

 **sleepy chipd** : youre two

 **purple grape** : makes sense

 **purple grape** : OMG WE FORGOT SPIKE

 **sleepy chipd** : HOLY DHIT

 **sleepy child** : ryoma

 **purple grape** : no doubt about it

**ourple grape changed kitty to spikey wikey uwu**

**sleepy child** : that is fzcking hilaruo

 **purple grape** : ik ik

 **purple grape** : wh abt angsty princess luna

 **s.eepy chipd** : idk saihara fits????

 **purple grape** : me and shu are alabaming in two ways he dont need abother role smh

 **sleepy child** : wh atwhen

 **purple grape** : hes my bro and daddy

 **sleepy chipd** : omg ew

 **purple grape** : i think kirgiri whould be luna

 **sleepy child** : more alabaama???

 **purple grape** : isnt kirigirigiririrririririiriririririiirguhrigirhrihruhrirurrur jin jin straigth???

 **sleepy chipd** : idk lol

 **purple grape** : anywayyyyyyyyy ut can be alabaamaa ig

 **sleepy chipd** : whos starlight glimmer??????

 **purple geape** : angie cuz cult

 **sleepy child** : makes sense makes snse

 **sleepy chipd** : who am i tho

 **purple grape** : narrator

 **sleepy chipd** : fuck u imsad pinki

 **purple grape** : who tf

 **sleepy chopd** : starght pinkiee

 **purple grape** : wheen is she ever staright dough?????

 **sleepy child** : uhhh straght hair dumb bicth 🙄🙄🙄🙄

 **purple grape** : ohhhh straight hair pinkie righ right

 **purple grape** : what about twixie thooo

 **purple grape** : like blue magic pony

 **sleepy child** : im her too

 **purple grape** : soudns legut

 **mrs claus** : You two. Bed. Now.

 **purple hrape** : pr what lmao

 **mrs claus** : _@Alter Ego_

 **Alter Ego** : Sleep Bitch.

**Alter Ego muted 2 users for 10 hours**

**mrs claus is offline**

**[4.01am]**

**worse than hell**

**purple grape** : _@sleepy child_ dude

 **sleepy child** : *gal

 **purple,grape** : whateverr

 **purple grape** : what if rainbow dash was actually a guy and mlp was a pony harem anime

 **sleepy child** : and then the girls date each other in the end instead of rainbow

 **purple grape** : and fhen rainbow figures out he’s aro/ace

 **sleepy child** : and shes all happy and then she and the ✨lesbians✨ are all friends and happy end

 **purple grape** : no *he

 **sleepy child** : all pronouns

 **purple grape** : bug/bugself

 **sleepy child** : what about zir/zer

 **purple grpae** : rainbow/rainbowself??

 **sleepy chipd** : but bugs name is rainbow

 **purple grape** : ok bug/bugself they/them and she/her

 **sleepy child** : yeeeeee

 **purpel grape** : pinki would use all rpomounss too wouldnt she

 **seepy child:** love/loveself

 **purple,hrape** : bug/bugself & doll/dollself

 **sleepy child** : shed have the cutest pronouns

 **purpel grape** : ew dont make me love a pink pony

 **mrs claus** : How did you bribe Alter Ego?

 **purple grape** : i gave them blaickmail >3<

 **mrs claus** : I’ll send you more _@Alter Ego_

 **Alter Ego** : woooo

**Alter Ego muted 2 users for 10 hours**

**[10.32am]**

**worse than hell**

**christmas carol** : wh

 **loneliest gir** l: what the fuck

 **blueberry** : i am not committing alabama twice with kokichi

 **green grape** : i’m not applejack

 **xmas karaoke champion** : i love humanity.

 **all i want for christmas** : tenko thinks this is the most himiko has ever written

 **santa cospaly** : i’m writing a 100 chapter fic about this

 **mrs claus** : You will _not_.

 **holiday spirit** : Angie will draw art for every 3-5 chapters!!~~

 **santa cospaly** : thanks!!

 **all i want for christmas** : don’t forget himiko as the director!!!

 **blueberry** : and kokichi

**all i want for christmas: and him too or w/e**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> spieky wikey uwu = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> purple grape = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara


	38. i need to change the names soon lmao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW! mentions of uhhh fucking a corpse jokingly, mentions of bestiality,,,,, the characters are just talking about a horrifying fic i read a while back i swear the characters aren’t actually doing these things please believe me

**[7.21pm]**

**worse than hell**

**santa cosplay** : what the

 **santa cospaly** : p

 **santa cospaly** : ppony h

 **mrs claus** : Are you okay?

 **santa cospaly** : oh god o

 **santa cospaly** : i think i’m going to vomit

 **green grape** : yikes not on the carpet

 **santa cospaly** : no seriously,,

 **green grape** : i’m coming

**green grape is offline**

**christmas carol** : what was she freaking out over???

 **mrs claus** : Kokichi and Yumeno were talking about ponies in the middle of the night.

 **christmas carol** : ....

 **christmas carol** : _@loveliest girl_ come

 **loveliest girl** : i always come when i see you ;)

 **christmas carol** : hhhh i think im gonna vomit too

 **loveliest girl** : o shit im coming

**2 users are offline**

**twinkle twinkle little star** : ????

 **someone will die of fun** : they’re still traumatized over a fic they read

 **twinkle twinkle little sta** r: it can’t be that bad right

**_santa cospaly: deleted message_ **

**twinkle twinkle little star** : WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?!

 **xmas karaoke champion** : how interesting,,,

 **logeliest girl** : yikes am i right lol @

 **loveliest girl** : wait a sec

 **blueberry** : wait for what??

 **loveliest gril** : HOLY FUCK

 **all i wamt for christmas** : what??? what happened?????

 **logeliest girl** : OH MY FUCKING GOD IM WHEEEZINGNG

 **christmas carol** : youre supposed to be comforting me >:(

 **loveliest gurl** : _@spikey wikey uwu_ HOSHI HOLY FUCK

 **spikey wikey uwu** : what.

 **spkiey wikey uwu** :

 **spliey wikey uwu** : what the fuck is my name

 **sleepy child** : oh it wasn’t a dream

 **holiday spirit** : The name suits you, Ryoma!!~~

 **spikey wikey uwu** : how the fuck does it suit me

 **good boy!!** : gonta thinks it’s cute!!

 **spkiey wikey uwu** : i love the name

 **loveliest girl** : simp

 **spikey wikey uwu** : whore

 **horniest girl** : HIIIIWJEWIDWJXWIWISJJWIDJWISJ

 **spkiey wikey uwu** : _**stop**_

 **purple grape** : shes a whore what’d you expect

 **santa cospaly** : GET AWAY FROM HIM CORPSE FUCKER

 **purppe grape** : corpse what

 **loveliest grip** : C O R P S E F U C K E R

 **purple grape** : yeah no im a bottom

 **blueberry** : do you ever shut up

 **purple grape** : give me something to suck and ill be quiet ;)

 **good boy!!** : kokichi wants lollipop?

 **purple grape** : ...........yes

 **christmas carol** : hoshi

 **spikey wikey uwu** : yea?

 **christmas carol** : stay away from h*rses

 **spkiey wikey uwu** : ....ok

 **mrs claus** : Why did you cencor horse?

 **chritsmas carol** : shhhhhh

 **mrs claus** : We’re not talking out loud.

 **christmas carol** : and stay away from kokichi

 **spkies wikey uwu** : gladly

 **purppe grape** : fuck you too >:,(

 **christmas carol** : actually stay away from h*orses and kokcihi

 **christmas carol** : especially if they’re together

 **christmas carol** : and the horse just fucked you

 **spikey wikey uwu** : what the fuck

 **spikey wikey uwu** : i hate all of you

**spikey wikey is offline**

**purple grape** : i don’t even want to know what that was about

 **chrostmas carol** : please don’t fuck a corpse

 **christmas carol** : ever

 **purple grape** : oh no whatever shall i do i can’t fuck corpses anymore because that is something i definitely do

**loveliewt girl changed purple grape to copse fucker**

**corpse** **fucker** : i hate you

**[1.29am]**

**worse than hell**

**loveliest gril** : out of all of us

 **loveliewt girl** : shingucci is the most likely to fuck a corpse

 **xmas karaoke champion** : i prefer to bottom

 **loveliest girl** : so if you were a top you’d fuck a corpse??

 **xmas karaoke champion** : :)

 **loveliest grip** : what the fuck does that mean

 **xmas karaoke champion** : ;)

 **loveliest gril** : WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN?!?!??!

**xmas kraoke champion is offline**

**loveliest girl** : COME BACK U BITCH

**Kirumi Tojo _@ultimatemaid_**

“Why do my classmates think oversharing about their sex life is necessary?”

  
**299.9k likes 209.1k retweets 902.9k replies [1.45am]**

**|  
|  
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**gremlin child _@supremeleader_**

“you’re just jealous you don’t get to have rough kinky sex like me and shumai ;)”

  
**2.8mil likes 823.2k retweets 320.2k replies [1.46am]**

**|  
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**Shuichi Saihara _@ultdetective_**

“kokichi please just stfu”

  
**1.9mil likes 900k retweets 99.9k replies [1.50am]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> spikey wikey uwu = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> corpse fucker = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara


	39. there are so many emojis in this chapter skkssksks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i just realized i almost never write chapter summaries and if i do it’s never a chapter summary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw?? charatcer hate (kinda) idk junko’s a bitch, slut shaming too, (V3 SPOILERS!!!!) kaede’s execution/death mention kinda??
> 
> ok so like i already wrote an entire chapter before this and then remembered the musical thing and was like oops,, so uhh that chapter is going to stay unpublished until im done with the musical ig haha

**[10.45am]**

**worse than hell**

**santa cosplay** : IM GOING TO BE THE COSTUME DESIGNER AND DIRECTOR AND ILL BE CHOOSING EVERYONE’S ROLES AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 **christmas carol** : that’s great but we’re in class tsumugi!!

 **santa cosplay** : oh sorry im coming!!!!

**[1.54pm]**

**worse than hell**

**loveliest girl** : uhh

 **mrs claus** : What did you do?

 **loveliest girl** : so like _@someone will die of fun @blueberry @mrs claus @green grape_ we’re kinda part of cock itchy’s organization.......

 **someone will die of fun** : no

 **blueberry** : how

 **mrs claus** : If that is what you require..

 **green grape** : why

 **purple grape** : wellllllll im kinda getting expelled butt if you join my super cool organization i wont get expelled!!!

 **santa cospaly** : that’s nice let’s talk about the musical now

 **purple grape** : heyyy dont steal my spotlight!!!! >:T

 **santa cosplay** : YOU’RE stealing MY spotlight!!!!

 **christmas carol** : tsumugi can start and then kokichi

 **purple grape** : fiineeeee

 **santa cosplay** : the auditions will be today!!

 **green grape** : is anyone going to audition??

 **christmas carol** : me!! i’m going to try to get veronica!!

 **green grape** : i kinda wanna get jd

 **loveliest girl** : fuck that im getting jd and fucking my gf in the middle of the stage

 **mrs claus** : Please tell me that song is going to get removed. _@santa cospaly_

 **santa cospaly** : not sure yet :)

 **mrs claus** : Shirogane.

 **santa cosppoay** : :D

 **santa cosplay** : ;D

 **purple grape** : im trying for jd too none of you have a chance >:)

 **someone will die of fun** : don’t be too cocky

 **green grape** : gotta admit he is talented

 **purppe grape** : yes keep stroking my ego and cock

 **green grape** : nvm stay away from the play

 **santa cosplay** : im afraid that isnt possible...

 **blueberry** : ??

 **samta cosplay** : hes going to be one of the heathers!!

 **purple grape** : im what

 **blueberry** : hes what

 **santa cosplay** : 77 and 78 already agreed that their troublemakers and our troublemaker should be the heathers!!

 **all i want gor christmas** : but he’s a MALE

 **santa cosplay** : he’s actually going to be heather m

 **christmas carol** : wouldnt heather chandler be more like him???

 **santa cosplay** : yeah but togami is going to be chandler

 **green grape** : what about duke

 **santa cosplay** : that would leave komaeda as heather m but singing “kill urself” over and over again to him probably wouldnt be too good for his mental health even if its just acting

 **purple grape** : and you think it would be good for _my_ mental health?? >:(

 **santa cosplay** : its the only option!!

 **purple grape** : uggghhhh fineeeeeeee

 **christmas carol** : and then kokichi’s thing!!

  
  


**[2.39pm]**

**Kokichi Ouma created a group chat**

**Kokichi Ouma added Shuichi Saihara, Miu Iruma and 3 more users**

**Kokichi Ouma** : hello underlings!

**Maki Harukawa left Untitled chat**

**Kokichi Ouma added Maki Harukawa**

**Kokichi Ouma** : no escaping >:(

 **Miu Iruma** : wtf is this

 **Kokichi Ouma** : since ur dumbass decided that youre going to force some of our classmates to join my organization im making a chat for us

 **Miu Iruma** : yeah well you wouldve gotten expelled otherwise so whatever

 **Shuichi Saihara** : what is this

 **Kokichi Ouma** : anyway yall are going to have to go through a studpid test thing and some training after the musical

 **Kokichi Ouma** : if you fail im kickign you out of my organization

 **Rantaro Amami** : yall

 **Kokichi Ouma** : stfu

 **Kirumi Tojo** : the musical could take months to prepare for

 **Kokichi Ouma** : and?? idc

 **Kokichi Ouma** : no rush to do goverment things

 **Maki Harukawa** : goverment?

 **Kokichi Ouma** : oh yh i work for the goverment/president or whatever

 **Miu Iruma** : YOU WHAT

 **Kokichi Ouma** : anywayy goodnight minions

**Kokichi Ouma is offline**

**Miu Iruma** : COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT

**[6.29pm]**

**tsummy — > tarowo**

**tsummy** : audition go!!!

 **tarowo** : what

 **tsummy** : the auditions are through text because i said so and im the director!!

 **tarowo** : right

 **tarowo** : how does this work

 **tsummy** : send me a video of you singing!!

 **tsummy** : that way ill know if you can sing

 **tsummy** : and then the acting part can come like later or something

 **tarowo** : you havent thought this out at all

 **tsummy** : ill send you a script and you can act out all the parts since you like acting so much

 **tarowo** : just one page is enough

 **tsummy** : ........

 **tsummy** : ughh

 **tsummy** : who are you auditioning for

 **tarowo** : jd

 **tsummy** : ok!!

**tsummy sent a photo**

**tsummy** : here an emotional convo between jd and veronica

 **tsummy** : send the acting and singing separately k???

 **tarowo** : k

**tarowo sent 2 videos**

**tsummy** : alright 1 down 14 to go!!

 **tarowo** : maybe you should ask who’s even auditioning in the group chat

 **tsummy** : oh right

 **tsummy** : thnx amami!!

 **tarowo** : np

**[2.59pm]**

**rock <3 —> flea waltz**

**rock <3**: so uhh

 **rock <3**: who r u auditioning for??

 **flea waltz** : veronica or martha!!

 **rock <3**: ok

**rock <3 sent a photo**

**rock <3**: send the acting and singing separately k???

 **flea waltz** : sure!!

**flea waltz sent 2 videos**

**[time unknown]**

**unknown chat**

**author** : no energy to make the rest of the convos sorry!!

 **author** : the one’s who auditioned were......

 **author** : drumroll pls!

 **mastermind** : DRUM DRUM DRUM DRUM

 **author** : why thank you junko

 **mastermind** : no problemo ;)

 **author** : class 78 (trigger happy havoc): Leon Kuwata, Junko Enoshima, Aoi Asahina, Genocide Syo, Makoto Naegi, Byakuya Togami

 **author** : class 77 (goodbye despair): Mahiru Koizumi, Hiyoko Saionji, Ibuki Mioda, Nagito Komaeda, Sonia Nevermind, Akane Owari, Kazuichi Souda

 **author** : class 79 (v3): Rantaro Amami, Kaede Akamatsu, Angie Yonaga, Tenko Chabashira, Korekiyo Shinguji, Miu Iruma, Gonta Gokuhara, Kokichi Ouma, Kaito Momota, K1-B0 (Kiibo)

 **author** : and now why their auditioning and who they’re auditioning for in order by junko!!!

 **mastermind** : ok ok ok let’s goo

 **mastermind** : “dunno why it just sounds like fun and it could be good for my music career y’know???? guess id wanna be ram or kurt??” - Leon Cumwata 😏🥵

 **mastermind** : “I mean, like.. Acting is soooo meeee, yknow??!?! I think I’d be the perfect Heather Chandler or JD!” - The Fabulous Junko Fucking Enoshima ~3o 🥺🐶

 **mastermind** : “sounds like fun! I guess veronica would be fun to be but I’d prefer a background character honestly!!” - big boobie swimmer 😳😳

 **mastermind** : “KYAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!! I, the one and only _GENOCIDE SYO_ should be JD! I’m the only one who fits the role!! Gimme the fuckin’ role, balloon chest!! Or maybe I’ll snip snip your wigs...! KYHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!” - dumbass serial killer 🙄🙄 😳🔪

 **mastermind** : “uhhh, huh??? what auditon??? what is this?? enoshima told me I could get free ice cream for life if I talked to you...” - harem protag 😍😍🍀

 **mastermind** : “I don’t want to participate in your peasant activity. I’m not going to be Heather Chandelier or whatever her name is.” then like later ig “.............Are you blackmailing me?” - richie rich 🤑🥵🖕

 **mastermind** : “well, being in a musical would be fun.. i dont really mind any role but martha would be nice?? :)” - red haired lesbian or smth (the older one)

 **mastermind** : “id be the perfect heather c or d!! no other role!! >:(” - dumb blonde skank go cry to your mommy little bitch 😊🖕

 **mastermind** : “ibuki wants to be a part of a musicaaaalll!!! this would be my 10th musical!!!!! i don’t care about my role!!!!” - guess who that is brainless bitch 🙄🙄

 **mastermind** : “i’ll be one of the heathers if it really brings you hope though having someone as disgusting and horrible as me on stage would surely ruin the entire performance! ah, my luck would end up with a few dead bodies too! maybe i should jump off a roof to make sure nothing bad happens to anyone else?? don’t worry about me though!!” - my #1 fan 🤪🍾😍😍

 **mastermind** : “I’ve never been part of a play or musical before! I think it would be a very fun experience! Acting as Martha would be preferable!” - princess useless 🥱😴🤢🤮

 **mastermind** : “ill do this if i get free food” - food whore 🥞🧇🥓🥩🍗🍖🌭🍔🍟🍕🥪🧆🌮🌯🫔🥘🍝🍜🍲🍛🍣🍱🥟🦪🍤🍙🍚🍘🥮🍢🍡🍧🍨🍦🥧🧁🍰🎂🍮🍭🍬🍫🍿🍩🍪

 **mastermind** : “miss sonia is auditioning so ill audition too!! i wanna be jd with sonia as veronica! please tell me dead girl walking wont be removed 🥵🥵” - simp 👎

 **mastermind** : “sounds like fun. i wanna be jd but ram or kurt are fine too.” - avocado 🥑🥵

 **mastermind** : “i’ve always wanted to be part of a play!! veronica would be fun!! :D” - hanging around 🤭🤪😎

 **mastermind** : “Kami-sama wants Angie to be part of this musical!! Any character is fine with Angie and Kami-sama!!~~” - cult leader 😱😱😈

 **mastermind** : “tenko wants to be in the musical with angie! any character is fine as long as tenko or angie arent veronica unless dead girl walking is removed!!” - sexist 🤭😳

 **mastermind** : “being part of a musical,, keheehehhehe,,, id love to admire it from afar but Rantaro has convinced me to audition,, JD is a good role in my opinion,,” - creep 🙄🙄

 **mastermind** : “i’ll be jd and kaede will be veronica ;) ;) ;) dead girl walking better stay in the musical sag tits!!!” - skank, slut, whore 🥰

 **mastermind** : “gonta want to have fun with friends! :D” - giant dick he can fuck me anytime 😍🥵

 **mastermind** : “ugghhhhh fineeeeeee ill be heather m >:T” - my bff 🥰😍😍😘😘😘🥳😏😳

 **mastermind** : “being in a musical even if it’s without my sidekicks in it sounds like the job for the luminary of the stars!! ram or kurt would be cool ig” - homophobic gay ❤️🏳️‍🌈

 **mastermind** : “Being in a musical would be an amazing and human experience! I’ve researched all about musicals and I think I know a lot now! I’d like to be Martha!” - beep boop bitch 🤖🦾🦿

 **author** : you can say in the comments who you’d like out of the auditioned to be!!

 **author** : kokichi, byakuya and nagito will be the heathers tho :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> spikey wikey uwu = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> corpse fucker = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> tarowo = Rantaro Amami  
> tsummy = Tsumugi Shirogane
> 
> flea waltz = Kaede Akamatsu  
> rock <3 = Tsumugi Shirogane
> 
> mastermind = JUNK0 FUCK1N6 3N081M4  
> author: 01101101011110010010000001110100011010010110101101110100011011110110101100100000011010010111001100100000010000000110101101100001011001010110010001100101011101000110100001100101011101010110110001110100011010010110110101100001011101000110010101110011011010010110110101110000


	40. i forgot to change kokichi’s name from purple grape to corpse fucker last chapter whoops

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hi hiii!! this chapter has intense 4th wall breaking (it doesnt get fixed this chapter) “the author/author-chan” is a character and not actually how i act/think/react etc,, please dont think im some evil god deleting characters cuz im bored thnx

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i started writing this on the 6th,,, anywayyyyyy,, ramble time yallllll,,,,, (spoilers for all the games) this willbe long!!
> 
> surviving danganronpa would be so easy,, not like killing games in general but the killing games we played,, first of all in the first game 1st chapter youd survive bcs sayaka targeted leon and if she targeted you you could just not be horny and not leave your room,, chaoter 2 you have no relation to what’s going on with chihiro and mondo so you wouldn’t be affected unless you walked in on the deed happening,, ch 3 im a bit unsure but as long as youre not attached to alter ego/an easy target//vulnerable/easy to manipulate like taka and hifumi youll be fine,, ch 4 is sakura’s sacrifice do you wont die and in ch 5 as long as you stay out of junkos way and dont cause her trouble she wont target you and frame you for murder like with kyoko and makoto,, ch 6 junko is the only one who dies
> 
> second game ch 1 nagito wont have time to grab the knife and stab anyone even if you were beside him and as long as you dont hide under the table youll be fine,, ch 2 has no relation to you unless youre mahiru, peko or fuyuhiko,, ch 3 is actually hard,, if you have the despair disease theres a chance mikan would try to kill you but i think she chose ibuki because she could just tell ibuki to be quiet and follow her while akane would sob loudly and nagito was too weak for anything,, if you had a dispear disease that made you easy to kill shed probs kill you,, as long as you dont walk into the titty typhoon while shes murdering ibuki you wont be the hiyoko of the case,, ch 4 im unsure of,, i think gundham tried to kill mechamaru cuz it would be easier since he can just out nekomaru in sleep mode and becuase killing a robot seems less evil that killing a human ot animal,,, ch 5 youll be fine as long as youre not the traitor or naguto
> 
> v3 is the easiest probs,, ch 1 dont be near the library and youll be fine,, ch 2 dont go around talking abt how you wanna die and then let a hot goth tiddy gf kill you youll be fine,, ch 3 is either easy pr hard to survive,, completely depends on your personality(??) and gender,, if you're a guy congrats youve survived,, if youre a girl you better hope you’re enough like miu or maki so that kiyo will tink you aren’t good enough for his sister or there's a chance he’ll try to kill you, but if tenko likes you then she’ll most likely die in your place whoops,, ch 4 will be easy just don’t go on the roof or plan to kill kokichi in a virtual world,, ch 5 is easy too since you just have to stay away from the hangar and then ch 6 you’ll survive as long as you’re not the mastermind or traitor
> 
> you have no chance surviving ultra despair girls tho so good luck with that lmao (just dont be a parent and youll probs survive longer)

**[7.54pm]**

**worse than hell**

  
**santa cosplay** : now that the musical arc has officially started it will most likely last a maximum of 10 chapters and be barely talked about because author-chan is a dumb bitch!!

 **sleepy child** : dont talk abt author-chan like that!!

 **sleepy child** : shes the reason we exist yknow!!!

 **santa cosplay** : you know author-chan too???

 **sleepy child** : ofc i do!! i travel between alternative universes and have tea parties with gods,,

 **sleep child** : knowing author-chan is such a small thing

 **santa cospaly** : it’s amazing to know someone like me!!

 **christmas carol** : .....right

 **corpse fucker** : yknow what time it is???

 **blueberry** : sigh

 **blueberry** : fourth wall breaking time...

 **santa cosplay** : but you two can’t break the fourht wall

 **santa cosplay** : only the chosen ones can!!

 **corpse fucker** : ok mary sue

 **corpse fucker** : and how do _you_ know i cant break the fourth wall plain jane??

 **santa cosplay** : we’ll just ask author-chan!!!

 **love liest girl**: who tf is author-chan

 **Alter Ego** : _**[ERROR! SYSTEM CORRUPTED]**_

 **loveliest** : tf?!?!?

 **mrs claus** : I thought Alter Ego was supposed to be unhackable?

 **xmas karaoke champion** : finally, my summonings have been answered,,,,

 **blueberry** : ....what did you do?

 **xmas karaoke champion** : summon a god

 **loveliest girl** : WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NOT STOP YOUR BF FROM SUMMONING GODS THAT CAN DESTROY US WITH THE BLINK OF AN EYE YOU FUCK FACE VIRGIN?!?!?!?! _@green grape_

 **green grape** : he’s cute when he summons gods

 **corpse fucker** : breaking news a god has been summoned that is destroying our world because the bf of a twink is a total simp

 **green grape** : at least im simping respectfully mr wont stop looking at saihara’s flat ass

 **corpse fucker** : as if your boyfrined has a bigger ass

 **xmas karaoke champion** : no but rantaro definitely has a great one

 **green grape** : ;)

 **mrs claus** : I absolutely despise every single one of you.

 **blueberry** : are we going to ignore the god that shinguji apparently summoned??

 **santa cosplay** : she’s here!!

 **sleepy child** : nyeeehhhh

 **all i want for christmas** : what’s going on himiko?!?!

 **Alter Ego** : hi it’s author-chan 😌

 **corpse fucker** : ew

 **holiday spirit** : Kami-sama says hello!! Though you’re here early for evening tea!!~~

 **Alter Ego** : uhh yea

 **Alter Ego** : im not supposed to be here

 **xmas karaoke champion** : apologies author-san but i summoned you here

 **Alter Ego** : k

 **xmas karaoke champion** : ive read that you can grant a wish

 **Alter Ego** : as long as it isn’t a bigger ass or like illegal

 **loveliest girl** : what about bigger tits??

 **loveliest girl** : asking for a friend

 **christmas carol** : you already have big honka-donkers tho

 **loveliest girl** : when i said asking for a friend i meant it dumbass

 **loveliest girl** : _@someone will die of fun @sleepy child_ this is your chance

 **someone will die of fun** : you will perish at sundown

 **Alter Ego** : i could give them bigger honka-donka-wowzers but i can only grant a wish to whoever summoned me

 **Alter Ego** : sorry flatties :(

 **someone will die of fun** : i will be the first human to kill a god

 **someone will die of fun** : consider this a threat and warning

 **Alter Ego** : yes please step on me

 **someone will die of fun** : why is everyone so fucking horny

 **twinkle twinke little star** : im not i just wanna cuddle :(

 **someone will die of fun** : fine im coming

 **someone will die of fun** : take your pants off

**someone will die of fun is offline**

**twinkle twinkle little star** : wait what

**twinkle twinkle little star is offline**

**xmas karaoke champion** : finally the distractions are gone

 **xmas karaoke champion** : do i get my wish

 **Alter Ego** : sure dude

 **xmas karaoke champion** : i wish to have a detailed kink list from everyone in hope’s peak academy

 **Alter Ego** : teachers, principal and staff too??

 **xmas karaoke champion** : especially them

 **Alter Ego** : ok im done

 **santa cosplay** : oh no

 **xmas karaoke champio** n: never thought you’d be into tenticals shirogane

**santa cosplay banned ‘tenticals’**

**xmas karaoke champion** : i will find other ways

 **santa cospaly** : please dont

 **spikey wikey uwu** : how did this get from musicals to a god hacking alter ego

 **Alter Ego** : yeah im supposed to to erase your memory about this

 **mrs claus** : But you’re not. Why is that?

 **Alter Ego** : too much work lmao

 **Alter Ego** : this chapter has been delayed too much

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : oh god–

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : wait what are your pronouns

 **Alter Ego** : she/her probably

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : oh god shes talking about chapters too

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : shes as crazy as shirogane!!!

 **someone will die of fun** : she calls herself a god of course shes insane

 **spikey wikey uwu** : oh fun we’re asking “gods” their pronouns now

 **sleepy child** : uhh duh

 **santa cosplay** : it would be pretty rude not to yknow

 **corpse fucker** : especially when she could just poof us!!

 **corpse fucker** : probably

 **corpse fucker** : can you poof us @dumb bitch god

 **blueberry** : dont aggravate the god

 **Alter Ego** : just call me author

 **Alter Ego** : but yea i can poof you

 **Alter Ego** : watch!!

**character file gontagokuharachatfic1.ch deleted**

**all i want for christmas** : what did you do?!?!?!?

**character file gontagokuharakillingharmony1.ch downloaded**

**open file?**

**yes no**

**gonta killing harmony** : huhhhb?l?

 **gonta killing harmony** : whaytz thiss?

 **gonta killing harmony** : wwwghhy monopAfd huhaave cghaat??

 **Alter Ego** : _translating please wait...._

 **Alter Ego** : “Huh? What(’s) this? Why (does the) Monopad have (a) chat?”

 **green grape** : pretty sure his grammar isnt that bad usually

 **gonta killing harmony** : whho e youj?

 **Alter Ego** : _translating please wait....._

 **Alter Ego** : “Who are you?”

 **green grape** : rantaro

 **green grape** : you should know that

 **gonta killing harmony** : rantaqook?? Opnmttga thuoughht yioouudead!!,

 **loveliest girl** : ok what the fuck is he saying

 **Alter Ego** : his big thumbs get in the way of typing properly

 **Alter Ego** : chatfic!gonta was in a chatfic so his writing had to be clear but killing harmony!gonta isn’t made to be in a chatfic so his thumbs get in the way now

 **Alter Ego** : oh right translation lol

 **Alter Ego** : “Rantaro? Gonta thought you (were) dead!!!”

 **green grape** : wait dead?????

 **santa cosplay** : killing harmony???

 **Alter Ego** : yup

 **santa cospaly** : get rid of him

 **santa cospaly** : _now_

 **Alter Wgo** : yikes ok

**character file gontagokuharakillingharmony1.ch deleted**

**character file gontagokuharachatfic1.ch restored**

**open file?**

**yes no**

**Alter Ego** : there you go

 **spikey wikey uwu** : where are you??? _@good boy!!_

 **good boy!!** : gonta’s dorm

**spikey wikey uwu is offline**

**mrs claus** : Are you alright? How are you feeling?

 **good boy!!** : fine!

 **good boy!!** : gonta feels little weird though

 **xmas karaoke champion** : how so?

 **good boy!!** : gonta feels like he disappeared for long time and came back??

 **good boy!!** : gonta not know how to explain

 **christmas carol** : im so glad youre ok

 **sleepy child** : too much too much

 **holiday spirit** : Uh ohh!! You went way too far!! Hurting Angie’s friends puts you on Kami-sama’s bad list!!~~

 **Alter Ego** : oh no whatever shall i do

 **holiday spirit** : Angie will summon Kami-sama so He can banish you from our universe.

 **green grape** : you know she’s serious when she doesn’t !!~~

 **xmas karaoke champion** : the kink list was perfect but youve gone too far

 **xmas karaoke champion** : i will aid in banishing this pest

 **santa cosplay** : if youll allow someone as plain as me to join id be delighted!

 **spikey wikey uwu** : i have no interest in occult or whatever but ill join out of pettiness

 **Alter Ego** : B̷̞̳̓̽͛a̵̙̖̠̘̍n̶̜̋̔̓͘ĩ̵͇͒͗s̶̟̩̖͐͒ḩ̵͇̅̈́̽ ̵͍̂̂̑̕m̵̺͈̲̻͐ĕ̸͔͉̪̏̀ͅ?̶̢̤͉̞̑͠͝ ̶͉̏͜ͅY̶̛͕͉̒̅̿ơ̴̰͐u̸̟̙̔͂͐ͅ ̵̢̦͈̯̏r̵̯͛e̷̱͚͐̅̆â̴̻̣̙̺̆l̶̪̘̱̤̈l̷̠͋ý̵̱̐̎ ̶̰̬̹̥̎̚ť̴͇͈̇̅͘h̴̺͍̻͊̈ĩ̴̩̟̲̚͠n̸͖̎̅͋̕k̷̬̍̐̂̈́ ̷͍̥̱͖͆̋̉y̶̙̔͒̈́͘o̶̡̯͒u̴͕̱̖̣͋ ̷̩̅̈l̴̻̲̹̊̓̀o̸͖̐̆w̵̝̠̽͌͊l̷̮͔͗̓̐y̷̧̓̔̚ ̵̫̤̫̏͐h̸͙͗̀̄̊ų̵̜̹͖̅̓m̸̤̼͒̅͐ȁ̶͔̤̒͠n̷͈͙̳̽ŝ̴̨͍̜̹͂́ ̶̳̳͋c̷̞͈͈̪͋o̵̧̤̎̑ǘ̷̡̬̈l̴͇̪͖̭͂d̶̞͂͆ ̸̖̠̈́d̵͎̖̐̃̿͠o̸̗̠̓ ̵̩͇̇̎͋͝t̸͉̮͕̀̔̓h̵̠̭̍̂̊̾a̸̦̮̲͆̐̽̉ͅt̴̢͖̱̓͠?̸̥͗̎͠͝

 **Alter Ego** : I̸̛̜̮̣̖̘͒̔̈́͑͊̓̓̉́̔̍̐̏͝’̵̻̣̯͍̬̺͉̘̰̞̦͙̤͈̞̥̺̜̱̄̓̌͛̌̐̀̊͌́̌́̾͒L̴̡̗̫̣̼̅̇̈́͋̎̍̂̒̌̈́͗̚͘͠ͅL̵̦͎̱̝̭͕̪͚̤̙͔̬̦̚͜ ̴̰̩̦̯̈̐̐̋̇̽̀̆̎̈́͗̄̓́̈́͆̕͝͠Ḟ̵̢̢̲̮͖̻͖̮͎̖̫̻̻̼͇̤̯Ų̶̫̣̤͙͈̖̗̼̦͓͕͐̆͜C̷̢̧̪̰̰̠̍̈́̊͆̉̒́͐̂͌̇̒̀̑̄̌̕̕ͅĶ̷̝͍̖̳̬̻̅̈́̋̓̈́I̶̡̪̬͍̭̥͍̒͜͠N̸̡̨̩͎͉̗̟͈̖̣̩̿̊̀Ģ̷̢̡̺̟̟̣̩̼̝͎̱̥̌͂̒̇̐̈͋̽̀̕͝ ̵̝́̆͘Ḍ̶̨̨̢̛̠͈͚̣̯͔͉̯͇̯͇͑̾͂̀̇̋̔̏̚͠͝͠ͅË̷͔͖̻̥͚̺̠͎̣̮̫̟̠̗͎̜́̈́̊͑̾Ş̵̨̧̩̘͈͉̬͚͕̜̳̜̖͔͙͂͒͛̎́̀̊́̉͜͠͝T̵̡̼̝͇̼́̊̀Ṙ̶̡̥̭͎̜̥̺̠͖̼͉̥̝̮͖̻̓̿ͅO̴̢̧̩̺̖̙̭̰̲̦̘̟̣͍͉̠̬͑͊Y̶̡̡͕̖͔͖͇̟̟͙̙̦͗́̈́̿̇̽̉͋͑͜͜ ̵̨̜̤̳͈̤͔̙̭̞̤̮̓̉̈́͜͝Y̸͍̳͉̽͛̆̓̍̽̄̎̀͑̕͜Ơ̸͓̭̻̺̪̫͗͊͒̋͌̿̽̇͆͐͠͝U̷̟̘̹̩̟̭̰͉̤̠͈̮͆̇̈́͗̀̏̈́̿͋̏͊͜!̵̢̡̬̮̣̩͙̻̥̙̲͒̃̍́͜ ̵̨̢̛̣̞͕̘̙̬͈͉̤̬̻̏̕A̴̡̤͖̩̘̩̰̼̗̰͍͙̣̱͓̼̗̥͑͆̿̓͒̀̏͐͛̐̕̚͝͝Ṇ̸̛̰͚̙̐̅̆̾͌́͐̉͒̏Ḍ̵͙̞̤̱̯̘͓̾́̉̿̔̕͘̕͝͝ ̶̪̺͇͙͖͈̳͉̬̘̩̪̺̹̺̙̀̑̈́̃̈͜Ḯ̵̧̨̡̳͖̗͇̤̜͍̰̗̲̱̣̬͙̑͐́͂̅͐́̇̇̾̂͌̕͠͝’̴̩̮̇̂̋̈̍̊̓̎͌͌͑́͘͘͘L̵̨̧̡̦̜̪̠̠̤̼̮̥̼̥̟̆̔̀͌̀̇̂̈̊͜L̷̡̹̫͈͑͒̃ ̶̛͓̲̟̳̟̮̼͇͇̠͎̱̺͇͈̮̫̺̌̈̋̃͐͊̋̚͠E̴̡̘̫͕̪͍̫̞̤͚̬͈͊ͅͅͅṆ̶͎̖̩̙͇͙͇̱͖̘̮̹̜̊͠ͅJ̵̢̦̙͕̠̤͉̪͉̜͍͂̂͋̿͌͛̃O̶̢̘͂̒͊̽̑̊͒̈́̽͛̃̌ͅY̶̢̧͚̻̻͙̺̬̯̥̳͖̣̬̥͖͎̑̑̐̈́͂̓̈́ͅ ̸̛̳̝̺̼̋̀͗̾̒̀̾̈́̈͂̂̔͌̋͘͠E̸̢̟̲͚̓͂ͅV̶̢̻̻̪̍̔E̷̢̧̛̙̲̫̲͇̩̤̖̖̫͎̪͔̐R̸̨̢̘̙͍̣̬͈͔͖͚̼̣̙̦̰͙̎͋̋̽͐̾Y̷̬͚͇̹̥͚̫̳͓̫̓͂͘ ̴̢̛̟̱̳̙̹̩̹̒͆̃͗͊̅́̓̿̆̊̿́͑̀̚͜͜͝L̵̹͔̜̲̞̀̓́͒̒̏̀̾̐̔̌̀͘͝͝Ả̶̡̼̠̻̦̱̦͚̮̥͍̥̠͎̪̆́̂̽͗̊̑̄̈̿͜͜͝S̷̝͈͖͙̜͉͈̱͓̖̑͋̑̍̾̿̇̾͂̔́̇͆̕͠͝͝ͅT̴̨̧̨̝̜̥̦͉͖̼̹̰̠̯̝̰͚̦̻̐̀͘ ̷̡͙̰̘̼͈͕̘̙͆̓̈́́̽͒̓͊̍͗́̂̃̑͛̓ͅS̴̡̡̢̛̙͎͓̪̞̻̹͍̀̊̑͘̚É̴̹̳̪̪̉͌̈̈́͊̇̂̍́͑͘͠͠C̷̢̬̜̣̙͉̖̝͈̖̳̝͗̄͂͑͊̍̄̑Ő̸̢̧̼͒͆̀͋̍̐̈́̋̓̏̎͊̎͆̕̕͝͝N̴̡͎̠͚̜̙̥̜̙̦̠̽͊͗̀̈̉̓̅͜͝͝D̴̯͑̆́͑̈́̾͛͋̒͝ ̸̡̢̡̨̢͔̲̬̙̜̬̞̹̹̘͖͔͂̑̔͛́̊̎̄̀͜͜͠O̷̢̝͉̐̑̌F̷̡̠͖̻̜̱̠̒̔͗͂̔̓͋̉̓̽̒̎̓̚͜͠͝ ̸̧̜̤̯̬̱̫̜̅̐̅̀̇͆̊̓̐̈̃̊̊̈̚Ḯ̶̧͖͇͓̍̀̌ͅT̷̡̛̪̭̩̣͎͎̥̱͚̠̣͕͈̦̻̐̍̏̅́̆̂̾́!̵̡̻̘̝͎̜̏̈͊̾̐̽̓̈͐̽̐̾͆͗̏̄̋̚͠

  
  


**santa cospaly** : oh no!! its evil!!

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : so we’re using it/its pronouns now?? didn’t she say she uses she/her??

 **santa cospaly** : but its crazy!!

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : still gotta respect pronouns dude

 **santa cospaly** : right sorry,,

 **???2?2?299 >>£{{£{£<$]8299**: **Y̵̡̡͕̦̜̜͔̎͌̓̑͘Ŏ̵͔͉͙̙̿̋̔̀͂̈́̍́͘͠Ų̶̖̲͕͖̰̯̫͒̓̑̍͌̓̕̕͝͝ͅ ̸̨̤͍͓̯͇̰͔̮̯̃̽̔̌̊̐́Ṭ̴̖̭̘̌́̽̔̇͐͊̈́̏͆͑̕͠H̸̡̧̺̣͕̮̺͈̉Ĭ̸̬͚͉N̸̨̛̗̞͍̬̗̋́͌̂̓͐̋͗͑͝Ķ̵̈́̈͐̏́ ̷͍͔̙̖̝͙̰̺̣̱̬̖̮͂͑̍̄̐̃̽̍͒̈́͗͜Y̴͓̭̦͈͉̩̠̗̙̳̦̿̑͝O̸̪̤̻̻͇̖̞̊̋́̓̒͑̈̆͂͒͋͝U̴̡̧̫̘͈̪̞̮̙̞͉͊̏͐̐͐̓̆̂̚͝ ̵͚̠̉̿͝C̸̥̒͛̓̾̊̇̒Å̵̧̛̝̲͕̭̮͔̬̱̭̮̇͐̈̂̐̈́̂̚͝ͅN̶̛̪̫̥̮͒̄͂̒ ̴̨̟̱̣̓̾́̐͒̔͐̎̈́̈̐̑̀͒͜I̸̧̧͈͚̯̤̠͐͑͋̉Ĝ̸̥̹̻̣̺͌̏͌̓̔́̀̒͂̔͘N̴͉̬̫̽͌̓̅Ŏ̷̗͔̝͙̺̜̗̭̞͛̎̑̀͊̀̾̉͂̀͠R̵͚̳̯̲̰̠̮͉̞͊͛̌͒̎͊͊E̵͔̻͉̥̪̘͑͊͋̒͌̄͆̈́͝͠͠ ̴̢͇̰̘͔̄́̊͂̚M̴̢̨̛͓̝̻̲̲̙̗̫̭̉̅͒̂͆͗ͅE̵̖̟̤̩̽͆̿?̵̜̟̪͇̮̖͕͍̞͚̏̋͜͠!̴̗͍͎̻̄̽̄͜ ̴̢̣̭̰͕̯̱͓̤̫̭̱̆̈̾̒̆̐̓̒̕Ȉ̷̢͕̻̐̇̈́’̷̨̯̙̱̫͓̎́͊̇̀̀͂́̈́̓́̒̚L̷͓̪̱̞̟̼̭̅̋̈͋͊̒́͋͊̚͝Ļ̵̼͇̜̪̞̬̩̟̇̾̏̐̋͜͜͝ͅ ̷̛̜̬͈͎̞̝͓͙̘̼̙͛̌͗̋̈́̃̄͐̌̉̿̏͝ͅM̷̧͔̞̩̎͆̉̇͘͘͝A̵̰͈̦̪̯̓̏̓̊̍̾͌͂̀̾̓̚̕Ḵ̵̢̛͈̰̻̲̜̞̦̩̽͑̍̏̀͆͘͝ͅḚ̶͘ ̴͇̞͚̩̋̓̕̕ͅS̵̢̺̹̠̭͇̙̗̺͓͐̓̍̉̐̓̌̚͘͝͝Ü̷̞̹̖̲̲̾̆̀̋͊͑̓̆̏̕͘R̴̨̤͖̣̮̥͖͚̠̃̓̍Ę̶̧̱̮̪̝͙͕̲̩͎͖̜̈́̓̓͝ ̸̧͔̘̺̺͈̝͚͈̠̼̘͕̮̋Y̴̰̖̰̠̭͍̪͗͒̌̄͑͘͜O̴͕̭̅̍̀̽̈́̒̕̚̚͝Ú̴̪͙͔̳̩̳̏͛̍͜͝R̵̢̧̯̣̝̫̗̙̖̪͍͎̍͛̏̇̌͊͝͝ ̴͉̠̗̲̠͕̞̠͙̣̩̊̌̈̏̊̀̒̂U̵̪͂̋̄Ņ̵͓̻̬̺̫͚̭͖͓͍̥͂͐̉̀͐̀̄̈̇̃͆̚͝Į̶̤̟̱̼̀͂́̃V̷̨̞̝̹̜̞͙̜̣̖̝̔̏̅͌͋͝E̶̜̅̃̽́͌͗͒̉̈́͘̚R̴͓̜̹̟̅͒̌̂̂̒̓͌͛̀̈̿͠͝Ŝ̴̮̜͔̙̹̪͎̉͝E̷̗̩̱͎̺̱̐̓̇͐̊͑̍̅̀͂ ̸̝͉̩͔̞̤͕̓̊̅̃̍̆͠͝E̸̡̧̛͔͉͔̱̬̻̪̘̣̍̅͑̀̍̅̏̉̏̓͑͜N̶̛̑͒͐̋͐͑̾̍ͅD̴͓́̾͂̏́́́̑͘S̸̩̖̥̪͇̄̀͒̀͋̄̇́̀͌͂̕͘͠ ̵̡̡̹̩̣͍͙̉̾̉͋̔̀̕̚I̷̺̺̬̍̎̋͗̽́̈́̈́͝Ņ̷͙̤̙̑͛̔̆̀̊́ ̷̺̰̥͖͚̟̱̰̹͙̆̏̈́͗̿̿̓͝H̴̢̖̲̖̮̤̳̝̟͚̥̉̑̀͆̕E̷̺̱̒̅̒̿̃̀̿̚͘̚͝L̸̨̲͉̰̣̞͚̻͇̣͓̓̄̑͗̊͆̚͜Ļ̸̡̙̻̹͙̪̹̤̱̞̓̀̈́͛̽̈́͂̚ͅ!̷̩̳̙̀̋͊̅̚!̵̛̦̏͆̂̈́̈**

**sleepy child** : abracadabra stfu bitch

 **Alter Ego?** :

 **all i want for christmas** : youre amazing himiko!!! save us!!

 **sleepy child** : i will

 **sleepy child** : abracuntdabra leave us tf alone ugly ass skanky whore looking ass bitch

**character file 011011100110111101110100001000000110110101100101.ch deleted**

**chrostmas carol** : were all the swear words necessary.....?

 **sleepy child** : i just wanted to insult her because she scared tenko

 **all i want for christmas** : tenko wasnt scared!!!!

 **all i want for christmas** : she was... mildly surpised

 **corpse fucker** : what’s that??

 **corpse fucker** : smells like bullshit

 **all i wamt for christmas** : i dont want to hear that from a corpse fucker

 **corpse ficker** : you wound me

 **all i want for christams** : good

 **santa cospoay** : time to go to sleep after being traumatized and used by someone i trusted again

 **christnas carol** : sounds like any other tuesday to me

 **blueberry** : mood

 **corpse ficker** : lmao same

 **all i want for christmas** : same

 **xmas karaoke champion** : relatable

 **mrs claus** : That’s it. Therapy. All of you.

**[7.00am]**

**worse than hell**

**bot on the pot** : what did i miss??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was half asleep writing most of this chapter
> 
> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> spikey wikey uwu = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> corpse fucker = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara


	41. im so lazy nowadays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hhhh all my chapters feel so rushed,,

**[5.59pm]**

**worse than hell**

**  
christmas carol** : FUCKING BITCH

 **all i want for christmas** : KAEDE?!?!?!

 **christmas carol** : SON OF A BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKER

 **blueberry** : just

 **blueberry** : just let her vent

 **christmas carol** : I WILL FUCKING END YOUR BLOODLINE

 **santa cospaly** : FINE YOU WIN

 **christmas carol** : im glad we could reach an agreement shirogane :)

 **santa cosplay** : h

 **spikey wikey uwu** : oh no theyve corrupted her

 **corpse fucker** : YES KAYAYDAY JOIN THE DARK SIDEEEEEE

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : what the fuck was that

 **santa cosplay** : sorry kokichi but the heathers are going to wear skirts now

 **corpse fucker** : wh

 **corpse fucker** : no

 **corpse fucker** : gtfo of the dark side kayayday

 **blueberry** : i dont think thats a good idea??

 **santa cospaly** : its either boys in skirts or a horny akamatsu murders me

 **loveliest gitl** : HORNY?!?!!

 **christmas caro** l: NO WAIT SHES LYING

 **loveliest girl** : I CAN BE A BOY IN A SKIRT DONT LEAVE ME

 **christmas carol** : id never leave you!!!! you make me the horniest!! boys in skirts are boring anyway!!!

 **xmas karaoke champion** : remember the kink list i got

 **christmas carol** : dont you dare

 **xmas karaoke champion** : “boys in skirts” is #1 on akamatsu’s list

 **loveliest girl** : SO YOU ARE HORNY

 **christmas carol** : SHUT UPPPPPP

 **corpse fucker** : too bad you wont see me in a skirt tho

 **santa cosplay** : but youre a heather??? you have to wear a skirt!!

 **corpse fucker** : hhhh

 **coprse fucker** : fineee

 **christmas carol** : YES

 **christmas carol** : uh i mean

 **blueberry** : are you sure kokichi

 **coprse fucker** : yeah whatever idc

 **corpse fucker** : but ill only wear the skirt when we’re performing

 **corpse fucker** : _not_ during practice

 **santa cospaly** : that’s fine ofc!! whatever you’re comfortable with!!!

 **green grape** : kokcihi i really dont think this is a good idea

 **corpse fucker** : my life is full of bad ideas why not add more to the pile??

 **mrs claus** : _That’s_ what you were yelling about? _@christmas carol_

 **christmas carol** : ,,,,,yes

 **mrs claus** : I thought it was because Naegi got your role as Veronica.

 **christmas carol** : DONT REMIND ME AAAAHHHHHHH

 **christmas carol** : HHHHHH I WILL FIGHT THIS BOTTOM

 **coprse fucker** : arent you a bottom

 **chdistsmas carol** : IM A SWITCH

 **green hrape** : but youd bottom for harukawa anytime

 **corpse fucker** : and kirumommy

 **loveliest gril** : AND ME

 **loveliest girl** : HOW TF DID YALL UGLY ASS FUCKERS FORGET ABOUT ME HER GF

 **loveliest girl** : dumbass bitches

 **someone will die of fun** : you will perish at sundown _@green grape_

 **mrs claus** : Your body will never be found. _@corpse fucker_

 **corpse fucker** : welp it was nice knowing yall see ya

  
**[3.10am]**

**worse than hell**

**corpse fucker** : why the fuck is syo jd

 **loveliest girl** : syo really fucking the wrong naeggi on stage

 **corpse fucker** : SJSJSJSJSJS DEAD

 **green grape** : ok but imagine

 **green grape** : the naeggi’s switch places for dead girl walking and then switch again

 **loveliewt girl** : damn the naegi’s rlly after that serial killer ass

 **corpse fucker** : fukawa punching the air rn

 **mrs claus** : Why are you awake?

 **corpse fucker** : cuz i can

 **corpse fucker** : whatchu gonna do?? tuck me into bed and say you love me???

 **mrs claus** : Wh

 **mrs claus** : No???

 **coprse fucker** : welp i tried

 **corpse fucker** : who wants to be my mommy now??

 **green hrape** : jfc we get it you have trauma

 **mrs claus** : If me tucking you into bed will get you to sleep I guess I’ll have to.

 **corpse fucker** : what

 **mrs claus** : Can you not read?

 **corpse fucker** : h

 **loveliest girl** : cant tell if it’s just his bi or if he really has mommy issues

 **green grape** : its probabyl both

 **mrs claus** : Bed.

 **green grape** : aye aye captain

 **loveliest girl** : yes mommy

 **mrs claus** : Unbirthed. Back in the womb.

 **green grape** : HAHAHHASISHHAUA

 **loveoiest girl** : yes unbirth me thats so hot

 **green grape** : your kink list is endless

 **xmas karaoke champion** : it really is

 **green grape** : babe,, where did you come from,,,

 **xmas karaoke champion** : hell

 **loveliest girl** : bitch this is hell

 **mrs claus** : 5

 **green grape** : oh shit

 **mrs claus** : 4

 **xmas karaoke champion** : adios

**2 users are offline**

**mrs claus** : 3

 **loveliesr tirl** : lmao whatchu gon do

 **mrs claus** : 2

 **mrs claus** : 1

 **mrs claus** : Sigh. You leave me no choice.

 **mrs claus** : I’ll have to punish you.

 **loveliest girl** : kinky ;)

 **mrs claus** : I love and care about you.

 **loveliest girl** : wh

 **mrs claus** : You’re appreciated.

 **loveliest girl** : TF IS THIS SHIT

 **mrs claus** : (Some of) your inventions are amazing and you’re incredibly talented.

 **logeliest girl** : CAN I GET A FUCKING SAFEWORD

 **mrs claus** : You’re absolutely gorgeous.

**loveliest girl is offline**

**mrs claus** : Finally.

**[7.01am]**

**wrose than hell**

**corpse fucker** : WHY TF IS THERE SO MUCH SNOW WH

 **green grape** : there’s no snow for weeks and then it all comes pouring down once a month

 **christmas carol** : that would be terrifying

 **good boy!!** : gonta misses bugs :(

 **sleepy child** : i can do a spell that makes bugs come

 **good boy!!** : bugs would die in cold!!

 **sleepy child** : hocus pocus summer weather

 **corpse fucker** : that didn’t even rhyme

 **bot on the pot** : Why did all the snow just melt away???

 **mrs claus** : There’s a flood in Hope’s Peak now.

 **loveliewt girl** : YESS NO SCHOOL WHOOOOOOOOOOOO

 **christmas carol** : about that...

 **green grape** : oh no

 **christmas carol** : _Principal Kirigiri: Please tell your classmates that just because there’s a little flood doesn't mean they can skip school. I expect all of them in class in 8 minutes._

 **blueberry** : with that much water around we’ll have to travel by boat

 **green grape** : is that monomi-sensei and monokuma-sensei????

 **xmas karaoke champion** : i hate humanity

 **corpse fucker** : are they even humans

**[2.34pm]**

**How Do You Do, Fellow Kids?**

**dumb loli sister** : taking all the students to class by boat because of the flood was so fun!!

 **dumb loli sister** : especially when monokuma fell off the boat :)

 **ugly loli** : NDWINDWIDJIWDNWIDN ANAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

 **AMAZING NINJA** : OMG MONOMI-AUNT AJASJAISJAJSAK

 **toaster #2** : It was entertaining.

 **the annoying blue one** : FCK YEEEEE GUT KAMRA MONOKUMA

 **bearkuya topawmi** : i don’t even know what you’re saying anymore.

 **ugly loli** : dont worry im fluent in dumbass

 **sexy bear dad** : ofc you are youre a big ol dumbass

 **sexy bear dad** : also fuck you _@dumb loli sister_

 **dumb loli sister** : im still the favorite teacher 😗

 **sexy bear dad** : no one likes you uggo 🤬🤬

 **dumb loli sister** : and what does that say about you, least favorite? 🤭😳

 **ugly loli** : DRAAAAGGG HIMMM

 **AMAZING NINJA** : omg ur name O.o

 **ugly loli** :

 **ugly loli** : fucking obliterate him,, make sure his body is never found,, the police wont even know hes gone until his rotting corpse is in front of them

 **sexy bear dad** : damn rlly hope ouma wont see my hot corpse 🥵😳😍

 **bearkuya topawmi** : even if he’s a corpse fucker he still has standarts.

 **AMAZING NINJA** : lmao no one would fuck you

 **sexy bear dad** : says mr tried to fuck his own sister

 **AMAZIGN NINJA** : I WAS 12 OK

 **dumb loli sister** : we were 12 kacchan!!

 **ugly loli** : DEAD

 **the annoying blue one** : I SAW THM FUCCNG IT WAS HUT

 **toaster #2** : I despise every single one of you. When I take over the world none of you will be left alive. You’ll be bleeding out, lonely, with everyone hating you because it’s your fault. _They_ know it. _You_ know it. It’s all your fault.

 **ugly loli** : dude i am in literal tears wtf

 **AMAZING NINJA** : :’(

 **toaster #2** : You shall be the first die.

 **AMAZING NINJA** : ÒmÓ

 **dumb loli sister** : (◞‸◟)

 **toaster #2** : Aunt Monomi is an exception. She shall live in my mansion.

 **ugly loli** : BRUH FAVORTISM

 **AMAZIGN NINJA** : heart been broke too many times

 **sexy bear dad** : damn tryna get into mononmonomonomi’s pants before me???

 **toaster #2** : Your death will be the most painful.

 **sexy bear dad** : fuck yeah im into that shit

 **bearkuya topawmi** : i despise every single one of you

 **ugly loli** : sucks to suck bearkuya

 **bearkuya topawmi** : 🤔🎁

 **bearkuya topawmi** : 😳🖕

 **ugly loli** : 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕 ****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> green grape = Rantaro Amami  
> christmas carol = Kaede Akamatsu  
> spikey wikey uwu = Ryoma Hoshi  
> mrs claus = Kirumi Tojo  
> all i want for christmas = Tenko Chabashira  
> holiday spirit = Angie Yonaga  
> xmas karaoke champion = Korekiyo Shinguji  
> loveliest girl= Miu Iruma  
> good boy!! = Gonta Gokuhara  
> corpse fucker = Kokichi Ouma  
> twinkle twinkle little star = Kaito Momota  
> santa cosplay = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> bot on the pot = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> someone will die of fun = Maki Harukawa  
> sleepy child = Himiko Yumeno  
> blueberry = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> how do you do, fellow kids?
> 
> sexy bear dad = Monokuma  
> dumb loli sister = Monomi/Usami  
> the annoying blue one = Monokid (blue monokub)   
> topawmi = Monosuke (yellow monokub)  
> toaster #2 = Monodam (green monokub)  
> ugly loli = Monophanie (pink monokub)  
> AMAZING NINJA = Monotaro (red monokub)


	42. Because becuase because pickles pickles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i made this in school 😃

**[7.57pm]**

**worse than hell**

**santa cosplay** : if you havent slept in two days and forget to eat clap ur hands

 **corpse fucker** : 😃👏

 **blueberry** : 👏 

**christmas carol** : 👏👏👏👏

 **loveliest girl** : 👏👏

 **mrs claus** : 👏

 **xmas karaoke special** : 👏

 **spikey wikey uwu:** clap

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : are yall ok

 **corpse fucker** : lmao yall

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : stfu

 **bot on the pot** : I shall force all of you to go to sleep at exactly 8pm! If you’re not sleeping by 8 then I’ll have to use.... special methods...

 **corpse fucker** : wow would you look at the time it’s sleep o’clock

**corpse fucker is offline**

**christmas carol** : i love sleep 😃👍

 **Christmas carpl** : yup yup sleep is amazing

**christmas carol is offline**

**bot on the pot** : 10

 **bot on the pot** : 9

**15 users are offline**

**bot on the pot** : It actually worked! :D

**bot on the pot is offline**

  
  


  
**[3.20am]**

**worse than hell**

**loveliest girl** : _@santa cosplay_ you’re the kokichi to my harukawa

 **corpse fucker** : oohh kinky

 **someone will die of fun** : _do you wanna die?_

 **santa cosplay** : you’re the miu to my hoshi

 **loveliest girl** : bitch i am miu

 **loveliest girl** : you’re the harukawa to my angie

 **someone will die of fun** : stop mentioning me

 **holiday spirit** : Angie doesn’t hate Maki!! Just mildly despises!!~~

 **good boy!!** : correct gonta if wrong but mildly despise is hate

 **holiday spirit** : oops :)

 **chirstmas carol** : scary

 **sleepy child** : sexy

 **all i want for christmas** : HIMIKO?!?!?

 **santa cospaly** : you’re the kokichi to my kaito pre-crush

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : CRUSH?!?!?!} WH

 **blueberry** : crush?

 **corpse fucker** : YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T TELL YOU BTICH

 **loveliest girl** : youre the 79th class to my tojo

 **mrs claus** : With a few exceptions.

 **christmas carol** : 79th??? but that’s us????

 **mrs claus** : You are one of the exceptions, don’t worry.

 **christmas carol** : oh! :D

 **corpse fucker** : ofc she is

 **corpse fcuker** : shes the reverse harem protag 🙄🙄🙄🙄

 **blueberry** : why are you two mad at each other _@santa cosplay @loveliest girl_

 **santa cosplay** : that bitch stole my wigs!!!

 **loveliest girl** : and im burning them too if you dont give my blueprints back saggy tits

 **santa cospaly** : absolutely not

**loveliest girl changed santa cosplay to saggy tits**

**saggy tits** : disgusting.

 **christmas carol** : blueprints???

 **spikey wikey uwu** : _don’t ask._

 **chirstmas carol** : it can’t be that bad!!

 **loveliest girl** : a dildo strap that lets the person wearing it feel everything like a real dick!

 **christmas carol** : nvm wtf

 **spikey wikey uwu** : _i warned you._

 **loveliest girl** : it was commissioned by _@someone will die of fun_ so she can finally fuck moronta in the ass

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : WHAT ?!?!?!}!??! IS EVERYONE AFTER MY ASS NOW!!}}!!{??>!{?!!

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : i cant trust anyone anymore

 **someone will die of fun** : she’s lying trust me

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : how can i trust you :’(

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : i’ve been betrayed by everyone i trust

 **corpse fucker** : dramatic ass bitch

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : hypocrite

 **someone will die of fun** : im ur super cool gf you have to trust me

 **twinkle twinkle little star** : fair enough

 **blueberry** : ....why are we friends again??

 **corpse fucker** : anywayyy that invention sounds absolutely amazing lemme have it _@loveliest girl_

 **loveliest girl** : dont you already have a dick???

 **corpse fucker** : .....

 **corpse fucker** : ............double penetration..

 **corpse fucker** : yeah that

 **loveliest girl** : ohohohojo didnt know you were into that

 **loveliest girl** : in that case youll be the first to get it

 **cirpse fucker** : YES

 **loveliest girl** : though i need someone to test it on

 **loveliest girl** : _@everyone_ who wants to give me a bj

**saggy tits kicked loveliest girl from worse than hell**

**corpse fucker** : but the didlidio :(

**saggy tits removed admin from 2 users**

**saggy tits** : no one is adding her back

 **saggy tits** : i need to sleep knowing i stopped her from creating a nightmare

**saggy tits is offline**

**green grape** : oh thank god i didn’t wanna be the one to remove her

 **Alter Ego** : Goodnight Sequence starting!!

 **chirtsmas carol** : what

 **Alter Ego** : in 3..

 **Alter Ego** : 2...

 **copse fucker** : WAIT

 **Alter Ego** : what

 **coprse fucker** : 🖕

**Alter Ego muted corpse fucker for 2 days**

**Alter Ego** : 1...

**Alter Ego deleted worse than hell**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoops?? anywayy they’ll create a new chat im not ending this chatfic yet lmao


	43. I am w,,w whw,,wwwhwjqw,wn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wow im back yall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who just lost their entire wattpad acc and every dumb draft and fun thing to read when bored :D!! guess who just made tsumugi lose hers too :D!! literally a lot of the chapters are just something i thought of or something that happened to me and i think: “mmmm worse than hell chatfic 🥵” my reaction wasnt as extreme tho lol i didnt lose too much it was just rlly annoying

**[7.23am]**

  
**Kaede Akamatsu created a chat**

**[7.49am]**

**Kaede Akamatsu added Shuichi Saihara, K1-B0 and 13 others**

**Kaede Akamatsu removed admin from 14 users**

**Kaede Akamatsu changed unnamed chat to haha kokichi has no admin**

**Miu Iruma** : hello mothers and fuckers of the jury the great inventor has appeared!!!

 **Kokichi Ouma** : _**[REDACTED]**_

 **Kokichi Ouma** : wtf

 **Kokichi Ouma** : _**[REDACTED]**_

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : i created a role specifically for you :)

 **Rantaro Amami** : “bi baby jail” AKAJAJSK

 **Korekiyo Shinguji** : You are hilarious, Akamatsu.

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : .....i cant tell if thats sarcastic or not

 **Kokixhi Ouma** : WAAAHHHHHHH YOURE SO CRUEL DAYYAYKAYMAY-CHANNNNNNNNNNNNN

 **Kokichi Ouma** : I LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?!?!?!?!?!

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : bitch when

 **Kokichi Ouma** : i helped you and that dumb w———-hore get together 😁😁😁

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : you did?????

 **Miu Iruma** : HES LYING I DIDNT NEED HIS DUMB HELP

 **Rantaro Amami** : wow what a sick burn

 **Miu Iruma** : fuck off avorecado

**Kirumi Tojo changed Rantaro Amami to avorecado**

**Kirumi Tojo** : You’re welcome. :)

**Kirumi Tojo is offline**

**avorecado** : .......

 **Miu Iruma** : BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

 **Kokichi Ouma** : OMIGODHAHHAUAUWHAHA

 **avorecado** : what did i do to deserve this

 **Korekiyo Shinguji** : whisper “what are you doing step-bro?” in my ear while fucking me

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : i fucking hate life

 **Kokichi Ouma** : HAHAHAHAUAHAIANAIABAJA

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : TOO MUCH INFO!!!!

 **Miu Iruma** : JAJAIANAIANAKA AJAO’OM9GMGH MYGODODNS JAJA

 **Tenko Chabashira** : YOU DEGENERATE!! WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE!!

 **avorecado** : that was one time...

 **Korekiyo Shinguji** : you whispered memes to me during an intimate moment

**avorecado is offline**

**Kokichi Ouma** : NOOO GET BACK HERE AHAHAJAOANAJA

 **Miu Iruma** : HOLY SHIITITIRIR SISNSBAJABA

  
  
  


**[3.34am]**

**haha kokichi has no admin**

**Tsumugi Shirogane** : MOTHERFUCKER

 **Miu Iruma** : hey fuck off sagg tits the gorgeous girl genius needs her beauty sleep

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : i just lost my entire wattpad account

 **Kokichi Ouma** : so???

 **Tsumugu Shirogane** : MY DRAFT FOR THE THIRD SEQUEL OF THE SAIOUMA FANFIC!!!! GONE!!! DEAD!!!

 **Shuichi Saihara:** good

**Shuichi Saihara is offline**

**avorecado** : power move

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : my entire life is ruined

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : well now you can focus on the musical right???

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : NO

 **Tsumugi Shiroane** : NOW ILL HAVE EVEN LESS SLEEP THAN BEOFRE TRYING TO REWRITE THE 20 CHAPTERS I LOST FUCK MY LIFE

 **avorecado** : alright mugi just take a deep breath

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : i dont need oxygen it disappoints me

 **avorecado** : how the hell are you still living???? fall over and die

 **Tsumugi Shiroagen** : ehhh soon

 **Kokichi Ouma** : cant you just ask that ult fanfic writer to write the saiouma fic while you put more focus on the musical????

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : hes a fucking expensive little bitch said he’ll only do it for minimum ¥10 480,35

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : i mean he’s expensive for a reason

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : talented guy ultimate writing prodigy worthy

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : he really is!!!! maybe i should beg celestia-san to make him write my fic for ¥104,80

 **avorecado** : $1???? dude...

 **Miu Iruma** : why tf did you change the money into dollars?????

 **Kokichi Ouma** : we’re literally japanese we use yen why would you translate that dumb shit for us

 **avorecado** : for the readers ;)

 **Tsumugi Shirogane** : we’re getting off track!!! kokichi you should come try the heathers costume tommorow after school and then practice act 1 and tommorow’s tommorow act 2

 **Kokichi Ouma** : i can literally act the entire musical word for word every role but aight

 **Tsumugi Shiroagen** : great!!! im going to die for an hour!! goodnight!!

**Tsumugi Shorgane is offline**

**Kaede Akamatsu** : ....yikes

**[7.04am]**

**haha kokichi has no admin**

**Kokichi Ouma** : _@Miu Iruma_

 **Miu Iruma** : tf??? i need sleep skank

 **Kokcihi Ouma** : miu a

 **Kokichi Ouma** : miu are y

 **Kokichi Ouma** : areyy oj

 **Kokichi Ouma** : are

 **avorecado** : take your time

 **Kokichi Ouma** : yoi

 **Kokichi Ouma** : are yo

 **Kokichi Ouma** : you whornyy????

 **Himiko Yumeno** : ......what the fuck did i just wake up

 **Himiko Yumeno** : this is why i sleep all day

 **Himiko Yumeno** : to escape your bullshit ouma

**Himiko Yumeno is offline**

**Kaede Akamatsu** : is miu ok she hasnt stopped laughing for awhile now

 **K1-B0** : neither has ouma or amami

 **Shuichi Saihara** : scroll up

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : why are they like this

**Kirumi Tojo changed Miu Iruma to whorny**

**Kirumi Tojo** : Breakfast is ready.

 **Kaede Akanatsu** : ........

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> only changed names rn:
> 
> avorecado = Rantaro Amami  
> whorny = Miu Iruma


	44. The amount of emojis in this chapter is just too much 😱

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> did ya miss me??? :D (lmao u dont have to lie)

**[2.59am]**

**haha kokichi has no admin**

  
**Tsumugi Shirogane** : yknow reposting art is such a tiny dick move to do 😁 especially when you give no credit,, “credit to the artist😍🥰😘😗🤓🥳🤩” is not fucking credit you untalented bitch. learn how to fucking draw instead of stealing other people’s art. i don’t care if “it’s too hard 😢😢😣😔🥶😱😨!” so fucking what? practice makes perfect tho with someone as untalented as you having to steal others art for attention and validation from people since no one will ever love you i doubt youd make anything worth while 🥰 go fuck yourself with your tiny weenie dick since no one ever will 😍💅

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : .....what.

 **Angie Yonaga** : Whoo!! Go Tsumugi!!~~

 **whorny** : BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

 **Tsumugi Shiroagen** : WRONG CHAT IM SO SORRY

 **avocunt** : tojo i have a request

 **Kirumi Tojo** : Done.

**Kirumi Tojo changed Tsumugi Shirogane to you have tiny dick energy 🥰**

**you have tiny dick energy** 🥰: NOOOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭😭

 **Kokichi Ouma** : HAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG SJSK

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : this is too much

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : too fucking much

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : i wish i never woke up

 **Kokichi Ouma** : on god?

 **Ryoma Hosh** i: you’re why i have depression

 **Kokichi Ouma** : OUCH

 **avocunt** : JAANSHJANAJANA

 **whorny** : LMAOOO

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : please just get along

 **K1-B0** : Everyone! You should be sleeping! We have school at 7.30am!

 **Kirumi Tojo** : You heard the man. Sleep, brats.

 **Kokichi Ouma** : 😢

 **Kirumi Tojo** : _@Kaede Akamatsu @Gonta Gokuhara @Ryoma Hoshi_ Goodnight ❤️

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : why cant yall just get along ;-;

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : oh!!! goodnight!!!!! <3333

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : night

**Ryoma Hoshi muted haha kokichi has no admin for a year**

**Kokichi Ouma** : YJAHAJAHJYJYJA A YEAR????!?!?!?!!

 **avocunt** : damn he rlly sick of us 😔

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : i give up

**Kaede Akamatsu gave admin to 1 user**

**Kaede Akamatsu removed admin from 1 user**

**Kaede Akamatsu** : do your worst im going to sleep forever

**Kaede Akamatsu muted haha kokichi has no admin for 10 years**

**whorny** : omg babe dont be depressed ur so sexy

 **whorny** : no srlsrly im cuming

 **you have tiny dick energy** 🥰: you

 **you have tiny dick energy** 🥰: you misspelled

 **whorny** : 😉

**whorny is offline**

**Kokichi Ouma changed haha kokichi has no admin to even kaede went mad**

**Kokichi Ouma** : gn my fellow soldiers ill see you on the other side

 **avocunt** : k

**All users are offline**

**[7.00am]**

**even kaede went mad**

**Gonta Gokuhara** : gonta sorry gonta no reply last night!!! @kirumi

 **Kirumi Tojo** : It’s fine. I’m glad you were asleep at that time.

 **Kirumi Tojo** : _ahem_

 **Kokichi Ouma** : don’t throw shade

 **you have tiny dick energy** 🥰: GUYS

 **Shuichi Saihara** : ??

 **you have tiny dick energy** 🥰 : I CAN’T BELIEVE WE MISSED VALENTINE’S DAY

 **whorny** : _you_ missed valentine’s day

 **whorny** : _i_ was fucking my gf

 **Kokichi Ouma** : damn is that tru

 **whorny** : ofc it is twink

**Kokichi Ouma unmuted even kaede went mad for Kaede Akamastu**

**Kaede Akamatsu** : you can do that??!?

 **Kokichi Ouma** : is it true youre a bottom

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : is it true you have a praise kink

 **Kokichi Ouma** : WHAT

 **whorny** : HOLY FUCK SHAHAHAHAJ

 **avocunt** : its true

 **Tenko Chabashira** : TOO MUCH INFO!!!! TOOMUCHINFO!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **Himiko Yumeno** : _@Kokichi Ouma_ good boy

 **Kokichi Ouma** : SHUT THE FUCK UP

 **Tenko Chabashira** : HIMIKO?!?!?! NOO PLS STAY PURE

**Kirumi Tojo changed Kokichi Ouma to puppy**

**Shuichi Saihara** : stop kinkshaming my bf

 **Kaito Momota** : OH GOD I TOLD HIM HE DID A GOOD JOB 3 MONTHS AGO WTF

 **Kaito Momota** : HE DIDN’T GET OFF ON THAT RIGHT

 **Maki Harukawa** : no idiot

 **puppy** : i fucking hate all of you

**Kirumi Tojo created a new role**

**Angie Yonaga** : Oh my!! How fun!!~~

 **Korekiyo Shinguji** : “little puppy <3” role ,, ouma can’t change his nickname in the chat anymore

 **puppy** : correction,, i hate kirumi the most

**puppy removed admin from 1 user**

**puppy gave admin to 1 user**

**puppy changed K1-B0 to my only friend 💔**

**my only friend 💔** : So we are friends! I’m glad to have officially befriended you, Ouma-kun! I hope you can move past your robophobic ways now!

 **puppy** : never kinkshame me and i wont be robophobic

 **my only friend** 💔: Why would I kinkshame you?? It’s incredibly rude and it’s not my business...

 **puppy** : this is why youre my _ONLY_ bff

 **puppy** : _@Shuichi Saihara @avocunt @whorny_ 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

 **Shuichi Saihara** : i never kinkshamed you infact i defended you

 **puppy** : denying it wouldve saved my dignity

 **avocunt** : im not sorry ❤️

 **puppy** : you will be

 **avocunt** : pfft sure

 **puppy** : i’ll destroy your fake lashes

 **avocunt** : sorry im on team #dontkinkshamekokichi now 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈

 **whorny** : YOU WEAR FAKE LASHES?!?!

 **Tenko Chabashira** : I KNEW THE DEGENERATES LASHES WERE TOO BEAUTIFUL TO BE REAL

 **puppy** : did you just compliment a boy O.O

 **Tenko Chabashira** :

**Tenko Chabashira muted even kaede went mad for 2 hours, reason:** _this is so embarrassing i just wanna kill myself_

**puppy** : AKAKAHA

 **Angie Yonaga** : Watch out, Rantaro!! Tenko-chan might just kill you so there are no witnesses to know she ever complimented a boy!!~~

 **avocunt** : i crave the sweet release of death

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : that’s my line

 **Gonat Gokuhara** : that is no one’s line!! no one is dying!!! :(

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : nvm living is great

 **whorny** : *whispers* simp

 **puppy** : *yells* hypocrite

 **avucunt** : *speaks normally* why tf are yall doing the asterisk asterisk thing

 **Kaito Momota** : tf is is an asteriks

 **Maki Harukawa** : goddamnit take off your pants

 **Kaito Momota** : wha

**2 users are offline**

**puppy** : lmao she’s actually moronsexual 😭😭😭💅💅

 **Shuichi Saihara** : is she really getting turned on from kaito being dumb......??

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : i want to move classes,,

 **Ryoma Hoshi** : seems like im the only sane one here now

**[2.11pm]**

**the sane ones**

**ten-ish yrs old kicked knife to meat you from the sane ones**

**ten-ish yrs old** : _@maid to serve @pain-o_ thin ice

 **i detected ur bullshit** : rip maki too horny to sane

 **bug** : horny?? maki have horns??

 **pain-o** : i mean,,, is she that kinky??

 **ten-ish yrs old muted pain-o for 1 hour, reason:** thin _ice, akamatsu_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (main chat)
> 
> avocunt = Rantaro Amami  
> whorny = Miu Iruma  
> puppy = Kokichi Ouma  
> you have tiny dick energy 🥰 = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> my only friend 💔 = K1-B0 (Kiibo)
> 
> (the sane ones)
> 
> pain-o = Kaede Akamatsu (pain-o = piano)  
> ten-ish yrs old = Ryoma Hoshi (ten-ish = tennis)  
> maid to serve = Kirumi Tojo (maid = made)  
> bug = Gonta Gokuhara  
> i detected ur bullshit = Shuichi Saihara (detected = detective or smth)  
> (knife to meat you = Maki Harukawa ((knife to meat you = nice to meet you)))


	45. Call me maybe 🤠💅

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the chapter titles have nothing to do with the chapters lmao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> people who make kokichi call shuichi shumai (the nickname kokichi made) in aus where kokichi hasnt met kaito and/or maki makes no sense to me,, kokichi made the nickname to make fun of the nickname kaito made for maki (maki roll/harumaki) if i remember correctly (i could be wrong, my memory’s absolute shit) so he probably wouldn’t make the nickname if he hasnt met kaito and/or maki yet,,
> 
> but it also doesn’t matter and people can do what they want and im just spouting bullshit

**[8.39pm]**

**even kaede went mad**

**puppy** : bro wtf some old guy just pulled out his dick in front of me 😭😭😭😭

 **Korekiyo Shinguji** : you have your phone, call the police

 **puppy** : i dont trust the red blues

 **Shuichi Saihara** : damn

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : ok mr dating a detective

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : arent you literally a criminal too

 **puppy** : shhhhhh

 **whorny** : was the dick big tho

 **puppy** : it was small and wrinkly

 **Twinko Chabashira** : STOP TYPING IN THIS CHAT RIGHT NOW DEGENERATES!!!!! TENKO DOES NOT NEED THIS INFORMATION!!!!

 **puppy** : ok simp 🙄🤚

 **Himiko Yumeno** : take that back!!!

 **puppy** : simp 🥴

 **Angie Yonaga** : you will learn to fear kami-sama.

 **puppy** : no

 **my only friend** 💔 : I suggest you all go to bed, I have a bad feeling about tomorrow.

 **avocunt** : so you want tomorrow to come faster for us???? kiibs i love you but what is that logic

 **my only friend** 💔: Love me?! I’m sorry Amami-kun but I don’t think I can reciprocate those feelings!!!!

 **avocunt** : platonically

 **my only friend** 💔: Oh!! Sorry!!!

 **avocunt** : its fine lol

 **whorny** : _@puppy_ admin

 **puppy** : why

 **whorny** : sexy

 **puppy** : fair enough

**puppy gave admin to 1 user**

**Ryoma Hoshi** : what the fuck was that conversation

 **you have tiny dick energy 🥰** : sexy

 **you have tiny dick energy** 🥰: its plain to see

 **Maki Harukawa** : with ouma and iruma involved? i doubt it

 **whorny** : OI FUCK YOU

 **puppy** : im sexy enough that ur bff is dating me

 **Maki Harukawa** : he has low standards

 **Maki Harukawa** : his second crush was kaito

 **Kaito Momota** : maki roll,, ;-;

 **Kaito Momota** : wait he had a crush on me?!?!

 **puppy** : literally everyone did he aint special 🙄🙄🙄

 **Tenko Chabashira** : tenko didnt

 **puppy** : ok lesbian

 **Angie Yonaga** : Angie didn’t either!!~~

 **puppy** : like i said, lesbian

 **Himiko Yumeno** : i didn’t

 **puppy** : ok tenko & angie simp

 **Gonta Gokuhara** : gonta didnt

 **puppy** : bcs youre in love with hoshi 🙄🙄🙄

 **puppy** : and hoshi’s in love with gonta

 **puppy** : p sure mugi and mom are aro

 **puppy** : and that leaves the rest of yall mfs

 **whorny** : i didnt have a crush on the asstronaut!!!!!!

 **puppy** :

> _**whore** : why tf is moronta kinda hot tho_
> 
> _**slut** : ikr lmao_
> 
> _**slut** : we have such low standards 😍_
> 
> _**whore** : when it comes to men_
> 
> _**whore** : i only love the prettiest queens in the universe 😍😍😍_
> 
> _**slut** : that’s a fun way of saying you hate yourself 🤭_
> 
> _**whore** : FUCK OFF_

**Kaede Akamatsu** : awwww you think im pretty?? <3

 **whorny** : ofc i fucking do

 **Maki Harukawa** : just because you two are horny for him (rightfully so) that doesn’t mean everyone is

 **puppy** :

> _**depussy** : why do you have a crush on kaito now am i not good enough to be your crush anymore 😭😭😭_
> 
> _**inbestigators** : sorry kaede but the way you look at women kills all my hope of reciprocation 💔💔_
> 
> _**depussy** : i like men too_
> 
> _**depussy** : sometimes,,_
> 
> _**inbestigators** : like when_
> 
> _**depussy** : uhh_
> 
> _**depussy** : momota????_
> 
> _**inbestigators** : and you were shaming me for having a crush on him smh 🙄🙄_
> 
> _**depussy** : have you seen his body who isnt into that_
> 
> _**inbestigators** : so you like his body and not him_
> 
> _**depussy** : im just into muscles yknow_
> 
> _**inbestigators** : cough cough gonta_
> 
> _**inbestigators** : cough cough maki_
> 
> _**inbestigators** : COUGH MIU_
> 
> _**depussy** : shuddupppp 😭😭😭😭😭😭_

  
**puppy** : i have more proof if you need it

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?!?!

 **Shuichi Saihara** : kokichi stop looking throught my phone for blackmail 🖕🖕🖕

 **puppy** : no 🥰

 **Kaito Momota** : _@Kaede Akamatsu_ you can touch my abs if you want

 **Kaede Akamatsu** : fr fr?!?!

 **whorny** : NO

 **whorny** : she can only touch my abs

 **Maki Harukawa** : no one can touch kaito expect me

 **Shuichi Saihara** : like in general or,,,

 **Maki Harukawa** : take a guess, detective

**puppy changed Maki Harukawa to territorial murder gf 💅**

**territorial murder gf** 💅: youre next 🔪 🔪 🔪 

**puppy** : if i show you proof of everyone who had a crush on kaito so you can stab them will you spare me 🥺🥺🥺

 **territorial murder gf** 💅: ill half spare you

 **you have tiny dick energy 🥰** : how does that even work 😭😭😭

 **whorny** : she’ll just chop of his legs and call it day

 **avocunt** : limbless kokichi 🥴🥵😍🥰

 **whorny** : BWAHAHAHHAAHHAHA

 **you have tiny dick energy** 🥰: JAIL JAIL

 **puppy** : DIE 🤮🤮🤮

 **territorial murder gf** 💅: clocks ticking twink

 **puppy** : oh righttt

 **puppy** :

> _**the bartender** : id love to see momota in a maid dress_
> 
> _**a regular** : ok horny bitch_
> 
> _**pole dancer** : bro who doesn’t wanna see him in a maid dress_
> 
> _**stripper** : id rather see you in a maid dress 🥰🥰_
> 
> _**pole dancer** : awwww babeeeee ❤️❤️😍😍😍😘😘😘_
> 
> _**stripper** : but yeah id love to see momota in a maid dress_
> 
> _**stripper** : just to see if im into it not cause momota’s hot or anything_
> 
> _**a regular** : i want to see it cause moronta’s hot_
> 
> _**pole dancer** : i just want blackmail <3_
> 
> _**the bartender** : this was a test_
> 
> _**stripper** : a what now_
> 
> _**the bartender** : i needed to see who’s a bottom but all of yall are 😭😭_
> 
> _**stripper** : only for momota and gonta ❤️_
> 
> _**pole dancer** : what happened to my confident daddy taro whys little bottom taro here 🤮🤮😭😭😵_
> 
> _**a regular** : LITTLE BOTTOM TARO BAHAHUSSUHSSH_

**avocunt** : i hate life

 **i have tiny dick energy** 🥰: this is why we never tell you anything _@puppy_

 **puppy** : as you should

 **Himiko Yumeno** : bad boy youre getting punished

 **Himiko Yumeno** : you shouldve been a good boy

 **puppy** : STOP BULLYING ME

 **my only friend 💔 removed chatting permission for everyone for 24 hours, reason** : _Ouma, as your friend, I have to tell you to shut the f*ck up. Honestly, you’re getting on my last nerve. No more exposing and bullying and blackmail. Not everyone is a h*rny b*tch like you who meeds validation because your parents abandoned you. Please think about what you’ve done. Love, your only friend Kiibo._

**[10.02pm]**

**strip club**

  
**pole dancer** : he just did that cause he knew he was next 🙄🙄🙄

 **the bartender** : he censored his insults 😭😭😭

 **the bartender** : precious baby ❤️❤️

 **stripper** : “Not _everyone_ is a h*rny b*tch like you who meeds validation because your parents abandoned you.”

 **stripper** : yeah precious baby

 **a regular** : i taught him that 🥴🥴

**Ryoma Hoshi _@ryoma_**

“so are we just ignoring that an old guy pulled out his dick in front of ouma”  
  


**999k likes 1.2m retweets 2.9m replies [2.10am]**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (main chat)
> 
> avocunt = Rantaro Amami  
> whorny = Miu Irma  
> puppy = Kokichi Ouma  
> you have tiny dick energy 🥰 = Tsumugi Shirogane  
> my only friend 💔 = K1-B0 (Kiibo)  
> territorial murder gf 💅 = Maki Harukawa
> 
> (private messages 1)
> 
> whore = Miu Iruma  
> slut = Kokichi Ouma
> 
> (private messages 2)
> 
> depussy = Kaede Akamatsu  
> inbestigators = Shuichi Saihara
> 
> (strip club)
> 
> stripper = Rantaro Amami  
> a regular = Miu Iruma  
> pole dancer = Kokichi Ouma  
> the bartender = Tsumugi Shirogane


End file.
